{"title":"All Our Best Sellers","description":"","products":[{"product_id":"bag-of-dicks","title":"Bag of Dicks","description":"\u003ch2\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eEat a Bag of Dicks (Literally. They’re Delicious.)\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003ePicture it you open your mail, open a package, and it's... a bag of dicks? There's no return address and you can't figure out who sent it, so you have to through everyone who you ever wronged.. just to have it be your friend who tells you it was them 2 year later. It's the perfect prank. And you can do it to whoever you want today.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003eSend them a floral bag filled with gummy dicks and a side of “who the hell sent this?” These chewy little bastards are 2.5 inches long (yes, people comment on the size), come in three shockingly tasty flavors, and arrive anonymously—unless you want credit for the prank.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003eWhether it’s a bachelor party, a coworker’s birthday, or you’re just bored and petty on a Wednesday afternoon, this is your go-to “screw you, but make it sweet.”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat’s in the Bag?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003eInside each 5 oz package, you’ll find\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e10 thick, chewy gummy dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003ein three delightfully bold flavors: red cherry, green apple, and blue raspberry. Each one is about 2.5 inches long and an inch wide at the base (a.k.a. the balls), making them surprisingly satisfying to chew- and weirdly hard to forget.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003eThe whole package comes sealed in a bold floral pouch stamped with the words\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e“Eat a Bag of Dicks”\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003eright on the front. It's weirdly classy. Shockingly colorful. And entirely unforgettable\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePerfect for:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003eAnonymous Pranks - messing with your friends and family\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003eSending a mess to your fr(enemies)... in a funny way\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003e\n\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003eBachelorette parties (bonus points if Grandma’s in town)\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003e\n\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003eBirthday pranks that escalate just enough\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003e\n\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003eGroup chat dares\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003e\n\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003eSecret Santa with no rules\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003e\n\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003eThe friend who’s always “soooo hard to shop for”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003eWhether you send it anonymously to spark chaos or sign it with pride, the outcome’s the same: confused joy, contagious laughter, and a mental image they’ll never unsee.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003ePeople love these things. Not just because they’re hilarious, but because they’re actually good. Like, “I meant to prank my roommate and ended up snacking on one myself” good. Don’t be surprised if your recipient eats the whole bag and still wants to know where it came from.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003eAnd yes, we’ve been shipping\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ebags of dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003efor years. Real ones know. If you’ve ever searched “send a bag of dicks,” “funny gummy candy,” or “anonymous prank gift,” this is what you were looking for... even if you didn’t know it yet.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003eNo glitter. No mess. Just a mouthful of mystery and a whole lot of flavor.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSend a bag. Or two. Chaos loves company.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003eMake sure you put the recipient's\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003eand\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cspan style=\"font-weight: 400;\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003ein the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Dicks By Mail - Anonymously mail a bag of dicks","offers":[{"title":"---- \/ ----","offer_id":39391283533,"sku":"292372447279","price":15.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"---- \/ Double the Dicks! A Second Bag for 1\/2 Off!","offer_id":39391296333,"sku":"","price":23.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"---- \/ Happy Birthday (EAT A BAG OF DICKS) Card!","offer_id":39391303565,"sku":"","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Penis Confetti - Add Penis-Shaped Confetti \/ Double the Dicks! A Second Bag for 1\/2 Off!","offer_id":39391279373,"sku":"","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Add Glitter for an extra surprise! \/ ----","offer_id":39391314701,"sku":"","price":20.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Add Glitter for an extra surprise! \/ Double the Dicks! A Second Bag for 1\/2 Off!","offer_id":39391319885,"sku":"","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Add Glitter for an extra surprise! \/ Happy Birthday DickHead Card!","offer_id":39391360717,"sku":"","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Penis Confetti - Add Penis-Shaped Confetti \/ Happy Birthday DickHead Card!","offer_id":39391367309,"sku":"","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Penis Confetti - Add Penis-Shaped Confetti \/ ----","offer_id":39391369741,"sku":"","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"---- \/ Happy Birthday DickHead Card!","offer_id":39391473293,"sku":"","price":21.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Add Glitter for an extra surprise! \/ Happy Birthday (EAT A BAG OF DICKS) Card","offer_id":39391502605,"sku":"","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Penis Confetti - Add Penis-Shaped Confetti \/ Happy Birthday (EAT A BAG OF DICKS) Card","offer_id":39391510157,"sku":"","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"---- \/ Happy Birthday Box!","offer_id":40215816013,"sku":"","price":21.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Penis Confetti - Add Penis-Shaped Confetti \/ Happy Birthday Box!","offer_id":40215827149,"sku":"","price":26.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Add Glitter for an extra surprise! \/ Happy Birthday Box!","offer_id":40215835277,"sku":"","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/buy-two-bag-of-dicks-get-one-free-3247013.jpg?v=1755878735"},{"product_id":"spring-loaded-dick-bomb","title":"Spring Loaded Dick Bomb!","description":"\u003ch3 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSpring Loaded Dick Bomb!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBecause life’s too short not to blast your friends in the face with exploding dicks.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eEver wished you could perfectly capture the magic of a “WTF just happened?!” moment? Something so unexpected, so wildly inappropriate, that your target is left gasping, laughing, and sweeping up tiny penis confetti for weeks? Enter the \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSpring Loaded Dick Bomb\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e, the glitter-dick-packed, prank-masterpiece disguised as a totally innocent incense tube… until \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBOOM\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIn one glorious split-second, their world goes from “Hmm, what’s this?” to \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eexploding dicks everywhere\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e. Not metaphorical dicks. Not a polite “eat a bag of dicks” greeting card. No, we’re talking \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003ereal, tangible, shiny\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003edick confetti\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e flying through the air like a glittery tsunami of shame.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSo yeah, if you’ve ever wanted to send the ultimate “I love you but I also hate you” message, \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003ethis is your weapon of choice\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e. Scroll down, smash the \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eAdd to Cart\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e button, and get ready to become the undisputed champion of petty revenge.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWhy You Need a Dick Glitter Bomb in Your Life\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSpring Loaded Dick Bomb\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e isn’t just a prank. It’s performance art. Here’s why it’s so damn satisfying:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt’s 100% unexpected\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e – Nobody thinks, “Oh, this innocent-looking incense tube is gonna shoot a dick explosion in my face.”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt’s petty perfection\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e – Revenge without the drama. Laughter without the cops.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt’s customizable\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e – Add \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003ejizz confetti\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e, more glitter, or go full chaos with both.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt’s not just for enemies\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e – Works just as well for bachelorette parties, birthdays, or the friend who “accidentally” ruined your favorite shirt.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe Art of the Exploding Dick\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePicture this:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThey pick up the package. “Hmm… what’s this?”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e They open it slowly.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e You’re somewhere across town, phone in hand, waiting like a deranged Bond villain.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSprrrrrang!\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e A \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003espring loaded dick bomb\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e erupts in a blinding storm of \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003epenis confetti\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eAnd just like that, they’re in the middle of a \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eglitter dick apocalypse\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e. It’s in their hair. It’s in their shoes. It’s on their dog. Weeks later, they’ll still be finding little sparkly dicks in the couch cushions.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eReal Reviews From People Just As Twisted As You\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e“He loved the dicks, he had to dump out his shoes after it blew all over him……”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e “Definitely loved to prank my bestie! Let’s just say I won!”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e “One of my best friends and her daughter both wore glittery outfits to my Halloween party. I am still finding glitter. And after several weeks of them laughing about it, I had to seek my revenge quietly and carefully. The only obvious solution was a dick glitter bomb. I waited eagerly in anticipation for my phone to ring. And when it did the names I was called and the giggles I had made it all worth it. The follow up texts from the glitter dick finding over the next several days not only made me feel like it was revenge well served but also made me realize that therapy isn’t necessary. The only thing I need is dick glitter bombs. I’m a lot happier now. Thanks dick glitter bombs!”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe Specs (AKA What You’re Really Paying For)\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDisguise:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Looks like a realistic incense tube\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eMechanism:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Spring loaded container that fires \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003econfetti dicks\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e with shocking force\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eExtras:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Add jizz confetti, glitter, or both for maximum chaos\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDelivery:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e 100% anonymous, no return address, no snitching\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eUses:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Anonymous prank, hilarious gag gift, bachelorette party chaos, petty revenge against friends\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eFrom:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e The masters of prank warfare, \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDicksByMail\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWhy It Works Better Than Any Lame Prank You’ve Tried\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eAnyone can send a dumb meme or say “eat a bag of dicks” in a group chat. That’s amateur hour. But a \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003espring loaded penis bomb\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e? That’s a statement. It’s personal. It’s physical comedy. It’s something they’ll be talking about for years. Hell, you might even earn legendary status in your friend group as \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003ethat\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e person, the one who pulled off the perfect \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eglitter dick bomb\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e strike.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDo It. You Know You Want To.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eYour future victim is out there right now, living their life, blissfully unaware that their carpet, clothes, and cat are about to get \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003ecovered in exploding dicks\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e. Don’t deny yourself this joy.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb id=\"docs-internal-guid-397e87c3-7fff-59b1-f1f6-f6a314228e52\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eHit that \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eAdd to Cart\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e button. Send the \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSpring Loaded Dick Bomb\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e. And bask in the glow of knowing you just unleashed a wave of glittery chaos that’ll haunt them for weeks.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003eMake sure you put the recipient's \u003cspan style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003eand\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003ein the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the dick bomb, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan size=\"4\"\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Dicks By Mail - Anonymously mail a bag of dicks","offers":[{"title":"Just Dicks","offer_id":41525668053076,"sku":"DICKBOMB","price":24.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Double The Dicks","offer_id":41525100478548,"sku":"DOUBLEDICKBOMB","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Combo Dick \u0026 Jizz Confetti","offer_id":41525100445780,"sku":"DICKANDJIZZBOMB","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Mix in Regular Glitter","offer_id":41525100511316,"sku":"DICKANDGLITTERBOMB","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Mix in Golden Shower Glitter","offer_id":41525100544084,"sku":"DICKANDGOLDENGLITTERBOMB","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Hit 'em with the ultimate combo Dicks \u0026 Jizz \u0026 Glitter","offer_id":41525100576852,"sku":"DICKJIZZANDGLITTERBOMB","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/spring-loaded-poop-emoji-glitter-cannon-prank-3477554.png?v=1755878733"},{"product_id":"eat-a-dick-giant-chocolate-dick","title":"Eat a Dick - The Chocolate Dick","description":"\u003ch3 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eEat a Dick – The Chocolate Dick\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSolid chocolate. Solid insult. Solid gold prank.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eYou know what’s better than sending someone flowers? Sending them a \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003egiant chocolate dick\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e they have to unwrap, stare at, and decide if they’re gonna bite the tip first or go straight for the base.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eEat a Dick – Chocolate Dick\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e is not subtle. It’s not romantic (unless your romance involves filthy jokes). It’s a big, solid, 4-to-5.5 inch \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003echocolate penis\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e made from gluten-free Peruvian cacao, and it shows up in a sleek black box like some luxury jewelry… if the “jewel” was a perfectly molded cocoa cock.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eAnd the best part? It ships \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e100% anonymously\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e. No sender info. No return address. Just pure, edible confusion delivered right to their door.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSo yeah, if you’ve got a friend, ex, sibling, or Valentine who deserves a big chocolate middle finger, this is it. Smash that \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eAdd to Cart\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e button and let the cocoa chaos begin.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWhy You Need to Send a Chocolate Penis\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eChocolate Dick\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e is the perfect edible “F you” for any occasion:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli aria-level=\"1\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\n\u003cp role=\"presentation\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt’s edible art\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e – Made from high-quality gluten-free Peruvian cacao, it actually tastes amazing.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli aria-level=\"1\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\n\u003cp role=\"presentation\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt’s a visual gut punch\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e – They open the box and immediately regret their life choices.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli aria-level=\"1\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\n\u003cp role=\"presentation\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt’s versatile\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e – Works for birthdays, bachelorette parties, Valentine’s Day, revenge gifts, or “just because.”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli aria-level=\"1\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\n\u003cp role=\"presentation\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt’s anonymous\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e – They’ll never know it was you… unless you’re giggling too hard to keep the secret.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe Scene You’re Creating\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eImagine this:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThey get a package. Looks fancy. They open it expecting fine chocolates or maybe a nice watch. Nope. It’s a \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003egiant chocolate cock\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e staring them in the face like, \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e“Hey there, champ. Eat me.”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThey laugh. They take a picture. They send it to three friends. Then they either eat it (because chocolate is chocolate) or put it on display like a weird edible trophy. Either way, you win.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eReal Reviews from People Who Went There\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e“Great way to prank your best friend or not-so-best friend, anonymous and hilarious.”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e “Bought it for a friend as a gag gift and it arrived on Valentine’s Day, she opened it in front of her 10-year-old son who won’t stop asking questions.”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e “Sent it to my sister and she absolutely died laughing, she loved it.”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe Delicious Details\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli aria-level=\"1\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\n\u003cp role=\"presentation\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSize:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e 4 to 5.5 inches, 3 to 4 oz of solid chocolate goodness\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli aria-level=\"1\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\n\u003cp role=\"presentation\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eMaterial:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Gluten-free Peruvian cacao – because even insults should taste gourmet\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli aria-level=\"1\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\n\u003cp role=\"presentation\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePackaging:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Sleek black box that screams “classy” until you open it\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli aria-level=\"1\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\n\u003cp role=\"presentation\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eExtras:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Optional upgraded gift box for maximum surprise factor\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli aria-level=\"1\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\n\u003cp role=\"presentation\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDelivery:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e 100% anonymous – the mystery is half the fun\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli aria-level=\"1\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\n\u003cp role=\"presentation\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eUse Cases:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Anonymous prank, birthday\/gag gift, bachelorette party, Valentine’s Day joke, breakup revenge, just because you can\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWhy It Works Every. Single. Time.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBecause even if they hate you, they can’t hate chocolate.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Because nothing breaks tension like opening a box to find a \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003ebig chocolate penis\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e staring back at you.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Because this is a prank that’s edible, harmless, and yet deeply personal.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSeriously, your “eat a dick chocolate” moment will live rent-free in their head for years. It’s a conversation starter, a photo op, and a power move all in one shiny cocoa package.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSend It. Bite It. Love It.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eHere’s the play:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli aria-level=\"1\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\n\u003cp role=\"presentation\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eClick \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eAdd to Cart\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli aria-level=\"1\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\n\u003cp role=\"presentation\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eEnter their address.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli aria-level=\"1\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\n\u003cp role=\"presentation\" dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSit back and wait for the confused text, the awkward photo, or the phone call that starts with “What the hell, man?”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt’s that simple. You can send a \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003ebig chocolate dick\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e for less than the price of a boring bouquet, and it’ll get way more laughs.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb id=\"docs-internal-guid-c363c91c-7fff-eff1-66c2-793662dace9e\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSo do it. Make someone’s day. Make them eat a dick.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e A \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003echocolate dick\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e Make sure you put the recipient's \u003cspan\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003eand\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003ein the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan size=\"4\"\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"DickAtYourDoor","offers":[{"title":"The Chocolate Dick","offer_id":930360131597,"sku":"CHOCOD","price":22.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Nuts About You Box","offer_id":41567798886484,"sku":"NUTSABOUTYOUCHOCOD","price":24.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"There's Something Fabulous In There Pride Box","offer_id":41567798919252,"sku":"FABULOUSCHOCOD","price":24.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Regal - Fake Watch Gift Prank","offer_id":42636581765204,"sku":"REGALCHOCOD","price":24.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"New Phone Gift Prank","offer_id":42636581797972,"sku":"PHONECHOCOD","price":24.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Congratulations!","offer_id":42636581666900,"sku":"CONGRATSCHOCOD","price":24.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"The Happy Birthday Box","offer_id":32160656261204,"sku":"HBDCHOCOD","price":24.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Be Mine Box","offer_id":41567798853716,"sku":"BEMINECHOCOD","price":24.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Hung Christmas Box","offer_id":42636581699668,"sku":"HUNGCHRISTMASCHOCOD","price":24.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"The Don","offer_id":42636581732436,"sku":"THEDONCHOCOD","price":24.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Santa Christmas Box","offer_id":41567799017556,"sku":"CHRISTMASCHOCOLATEDICK","price":24.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/all-the-dicks-bundle-gummy-dicks-chocolate-dick-and-dick-glitter-bomb-6404789.jpg?v=1764100227"},{"product_id":"eat-a-dick-the-christmas-dick","title":"The Chocolate Christmas Dick","description":"\u003ch3 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe Chocolate Christmas Dick\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cem\u003eBecause nothing says “Merry Christmas” like a mouth full of solid chocolate dick.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eTired of giving boring gifts like socks, candles, or that dumb bath set nobody uses? Time to level up your holiday game with something they’ll actually remember – \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe Chocolate Christmas Dick\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThis is not some flimsy little novelty candy. We’re talking about a hefty, 5 to 5.5 inch, 4 to 6 oz \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003esolid chocolate penis\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e, made with organic ingredients and delivered in a discreet box. Oh, and it has a holiday tagline that reads “Hoe hoe hoe, for the hoe in your life.”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eYes, it’s ridiculous. Yes, it’s edible. And yes, it will be the star of your Christmas morning, your white elephant exchange, or that family gift swap you always dread.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSo if you want to be the MVP of gift giving this year, scroll down and hit \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eAdd to Cart\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e. Your friends, your enemies, and maybe even grandma will thank you… eventually.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWhy You Need a Christmas Dick in Your Life\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt’s the funniest stocking stuffer ever\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e – No one forgets opening a box to find a giant chocolate cock staring back at them.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt’s actually tasty\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e – Made with organic ingredients, so your prank can also be delicious.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt’s a conversation starter\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e – And by conversation, we mean uncontrollable laughter followed by inappropriate photos.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt ships anonymously\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e – They’ll have no clue who sent it unless you want to own your masterpiece.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe Scene You’re About to Create\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt’s Christmas morning. The room smells like cinnamon and coffee. Someone picks up a small box from their stocking, opens it, and freezes. The entire room goes silent before erupting in pure chaos.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBecause inside that box is not a watch. Not a gift card. Not a heartfelt token of love. Nope. It’s a \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003ebig Christmas dick\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e made entirely of chocolate.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThere’s blushing. There’s laughter. Someone shouts “What the hell is wrong with you?” and you just smile because you know exactly what’s wrong, and it’s perfect.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eReal Reviews from People Who’ve Gone Full Naughty List\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e“Used this for a white elephant gift exchange and it by far got the best reaction! Everyone died laughing! It was perfect!”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e “I sent a Christmas dick to my ex!! He loves chocolate and it just tickles me to think of him eat a chocolate dick. He messaged me and said he wasn’t eating it. I told him to just hold it in his mouth… it would melt 🤣🤣🤣 I love it!!!! I love his reaction!!!”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e “When I told her I sent it she told me it was the greatest thing she’s ever received.”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe Delicious Details\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSize:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e 5 to 5.5 inches tall, 4 to 6 oz of solid chocolate\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eFlavor:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Rich, organic chocolate goodness\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePackaging:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Discreet box with holiday “Hoe hoe hoe” theme\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDelivery:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e 100% anonymous shipping\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eOrder Options:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e One dick, two dicks, three dicks, four dicks, six dicks for the family, ten dicks for when you’re pranking everyone\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePerfect For:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Christmas gag gift, anonymous prank, stocking stuffer, revenge gift, holiday party joke, white elephant surprise\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWhy This Gift Works Every Time\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBecause everyone loves chocolate, but no one expects it to be shaped like a penis. It’s edible, it’s hilarious, and it’s the one thing they’ll be talking about long after the tree comes down.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eEven if they pretend to be offended, they’ll probably still take a bite. And when they do, they’ll realize it’s actually good chocolate, which makes your prank even sweeter.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBe the Legend of This Year’s Christmas\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eRight now, you have the chance to turn a boring holiday gathering into an unforgettable moment of shock, laughter, and maybe a little drooling.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eClick  \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eAdd to Cart\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSend \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe Chocolate Christmas Dick\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eMake this Christmas one for the naughty list.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003cem\u003e Make sure you put the recipient's name and address in the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"DicksByMail","offers":[{"title":"Santa Box \/ One Dick!","offer_id":41726325129300,"sku":"CHRISTMASCHOCOLATEDICK-1","price":23.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Santa Box \/ Two Dicks (10% Off)!","offer_id":41726325162068,"sku":"CHRISTMASCHOCOLATEDICK-2","price":42.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Santa Box \/ Three Dicks (15% Off)!","offer_id":41726325194836,"sku":"CHRISTMASCHOCOLATEDICK-3","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Santa Box \/ Five Dicks (20% Off)!","offer_id":42612887519316,"sku":"CHRISTMASCHOCOLATEDICK-5","price":95.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Santa Box \/ Ten Dicks (25% Off)!","offer_id":41726325293140,"sku":"CHRISTMASCHOCOLATEDICK-10","price":179.92,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Hung Stocking Box \/ One Dick!","offer_id":42636622430292,"sku":"HUNGCHRISTMASCHOCOD-1","price":23.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Hung Stocking Box \/ Two Dicks (10% Off)!","offer_id":42636622463060,"sku":"HUNGCHRISTMASCHOCOD-2","price":42.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Hung Stocking Box \/ Three Dicks (15% Off)!","offer_id":42636622495828,"sku":"HUNGCHRISTMASCHOCOD-3","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Hung Stocking Box \/ Five Dicks (20% Off)!","offer_id":42636622528596,"sku":"HUNGCHRISTMASCHOCOD-5","price":95.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Hung Stocking Box \/ Ten Dicks (25% Off)!","offer_id":42636622561364,"sku":"HUNGCHRISTMASCHOCOD-10","price":179.92,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fake Watch Present Prank \/ One Dick!","offer_id":42636633210964,"sku":"REGALCHOCOD-1","price":23.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fake Watch Present Prank \/ Two Dicks (10% Off)!","offer_id":42636633243732,"sku":"REGALCHOCOD-2","price":42.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fake Watch Present Prank \/ Three Dicks (15% Off)!","offer_id":42636633276500,"sku":"REGALCHOCOD-3","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fake Watch Present Prank \/ Five Dicks (20% Off)!","offer_id":42636633309268,"sku":"REGALCHOCOD-5","price":95.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fake Watch Present Prank \/ Ten Dicks (25% Off)!","offer_id":42636633342036,"sku":"REGALCHOCOD-10","price":179.92,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fake Phone Present Prank \/ One Dick!","offer_id":42636633374804,"sku":"PHONECHOCOD-1","price":23.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fake Phone Present Prank \/ Two Dicks (10% Off)!","offer_id":42636633407572,"sku":"PHONECHOCOD-2","price":42.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fake Phone Present Prank \/ Three Dicks (15% Off)!","offer_id":42636633440340,"sku":"PHONECHOCOD-3","price":59.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fake Phone Present Prank \/ Five Dicks (20% Off)!","offer_id":42636633473108,"sku":"PHONECHOCOD-5","price":95.95,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Fake Phone Present Prank \/ Ten Dicks (25% Off)!","offer_id":42636633505876,"sku":"PHONECHOCOD-10","price":179.92,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/the-chocolate-christmas-dick-9162712.jpg?v=1763155224"},{"product_id":"bag-of-dicks-dick-confetti","title":"Bag of Dicks + Dick Confetti!","description":"\u003ch2 data-end=\"209\" data-start=\"138\"\u003eBag of Dicks + Dick Confetti – Because Just Candy Wasn’t Enough\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"336\" data-start=\"211\"\u003eYou could send a sweet card. You could send flowers. Hell, you could even Venmo them 20 bucks. But where’s the fun in that?\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"587\" data-start=\"338\"\u003eInstead, imagine this: They tear open a mystery package, out spills a colorful avalanche of \u003cstrong data-end=\"454\" data-start=\"430\"\u003edick-shaped confetti\u003c\/strong\u003e, and right there in the middle is a big ol’ bag of fruity gummy dicks with a note that proudly declares, \u003cstrong data-end=\"585\" data-start=\"560\"\u003e“Eat a Bag of Dicks.”\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"706\" data-start=\"589\"\u003eIt’s edible, it’s messy, it’s wildly inappropriate, and it’s the exact kind of prank gift that will live in infamy.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"858\" data-start=\"708\"\u003eIf you want to send something that’ll have them laughing, swearing, and still finding penis-shaped glitter in their carpet weeks later - this is it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"932\" data-start=\"860\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"930\" data-start=\"860\"\u003eStop overthinking. Send them a Bag of Dicks + Dick Confetti today.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"937\" data-start=\"934\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"969\" data-start=\"939\"\u003eWhy This Works Every Time\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1137\" data-start=\"971\"\u003eRegular gummy dicks? Hilarious.\u003cbr data-end=\"1005\" data-start=\"1002\"\u003eA bag of gummy dicks \u003cstrong data-end=\"1034\" data-start=\"1026\"\u003eplus\u003c\/strong\u003e hundreds of tiny penis confetti pieces that scatter everywhere like the glitter of shame? Legendary.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1175\" data-start=\"1139\"\u003eIt’s the ultimate two-punch combo:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003col data-end=\"1344\" data-start=\"1176\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1225\" data-start=\"1176\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1225\" data-start=\"1179\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1198\" data-start=\"1179\"\u003eImmediate laugh\u003c\/strong\u003e when they see the candy.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1344\" data-start=\"1226\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1344\" data-start=\"1229\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1248\" data-start=\"1229\"\u003eLingering chaos\u003c\/strong\u003e when they realize they’ll be finding confetti penises in their car, purse, or hair for weeks.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ol\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1401\" data-start=\"1346\"\u003eThis isn’t just a gag gift - it’s a whole experience.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"1406\" data-start=\"1403\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"1477\" data-start=\"1408\"\u003eA Birthday, Breakup, or “Just Because” Gift They’ll Never Forget\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1513\" data-start=\"1479\"\u003eHere’s how it usually goes down:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1842\" data-start=\"1515\"\u003eThey open the bag. Confetti explodes everywhere. They laugh, choke on their coffee, maybe call you names.\u003cbr data-end=\"1623\" data-start=\"1620\"\u003eThen they actually eat the gummies… and realize they’re not just funny, they’re delicious.\u003cbr data-end=\"1716\" data-start=\"1713\"\u003eFinally, they’re vacuuming their couch a week later and still finding little pink and gold dicks stuck between the cushions.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1944\" data-start=\"1844\"\u003eCongratulations - you just gave them a gift and a long-term reminder that you’re a lovable menace.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"1949\" data-start=\"1946\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"2001\" data-start=\"1951\"\u003eReal Reviews From People Who’ve Pulled It Off\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-end=\"2357\" data-start=\"2003\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2357\" data-start=\"2005\"\u003e“Made my boss turn 7 shades of red. Perfect!”\u003cbr data-end=\"2053\" data-start=\"2050\"\u003e“I sent them to my brother-in-law and his wife… they ate all of them in 5 minutes. Said they tasted amazing. Great gag gift!”\u003cbr data-end=\"2183\" data-start=\"2180\"\u003e“I love this company and every product! The bag of dicks makes for a great gift and laugh! All my friends have loved their delicious gummies and the surprise every time.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"2362\" data-start=\"2359\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"2405\" data-start=\"2364\"\u003eWhat’s in the Bag (and on the Floor)\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-end=\"2803\" data-start=\"2407\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2494\" data-start=\"2407\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2494\" data-start=\"2409\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2440\" data-start=\"2409\"\u003eA bag of fruity gummy dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e – sweet, chewy, and shaped for maximum awkwardness.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2584\" data-start=\"2495\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2584\" data-start=\"2497\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2534\" data-start=\"2497\"\u003eAn “Eat a Bag of Dicks” note card\u003c\/strong\u003e – direct, tasteful, classy. (Okay, not classy.)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2662\" data-start=\"2585\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2662\" data-start=\"2587\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2630\" data-start=\"2587\"\u003eA full envelope of dick-shaped confetti\u003c\/strong\u003e – the real MVP of this prank.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2724\" data-start=\"2663\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2724\" data-start=\"2665\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2685\" data-start=\"2665\"\u003eOptional add-ons\u003c\/strong\u003e for birthdays or extra prank damage.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2803\" data-start=\"2725\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2803\" data-start=\"2727\"\u003e100% anonymous shipping so you can sit back and enjoy the chaos from afar.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"2808\" data-start=\"2805\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"2827\" data-start=\"2810\"\u003ePerfect For…\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-end=\"3053\" data-start=\"2829\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2876\" data-start=\"2829\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2876\" data-start=\"2831\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2844\" data-start=\"2831\"\u003eBirthdays\u003c\/strong\u003e – skip the boring candle set.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2926\" data-start=\"2877\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2926\" data-start=\"2879\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2896\" data-start=\"2879\"\u003eRevenge gifts\u003c\/strong\u003e – sweet justice, literally.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"3013\" data-start=\"2927\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3013\" data-start=\"2929\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2962\" data-start=\"2929\"\u003eBachelor\/Bachelorette parties\u003c\/strong\u003e – give the bride or groom something to snack on.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"3053\" data-start=\"3014\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3053\" data-start=\"3016\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"3032\" data-start=\"3016\"\u003ePetty pranks\u003c\/strong\u003e – because you can.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"3058\" data-start=\"3055\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"3107\" data-start=\"3060\"\u003eHow to Send a Bag of Dicks + Dick Confetti\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003col data-end=\"3292\" data-start=\"3109\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"3134\" data-start=\"3109\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3134\" data-start=\"3112\"\u003eClick “Add to Cart.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"3191\" data-start=\"3135\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3191\" data-start=\"3138\"\u003eType in your victim’s… I mean, recipient’s address.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"3241\" data-start=\"3192\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3241\" data-start=\"3195\"\u003eDecide if you want to add extra prank flair.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"3292\" data-start=\"3242\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3292\" data-start=\"3245\"\u003eShip it anonymously and wait for the fallout.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ol\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"3297\" data-start=\"3294\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"3317\" data-start=\"3299\"\u003eThe Aftermath\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3407\" data-start=\"3319\"\u003eThis isn’t the type of gift they throw away and forget about. Nope. You’ve given them:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-end=\"3511\" data-start=\"3408\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"3441\" data-start=\"3408\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3441\" data-start=\"3410\"\u003eA snack they’ll actually eat.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"3475\" data-start=\"3442\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3475\" data-start=\"3444\"\u003eA mess they’ll curse you for.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"3511\" data-start=\"3476\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3511\" data-start=\"3478\"\u003eA story they’ll tell for years.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3665\" data-start=\"3513\"\u003eBecause honestly, anybody can send a box of chocolates. But only a true friend, sibling, or chaotic genius sends \u003cstrong data-end=\"3662\" data-start=\"3626\"\u003ea bag of dicks AND dick confetti\u003c\/strong\u003e.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"3670\" data-start=\"3667\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3870\" data-start=\"3672\"\u003e🎁 \u003cstrong data-end=\"3799\" data-start=\"3675\"\u003eClick “Add to Cart” now and send them a gift that’s part delicious treat, part nuclear glitter bomb of penis-shaped joy. \u003c\/strong\u003eThey’ll never see it coming… but they’ll sure as hell remember it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3870\" data-start=\"3672\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e Make sure you put the recipient's \u003cspan style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e and \u003cspan style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e in the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan size=\"4\"\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Dicks By Mail - Anonymously mail a bag of dicks","offers":[{"title":"---- \/ -----","offer_id":3969903001613,"sku":"BOD+GLITTER-DICK","price":20.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Happy Birthday DickHead Card! \/ Add a Second Bag of Dicks for 1\/2 Off!","offer_id":3969903034381,"sku":"BOD-2+GLITTER-DICK+BDAYDICKHEADCARD","price":27.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Happy Birthday (EAT A BAG OF DICKS) Card! \/ Add a Second Bag of Dicks for 1\/2 Off!","offer_id":3969903067149,"sku":"BOD-2+GLITTER-DICK+BDAYBODCARD","price":27.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Happy Birthday Box! \/ Add a Second Bag of Dicks for 1\/2 Off!","offer_id":3969903099917,"sku":"BOD-2+GLITTER-DICK+BDAYBUNDLEBOX","price":29.5,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"---- \/ Add a Second Bag of Dicks for 1\/2 Off!","offer_id":3969903132685,"sku":"BOD-2+GLITTER-DICK","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Happy Birthday DickHead Card! \/ -----","offer_id":3969903165453,"sku":"BOD+GLITTER-DICK+BDAYDICKHEADCARD","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Happy Birthday (EAT A BAG OF DICKS) Card! \/ -----","offer_id":3969903198221,"sku":"BOD+GLITTER-DICK+BDAYBODCARD","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Happy Birthday Box! \/ -----","offer_id":3969903230989,"sku":"BOD+GLITTER-DICK+BDAYBUNDLEBOX","price":25.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/bag-of-dicks-dick-confetti-4336620.jpg?v=1755879238"},{"product_id":"eat-shit-chocolate-shit-in-a-box","title":"Eat Shit - Chocolate Shit in a Box","description":"\u003ch2 data-start=\"263\" data-end=\"305\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"265\" data-end=\"303\"\u003eEat Shit – Chocolate Shit in a Box\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"306\" data-end=\"368\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cem data-start=\"306\" data-end=\"366\"\u003eFinally, a sweet way to tell someone exactly how you feel.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"370\" data-end=\"437\"\u003eSome gifts say “I love you.” This one says “Eat shit.” Literally.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"439\" data-end=\"701\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"439\" data-end=\"477\"\u003eEat Shit – Chocolate Shit in a Box\u003c\/strong\u003e is a realistic poop-shaped piece of premium milk chocolate, delivered straight to their door in a discreet box. It’s rich. It’s creamy. It’s hilarious. And it’s the perfect edible insult for when words just aren’t enough.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"703\" data-end=\"900\"\u003eNo boring gift cards. No predictable candy boxes. Just one beautifully molded chocolate turd that makes your point loud and clear… before they bite into it and realize it actually tastes amazing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"902\" data-end=\"1053\"\u003eSo quit sending flowers to people who deserve better (or worse). Click \u003cstrong data-start=\"973\" data-end=\"988\"\u003eAdd to Cart\u003c\/strong\u003e and make their day memorable, awkward, and surprisingly sweet.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1055\" data-end=\"1058\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1060\" data-end=\"1102\"\u003eWhy You Need to Send a Chocolate Turd\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1104\" data-end=\"1511\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1104\" data-end=\"1203\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1106\" data-end=\"1203\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1106\" data-end=\"1141\"\u003eIt’s the ultimate edible insult\u003c\/strong\u003e – Way funnier than a text and way tastier than actual shit.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1204\" data-end=\"1299\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1206\" data-end=\"1299\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1206\" data-end=\"1236\"\u003eIt’s 100 percent anonymous\u003c\/strong\u003e – No return address, no receipt, no way to prove it was you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1300\" data-end=\"1399\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1302\" data-end=\"1399\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1302\" data-end=\"1320\"\u003eIt’s delicious\u003c\/strong\u003e – Premium milk chocolate that’s so good, they’ll hate how much they love it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1400\" data-end=\"1511\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1402\" data-end=\"1511\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1402\" data-end=\"1437\"\u003eIt works for any petty occasion\u003c\/strong\u003e – Birthdays, breakups, revenge gifts, coworker roasts, or just because.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1513\" data-end=\"1516\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1518\" data-end=\"1548\"\u003eThe Scene You’re Creating\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1550\" data-end=\"1735\"\u003ePicture this: They get a package. No idea what it is. They open the box slowly. Inside, sitting in the middle like the crown jewel of comedy, is a perfectly molded \u003cstrong data-start=\"1714\" data-end=\"1732\"\u003echocolate shit\u003c\/strong\u003e.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1737\" data-end=\"1955\"\u003eAt first, confusion. Then laughter. Then the moment where they debate whether they should actually eat it. Spoiler – they will. Because it smells like chocolate. It looks like a prank, but tastes like a luxury treat.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1957\" data-end=\"2088\"\u003eAnd you? You’re somewhere else, living your best life, knowing you just dropped the funniest, pettiest gift they’ll ever receive.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2090\" data-end=\"2093\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2095\" data-end=\"2145\"\u003eReal Reviews from People Who Went Full Savage\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-start=\"2147\" data-end=\"2343\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2149\" data-end=\"2343\"\u003e“Excellent service and timing. Always love ordering from Dicks by Mail! Thank you!”\u003cbr data-start=\"2232\" data-end=\"2235\"\u003e“It was best surprise gift yet!!”\u003cbr data-start=\"2270\" data-end=\"2273\"\u003e“Recipient had tears from laughter and had to show everyone else!”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2345\" data-end=\"2348\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2350\" data-end=\"2374\"\u003eWhat You’re Getting\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2376\" data-end=\"2785\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2376\" data-end=\"2452\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2378\" data-end=\"2452\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2378\" data-end=\"2417\"\u003eOne realistic poop-shaped chocolate\u003c\/strong\u003e made with premium milk chocolate\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2453\" data-end=\"2533\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2455\" data-end=\"2533\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2455\" data-end=\"2466\"\u003eFlavor:\u003c\/strong\u003e Rich, creamy, and completely safe to eat (unlike the real thing)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2534\" data-end=\"2600\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2536\" data-end=\"2600\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2536\" data-end=\"2550\"\u003ePackaging:\u003c\/strong\u003e Discreet plain box with no branding or receipts\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2601\" data-end=\"2672\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2603\" data-end=\"2672\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2603\" data-end=\"2616\"\u003eDelivery:\u003c\/strong\u003e Ships completely anonymously for maximum prank impact\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2673\" data-end=\"2785\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2675\" data-end=\"2785\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2675\" data-end=\"2691\"\u003ePerfect For:\u003c\/strong\u003e Anonymous prank, revenge gift, breakup joke, birthday gag, coworker roast, adult humor gift\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2787\" data-end=\"2790\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2792\" data-end=\"2829\"\u003eWhy This Works Every Single Time\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2831\" data-end=\"3036\"\u003eBecause “Eat Shit” is one of the most universally understood insults on Earth. It works in every language, every situation, and now – thanks to this chocolate masterpiece – in every gift-giving scenario.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3038\" data-end=\"3304\"\u003eYou can send a chocolate turd to someone you love as a joke, or to someone you “love less” as a little payback. Either way, they’ll remember it. They’ll laugh. They might even post it online, giving you the satisfaction of knowing your gift is now internet famous.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3306\" data-end=\"3446\"\u003eAnd the kicker? Even if they think you’re the world’s biggest jerk, they’ll probably still eat it. Because good chocolate wins every time.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"3448\" data-end=\"3451\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"3453\" data-end=\"3490\"\u003eSend It. Own It. Laugh About It.\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3492\" data-end=\"3714\"\u003eRight now, someone in your life deserves to hear the words “Eat Shit.” But instead of saying it, you could mail it – wrapped in delicious milk chocolate, sitting in a box, ready to be the funniest gift they get all year.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3716\" data-end=\"3811\"\u003eClick \u003cstrong data-start=\"3722\" data-end=\"3737\"\u003eAdd to Cart\u003c\/strong\u003e. Send \u003cstrong data-start=\"3744\" data-end=\"3782\"\u003eEat Shit – Chocolate Shit in a Box\u003c\/strong\u003e.\u003cbr data-start=\"3783\" data-end=\"3786\"\u003eWatch the chaos unfold.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3716\" data-end=\"3811\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e Make sure you put the recipient's \u003cspan\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e and \u003cspan\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e in the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan size=\"4\"\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"DickAtYourDoor","offers":[{"title":"Eat Shit","offer_id":4087999627277,"sku":"ES","price":15.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Double Shits (Save 10%)","offer_id":42649698631764,"sku":"ES2","price":28.78,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Triple Shits (Save 20%)","offer_id":42649698664532,"sku":"ES3","price":38.37,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/products\/the-poop-prank-bundle-6034126.jpg?v=1762196781"},{"product_id":"valentines-day-pack","title":"Valentine’s Day Pack: Gummy Bag of Dicks, Pop-Up Dick Card, and Optional Dick Confetti","description":"\u003ch3\u003eValentine’s Day Pack: Gummy Bag of Dicks, Pop-Up Dick Card, and Optional Glitter or Confetti 🍬💌✨\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis Valentine’s Day, ditch the boring gifts and send something unforgettable (and slightly inappropriate). The \u003cstrong\u003eValentine’s Day Pack\u003c\/strong\u003e has everything you need to bring laughter, sass, and maybe just a little chaos to someone’s day. It’s packed with \u003cstrong\u003edelicious gummy dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e, a \u003cstrong\u003epop-up dick card\u003c\/strong\u003e, and the option to sprinkle in \u003cstrong\u003eglitter or dick confetti\u003c\/strong\u003e for good measure.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat’s Inside:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003e🍬 \u003cstrong\u003e\"I Thought You Could Use Some Dick\" Gummy Bag of Dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e – Sweet, fruity, and ridiculously hilarious, these \u003cstrong\u003edelicious gummy dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e are guaranteed to make anyone laugh (and snack happily).\u003cbr\u003e💌 \u003cstrong\u003eValentine's Day Pop-Up Dick Card\u003c\/strong\u003e – A bold, cheeky card that literally pops up to tell them to eat a dick, but in the cutest way possible.\u003cbr\u003e✨ \u003cstrong\u003eOptional Glitter or Dick Confetti\u003c\/strong\u003e – Because nothing says “I care” like glitter in places they’ll be finding for months.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhy It’s the Perfect Valentine’s Day Gift:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003col\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eGive Your Galentine Some Dick (You Knew They Were Missing)\u003c\/strong\u003e – Show your bestie you’re looking out for them. After all, every Galentine deserves a little extra love… in gummy form.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eTell Your Boyfriend or Girlfriend There’s More Dick Coming\u003c\/strong\u003e – The pop-up card and \u003cstrong\u003egummy dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e are just the start. Consider it a teaser for what’s to come later.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eConfuse the Shit Out of Someone Anonymously\u003c\/strong\u003e – Send this to a friend, crush, or coworker, and let them wonder if “eat a dick” is a compliment or an insult. (It’s both.)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eTell Your Asshole Ex to Eat a Dick\u003c\/strong\u003e – Because closure tastes sweeter when it’s shaped like a gummy penis.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ol\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhy They’ll Love It (Even If They Hate It):\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eThe \u003cstrong\u003egummy dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e are \u003cstrong\u003edeliciously fruity\u003c\/strong\u003e, making them the perfect snack (and subtle roast).\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eThe pop-up card is bold enough to say what you’re thinking but cute enough to soften the blow.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eOptional glitter or \u003cstrong\u003edick-shaped confetti\u003c\/strong\u003e ensures they’ll be talking about this gift long after Valentine’s Day.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis \u003cstrong\u003eheart gift box for her, him, or anyone\u003c\/strong\u003e is your one-stop shop for laughter, awkwardness, and unforgettable memories. Whether it’s for your \u003cstrong\u003egirlfriend\u003c\/strong\u003e, \u003cstrong\u003eboyfriend\u003c\/strong\u003e, \u003cstrong\u003eGalentine\u003c\/strong\u003e, or that \u003cstrong\u003eex who really deserves it\u003c\/strong\u003e, the \u003cstrong\u003eValentine’s Day Pack\u003c\/strong\u003e is here to bring the fun.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSo, go ahead—spread some joy, send some sass, and give someone the sweetest sack of dicks they’ll ever receive. 💌✨🍬\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e Make sure you put the recipient's \u003cspan style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e and \u003cspan style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e in the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan size=\"4\"\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Dicks By Mail - Anonymously mail a bag of dicks","offers":[{"title":"----- \/ -----","offer_id":21425316134996,"sku":"","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Add Glitter \/ -----","offer_id":21425316167764,"sku":"","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Add Dick Confetti \/ -----","offer_id":21425316200532,"sku":"","price":30.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Add Glitter \/ Add a Second Bag of Dicks for 1\/2 Off!","offer_id":21425316233300,"sku":"","price":36.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Add Dick Confetti \/ Add a Second Bag of Dicks for 1\/2 Off!","offer_id":21425316266068,"sku":"","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"----- \/ Add a Second Bag of Dicks for 1\/2 Off!","offer_id":21425316298836,"sku":"","price":31.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/go-f-yourself-valentines-day-pack-2999489.jpg?v=1755878740"},{"product_id":"eat-my-ass-chocolate-buttholes-a-valentines-treat","title":"Eat Ass Chocolate Buttholes - A Sweet Treat","description":"\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eEat Ass Chocolate Buttholes – A Sweet Treat\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eBecause sometimes the best way to say “I love you” is with a box of edible asses.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eMove over heart-shaped chocolates, there’s a new Valentine’s Day MVP in town – \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eEat Ass Chocolate Buttholes\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e. These handcrafted milk chocolate masterpieces are molded into the most realistic little starfish you’ve ever seen. They’re sweet, cheeky, and guaranteed to get the kind of reaction no boring candy box could ever pull off.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eYou don’t just give these as a gift. You make a statement. That statement? “Here’s some sweet ass, literally.” And the best part – it ships in a discreet box, 100 percent anonymous, so your friend, lover, or mortal enemy won’t know whether to laugh, blush, or eat them immediately.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSo quit being predictable. Forget roses, forget cards. Click \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eAdd to Cart\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e and send someone the gift of chocolate buttholes today.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWhy You Absolutely Need to Gift Chocolate Assholes\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt’s the funniest edible gift ever\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e – The shock factor alone is worth the price.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt’s actually delicious\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e – Rich, creamy milk chocolate that melts in your mouth like… well, you get the idea.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt’s perfect for every dirty-minded occasion\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e – Valentine’s Day, birthdays, bachelorette parties, or “just because.”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt ships anonymously\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e – You can send a box of sweet assholes and take the secret to your grave.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe Scene You’re Creating\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePicture it: Valentine’s Day morning. They open a discreet little box. Inside? Not truffles. Not caramel clusters. Nope – a dozen perfect little \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003echocolate buttholes\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e staring up at them like a naughty surprise from Cupid himself.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThey laugh. They gasp. They grab their phone to send a pic to their friends. And then, after the laughter dies down, they take a bite… and realize these are actually \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eamazing\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e. Rich, velvety chocolate that melts over their tongue in the most sinful way possible.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eAnd just like that, you’ve taken gift-giving from “meh” to “memorable” in 0.5 seconds.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eReal Reviews from People Who Aren’t Afraid to Eat Ass\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e“Absolute Valentines Day hit! Boyfriend got a good laugh and ate some good chocolate starfish 🤣”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e “These were great! It was a gift to a friend of mine – who has received some of your other items as well! – and she loved it. Also said the chocolate was excellent. Thanks for being awesome!”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e “Eat my ass chocolate buttholes, where do I even start? Is a sweet treat indeed. These decadent chocolate buttholes effortlessly melt all over your mouth and tongue in the creamiest of ways as you devour them. Very little in life will satisfy you as much as these butt holes can. Do yourself a favor and gift that special man in your life some of these!”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWhat You’re Getting\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eHandcrafted milk chocolate buttholes\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e made with creamy, high-quality ingredients\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eRealistic detail\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e that makes them hilariously lifelike\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eFlavor:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Sweet, rich, melt-in-your-mouth goodness\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePackaging:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Discreet box with no branding or receipts\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDelivery:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Ships 100 percent anonymously\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePerfect For:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Valentine’s Day gift, birthday gag, anonymous prank, bachelor or bachelorette party, edible joke, funny surprise for friends or partners\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWhy This Works Every Time\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBecause nobody forgets the moment they’re handed a box of edible assholes. It’s the perfect mix of dirty humor and actual gourmet candy. It’s a conversation starter, a photo-worthy moment, and a delicious snack all rolled into one.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eEven the people who act fake-offended will try one. And when they do, they’ll find out these aren’t just a gag – they’re seriously good chocolate.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSend Sweet Ass Today\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eRight now, there’s someone in your life who could use a laugh, a shock, and maybe a mouthful of milk chocolate butthole. You know exactly who they are.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eClick  \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eAdd to Cart\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e. Send \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eEat Ass Chocolate Buttholes\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Make them smile, make them blush, and give them the sweetest ass they’ve ever had.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e Make sure you put the recipient's \u003cspan\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e and \u003cspan\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e in the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan size=\"4\"\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"DicksByMail","offers":[{"title":"One Box \/ Standard","offer_id":41815492427860,"sku":"EMA","price":17.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"One Box \/ Live Fast Box Sleeve","offer_id":41815492460628,"sku":"EMA,LIVEFASTSLEEVE","price":17.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Double (10% Off Single Price per Box) \/ Standard","offer_id":46879846793300,"sku":"EMA-2","price":31.48,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Double (10% Off Single Price per Box) \/ Live Fast Box Sleeve","offer_id":46879846826068,"sku":"EMA-2,LIVEFASTSLEEVE-2","price":32.38,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Triple (20% Off Single Price per Box) \/ Standard","offer_id":46879846858836,"sku":"EMA-3","price":41.8,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Triple (20% Off Single Price per Box) \/ Live Fast Box Sleeve","offer_id":46879846891604,"sku":"EMA-3,LIVEFASTSLEEVE-3","price":43.18,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Five (25% Off Single Price per Box) \/ Standard","offer_id":46879846924372,"sku":"EMA-5","price":65.59,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Five (25% Off Single Price per Box) \/ Live Fast Box Sleeve","offer_id":46879846957140,"sku":"EMA-5,LIVEFASTSLEEVE-5","price":67.46,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ten (30% Off Single Price per Box) \/ Standard","offer_id":46879846989908,"sku":"EMA-10","price":122.43,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ten (30% Off Single Price per Box) \/ Live Fast Box Sleeve","offer_id":46879847022676,"sku":"EMA-10,LIVEFASTSLEEVE-10","price":125.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/eat-ass-chocolate-i-thought-you-could-use-some-dick-gummies-6008730.jpg?v=1755878736"},{"product_id":"just-for-you-the-never-ending-card-from-hell","title":"Just For You - The Never Ending Card from Hell","description":"\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"322\" data-start=\"268\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"320\" data-start=\"270\"\u003eJust For You – The Never Ending Card from Hell\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"422\" data-start=\"323\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cem data-end=\"420\" data-start=\"323\"\u003eBecause sometimes a “Happy Birthday” just isn’t enough. You want to ruin their whole afternoon.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"722\" data-start=\"424\"\u003eThis isn’t just a greeting card. This is a weapon. A psychological prank disguised as a thoughtful gesture. The \u003cstrong data-end=\"582\" data-start=\"536\"\u003eJust For You – Never Ending Card from Hell\u003c\/strong\u003e looks innocent enough… until they open it. Then the moaning starts. Loud, awkward, completely unignorable moaning that goes on for hours.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"954\" data-start=\"724\"\u003eThey’ll try to close it. Nope.\u003cbr data-end=\"757\" data-start=\"754\"\u003eThey’ll try to hide it. Good luck.\u003cbr data-end=\"794\" data-start=\"791\"\u003eEventually, they’ll rip it open in frustration. That’s when the hidden \u003cstrong data-end=\"881\" data-start=\"865\"\u003eglitter bomb\u003c\/strong\u003e goes off, covering them and everything they love in shiny humiliation.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1092\" data-start=\"956\"\u003eIt’s brutal. It’s petty. It’s perfect. And it ships 100 percent anonymously so you can inflict pure chaos without ever getting caught.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1275\" data-start=\"1094\"\u003eSo if you’ve got a birthday, bachelor party, office gag, or revenge opportunity coming up, smash \u003cstrong data-end=\"1206\" data-start=\"1191\"\u003eAdd to Cart\u003c\/strong\u003e and prepare to ruin their day in the most satisfying way possible.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"1280\" data-start=\"1277\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"1320\" data-start=\"1282\"\u003eWhy This Card Is Pure Evil Genius\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-end=\"1619\" data-start=\"1322\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1388\" data-start=\"1322\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1388\" data-start=\"1324\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1348\" data-start=\"1324\"\u003eNever-ending torture\u003c\/strong\u003e – Moans for up to four hours straight\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1462\" data-start=\"1389\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1462\" data-start=\"1391\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1406\" data-start=\"1391\"\u003eUnstoppable\u003c\/strong\u003e – Closing it doesn’t work, smashing it makes it worse\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1556\" data-start=\"1463\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1556\" data-start=\"1465\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1492\" data-start=\"1465\"\u003eThe glitter bomb finale\u003c\/strong\u003e – The ultimate “screw you” moment when they think they’ve won\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1619\" data-start=\"1557\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1619\" data-start=\"1559\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1581\" data-start=\"1559\"\u003eAnonymous delivery\u003c\/strong\u003e – You get the laughs, not the blame\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"1624\" data-start=\"1621\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"1656\" data-start=\"1626\"\u003eThe Scene You’re Creating\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1821\" data-start=\"1658\"\u003ePicture it. They get a card in the mail. They open it in front of co-workers, family, or a crowded party. Immediately, loud, over-the-top moaning fills the room.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1971\" data-start=\"1823\"\u003eThey panic. They try shutting it. Nope. They shove it in a drawer. Still moaning. They’re sweating now. Finally, in desperation, they rip it open.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2108\" data-start=\"1973\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1982\" data-start=\"1973\"\u003eBOOM.\u003c\/strong\u003e Glitter everywhere. In their hair. In their drink. In their carpet forever. The moaning stops, but the shame sticks around.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2198\" data-start=\"2110\"\u003eAnd you? You’re somewhere else, sipping a beer, laughing like the evil genius you are.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"2203\" data-start=\"2200\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"2252\" data-start=\"2205\"\u003eReal Reviews from People Who Pulled It Off\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-end=\"2904\" data-start=\"2254\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2904\" data-start=\"2256\"\u003e“It was absolutely brilliant! He’s a mechanic and opened it up in front of a shop full of mechanics and of course it wouldn’t stop moaning 🤣. So of course he went for the battery and his bay and himself ended up covered in glitter. He actually said that it was awesome and totally made his day!”\u003cbr data-end=\"2555\" data-start=\"2552\"\u003e“This is freaking genius! Kudos to whoever came up with this idea. My friend opened the card and it started making the odd noises, he tried closing it and it still wouldn’t stop.”\u003cbr data-end=\"2739\" data-start=\"2736\"\u003e“Worked perfectly. Buddy opened it in his office with two women present and started making noises, had to run out trying to muffle it and destroy it to stop it.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"2909\" data-start=\"2906\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"2935\" data-start=\"2911\"\u003eWhat You’re Getting\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-end=\"3441\" data-start=\"2937\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"3004\" data-start=\"2937\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3004\" data-start=\"2939\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2969\" data-start=\"2939\"\u003eHigh-quality greeting card\u003c\/strong\u003e with a hidden moaning sound chip\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"3069\" data-start=\"3005\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3069\" data-start=\"3007\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"3020\" data-start=\"3007\"\u003eRun time:\u003c\/strong\u003e Up to four hours of uninterrupted loud moaning\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"3126\" data-start=\"3070\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3126\" data-start=\"3072\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"3097\" data-start=\"3072\"\u003eGlitter bomb surprise\u003c\/strong\u003e triggered when ripped open\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"3186\" data-start=\"3127\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3186\" data-start=\"3129\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"3147\" data-start=\"3129\"\u003eCustomization:\u003c\/strong\u003e Optional personalized message inside\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"3241\" data-start=\"3187\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3241\" data-start=\"3189\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"3212\" data-start=\"3189\"\u003eActivation Options:\u003c\/strong\u003e Activated or Not Activated\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"3308\" data-start=\"3242\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3308\" data-start=\"3244\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"3266\" data-start=\"3244\"\u003eAnonymous shipping\u003c\/strong\u003e – No sender info, no receipts, no trace\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"3441\" data-start=\"3309\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3441\" data-start=\"3311\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"3327\" data-start=\"3311\"\u003ePerfect For:\u003c\/strong\u003e Birthday prank, office gag, bachelor party joke, revenge card, funny surprise for friends, anonymous prank gift\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"3446\" data-start=\"3443\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"3483\" data-start=\"3448\"\u003eWhy It Works Every Single Time\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3704\" data-start=\"3485\"\u003eBecause it’s a prank that forces them into an escalating nightmare. The card is funny when they first open it. Then it’s frustrating. Then it’s panic-inducing. And then, just when they think they’ve won, glitter hell.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3936\" data-start=\"3706\"\u003eIt’s the kind of prank that becomes a story. A “remember when” moment that gets retold at every party. And whether they love you or hate you for it, they’ll never forget who sent it… or at least they’ll never know if it was you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"3941\" data-start=\"3938\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"3990\" data-start=\"3943\"\u003eBe the Legend of Their Worst Birthday Ever\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"4133\" data-start=\"3992\"\u003eDon’t just sign your name in a card. Sign your prank into history. The \u003cstrong data-end=\"4094\" data-start=\"4063\"\u003eNever Ending Card from Hell\u003c\/strong\u003e is your ticket to prank immortality.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"4275\" data-start=\"4135\"\u003eClick \u003cstrong data-end=\"4156\" data-start=\"4141\"\u003eAdd to Cart\u003c\/strong\u003e. Send it. Sit back. And enjoy knowing they’ll be finding glitter in their couch cushions for the next three years.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"DickAtYourDoor","offers":[{"title":"Activated","offer_id":41569588346964,"sku":"JFY-8","price":13.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Not Activated","offer_id":41569588379732,"sku":"JFY","price":13.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/eat-ass-chocolate-moaning-sex-noises-card-i-thought-you-could-use-some-dick-gummies-3253217.jpg?v=1755878737"},{"product_id":"nuts-about-you-singing-card","title":"Nuts About You - The Endless Singing Card","description":"\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"125\" data-end=\"199\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eNuts About You - The Endless Singing Card\u003c\/strong\u003e That Won’t Shut the Hell Up\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"201\" data-end=\"437\"\u003eYou know what’s better than a card that says “I love you”? A card that makes them regret they ever met you. Meet the \u003cstrong data-start=\"318\" data-end=\"359\"\u003eNuts About You - Endless Singing Card\u003c\/strong\u003e, the romantic prank that’s basically Cupid with a megaphone and zero chill.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"439\" data-end=\"822\"\u003eThis bad boy doesn’t just sing. It \u003cem data-start=\"474\" data-end=\"486\"\u003ewon’t stop\u003c\/em\u003e singing. For up to four long, painful, hysterical hours, it blasts “The Bad Touch” by Bloodhound Gang on loop until your target either loses their mind or finds a way to destroy it. And guess what? If they try to kill it, the real fun begins. \u003cstrong data-start=\"730\" data-end=\"748\"\u003eHidden glitter\u003c\/strong\u003e will explode everywhere like a fabulous middle finger from you to them.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"824\" data-end=\"986\"\u003eSo yeah, if you’re ready to give someone a Valentine’s Day, birthday, or breakup they’ll never forget, \u003cstrong data-start=\"927\" data-end=\"983\"\u003eclick Add to Cart and ruin their peace of mind today\u003c\/strong\u003e.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"988\" data-end=\"991\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"993\" data-end=\"1048\"\u003eWhy This Is the Most Diabolical Singing Card Ever\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1049\" data-end=\"1224\"\u003eHallmark could never. This isn’t some sweet little jingle that fades out after 15 seconds. This is four hours of musical torture wrapped in a shiny little Valentine package.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1226\" data-end=\"1532\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1226\" data-end=\"1284\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1228\" data-end=\"1284\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1228\" data-end=\"1244\"\u003eEndless loop\u003c\/strong\u003e of “The Bad Touch” by Bloodhound Gang\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1285\" data-end=\"1358\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1287\" data-end=\"1358\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1287\" data-end=\"1312\"\u003eBuilt-in glitter trap\u003c\/strong\u003e for when they finally snap and rip it apart\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1359\" data-end=\"1449\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1361\" data-end=\"1449\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1361\" data-end=\"1383\"\u003eShips in safe mode\u003c\/strong\u003e so you can write your heartfelt message before you unleash hell\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1450\" data-end=\"1532\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1452\" data-end=\"1532\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1452\" data-end=\"1479\"\u003e100% anonymous delivery\u003c\/strong\u003e so you can watch from the shadows like a prank god\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1534\" data-end=\"1651\"\u003eThis card is equal parts sweet and savage. It says, “I care about you… but I also want to see you suffer a little.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1653\" data-end=\"1656\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"1658\" data-end=\"1687\"\u003eHow the Prank Plays Out\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1688\" data-end=\"2010\"\u003eThey open it. The music starts. They laugh. They think it’s cute. Thirty minutes later, they’re side-eyeing it. An hour later, they’re shouting over it. Two hours in, they’re pacing like they’re in a hostage situation. Finally, when they can’t take it anymore, they rip it in half and that’s when the glitter storm hits.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2012\" data-end=\"2071\"\u003eCongratulations. You just made them remember you forever.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2073\" data-end=\"2076\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"2078\" data-end=\"2099\"\u003eProduct Details\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2100\" data-end=\"2495\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2100\" data-end=\"2169\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2102\" data-end=\"2169\"\u003eFolded greeting card featuring “The Bad Touch” on an endless loop\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2170\" data-end=\"2220\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2172\" data-end=\"2220\"\u003ePlays for up to 4 hours straight without mercy\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2221\" data-end=\"2278\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2223\" data-end=\"2278\"\u003eHidden glitter that explodes if the card is destroyed\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2279\" data-end=\"2339\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2281\" data-end=\"2339\"\u003eShips in safe mode for message writing before activation\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2340\" data-end=\"2366\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2342\" data-end=\"2366\"\u003eShips 100% anonymously\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2367\" data-end=\"2495\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2369\" data-end=\"2495\"\u003ePerfect for: Valentine’s Day prank, romantic joke, anonymous surprise, breakup revenge, birthday gag, glitter explosion card\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2497\" data-end=\"2500\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"2502\" data-end=\"2538\"\u003eExpert Tips for Maximum Damage\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2539\" data-end=\"2742\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2539\" data-end=\"2608\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2541\" data-end=\"2608\"\u003eTime delivery for a date night so they’re stuck with it in public\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2609\" data-end=\"2676\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2611\" data-end=\"2676\"\u003eSlip it in with an actual gift so they think you’re being sweet\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2677\" data-end=\"2742\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2679\" data-end=\"2742\"\u003eAdd a heartfelt love note so the glitter betrayal hits harder\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2744\" data-end=\"2747\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"2749\" data-end=\"2765\"\u003eFinal Word\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2766\" data-end=\"3046\"\u003eThe \u003cstrong data-start=\"2770\" data-end=\"2811\"\u003eNuts About You - Endless Singing Card\u003c\/strong\u003e isn’t just a prank. It’s a performance. A slow-burn masterpiece of annoyance that ends with a sparkling explosion of chaos. Whether you’re wooing your partner with humor or serving cold glittery revenge, this card gets the job done.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3048\" data-end=\"3211\"\u003eSo, what are you waiting for? \u003cstrong data-start=\"3078\" data-end=\"3099\"\u003eClick Add to Cart\u003c\/strong\u003e, send it, and prepare to bask in the glorious texts, phone calls, and profanity-laced voicemails that follow.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3048\" data-end=\"3211\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e \u003c\/strong\u003eMake sure you put the recipient's \u003cspan\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003eand\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003ei\u003cwbr\u003en the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/wbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan size=\"4\"\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"DickAtYourDoor","offers":[{"title":"Activated","offer_id":41569588838484,"sku":"NUTS23","price":10.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Not Activated","offer_id":41569588871252,"sku":"NUTS24","price":10.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/nuts-about-you-the-endless-singing-card-9215365.jpg?v=1755878845"},{"product_id":"christmas-bag-of-d-cks-funny-gummies","title":"Christmas Bag of Dicks","description":"\u003ch3 dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eChristmas Bag of Dicks\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThe holiday spirit just got a whole lot dirtier.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eForget cookies, carols, and cinnamon-scented candles. The real way to spread Christmas cheer is to send someone a \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eChristmas Bag of Dicks\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e and watch their wholesome holiday spirit explode into shock, laughter, and maybe a little blushing.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThis is not your typical stocking stuffer. It’s a \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003elimited edition Christmas-themed bag\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e packed with 10 deliciously chewy, perfectly inappropriate gummy dicks in festive red and green. Five red, five green, each 2.5 inches long, each screaming “Merry Dickmas” in the most edible way possible.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eAnd yes, they actually taste amazing. So while your gift might start as a crude joke, it will probably end with someone proudly munching on a cherry or green apple gummy penis in front of the Christmas tree.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIf that mental image alone doesn’t make you smash the Add to Cart button, you might be dead inside.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003e\u003cb\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWhy You Should Absolutely Send a Christmas Bag of Dicks\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt’s the ultimate Christmas gag gift\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e – way funnier than another “World’s Best Dad” mug.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt’s the perfect stocking stuffer\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e – imagine your aunt pulling out a bag of gummy dicks in front of the whole family.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt’s versatile\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e – works for white elephant, secret Santa, family pranks, or your “holiday party” that got out of hand.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt ships 100% anonymously\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e – no one will know it was you unless you crack and spill the beans.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003e\u003cb\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThe Scene You’re Creating\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eIt’s Christmas morning. Someone tears open a festive little package. They expect candy canes, maybe a chocolate Santa. Instead, they’re holding a \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003ebag of gummy dicks\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e. Red. Green. Proudly 2.5 inches each.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eLaughter erupts. Grandma nearly chokes on her coffee. Your cousin pulls out their phone to film the chaos. And somewhere, you’re sitting back, sipping eggnog, and grinning like the Grinch after stealing all the gifts.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThis is not just candy. This is an edible punchline.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003e\u003cb\u003e\u003cspan\u003eReal Reviews from Real Degenerates\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e“I had just received this! I LOVE it. I go around all time telling people eat a bag of dicks.. lol so much so when I got them my 14 year old went ‘but that’s your joke’ lol I still haven’t figured out who sent them but they need a high five and some praise!! Thank you for making such a amazing gift!!”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e “Great white elephant gift.”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e “My friend blushed so much! It was perfect. She said the gummy candy tasted really good.”\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003e\u003cb\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWhat You’re Getting\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eCandy Count:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e 10 gummies - 5 red, 5 green\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSize:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e 2.5 inches each (size matters)\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eFlavors:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Cherry and green apple\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePackaging:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Limited edition Christmas-themed bag\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eOrder Options:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Single, double em, three, four, five, six for the whole family, eight, ten for grandma too, fifteen for all the cousins, twenty for when you’re feeling generous\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli dir=\"ltr\" aria-level=\"1\"\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\" role=\"presentation\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDelivery:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e 100% anonymous for maximum mischief\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003e\u003cb\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWhy This Works Every Single Time\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eBecause Christmas is already a circus of weird traditions, awkward family moments, and questionable gifts. A \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eChristmas Bag of Dicks\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e slides right into the mix perfectly. It’s shocking, hilarious, and actually edible.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eEven the people who pretend to be offended will sneak one when no one’s looking. And unlike boring candy canes, no one will forget who sent it.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch2\u003e\u003cb\u003e\u003cspan\u003eDo It. You Know You Want To.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eRight now, there’s a stocking hanging somewhere that desperately needs a \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003ebag of gummy dicks\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e inside it. It could be your brother’s. Your best friend’s. Your white elephant victim’s.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cb id=\"docs-internal-guid-2b64ee3c-7fff-5570-2d50-d1a4a83b8b26\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003eSo click Add to Cart.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Send a \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eChristmas Bag of Dicks\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e And make sure this holiday season is one they’ll never forget.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e If you are sending to someone else make sure you put the recipient's \u003cspan style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e and \u003cspan style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e in the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan size=\"4\"\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Dicks By Mail","offers":[{"title":"Single","offer_id":41614441250900,"sku":"CHRISTMASBOD-1","price":15.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Double em!","offer_id":41614441283668,"sku":"CHRISTMASBOD-2","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Three","offer_id":41614441316436,"sku":"CHRISTMASBOD-3","price":41.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Five - for the whole family","offer_id":41614441381972,"sku":"CHRISTMASBOD-5","price":64.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Ten - Grandma gets one too","offer_id":41614441480276,"sku":"CHRISTMASBOD-10","price":99.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Fifteen - All the Cousins","offer_id":41614441513044,"sku":"CHRISTMASBOD-15","price":149.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Twenty - We're getting the whole office","offer_id":41614441545812,"sku":"CHRISTMASBOD-20","price":179.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/christmas-bag-of-dicks-2051179.png?v=1770741836"},{"product_id":"gummy-chocolate-bundle","title":"Gummy + Chocolate Bundle","description":"\u003ch2 data-start=\"215\" data-end=\"275\"\u003eGummy Dicks + Chocolate Cock = The Sweetest F-U Imaginable\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"277\" data-end=\"450\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"277\" data-end=\"450\"\u003eWhat’s better than sending someone a bag of dicks? Sending them TWO kinds. One soft and chewy. The other hard and melts in your mouth. Just like their last relationship.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"452\" data-end=\"632\"\u003eLook, some gifts are thoughtful. This one is not. This one is savage, petty, funny as hell, and perfectly packaged to say “Hey, I’m thinking of you... and it involves candy dicks.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"634\" data-end=\"1006\"\u003eWhether you’re trying to prank your best friend, drop a not-so-subtle hint to your ex, or just be the MVP of your next adult party, the \u003cstrong data-start=\"770\" data-end=\"798\"\u003eGummy + Chocolate Bundle\u003c\/strong\u003e is the nuclear option of \u003cstrong data-start=\"824\" data-end=\"843\"\u003egag candy gifts\u003c\/strong\u003e. This ain't your average \u003cstrong data-start=\"869\" data-end=\"887\"\u003ecandy gift box\u003c\/strong\u003e - it’s a sugar-coated insult delivered straight to their door. Anonymously, of course. Because we’re classy like that.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1008\" data-end=\"1075\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1008\" data-end=\"1075\"\u003eBuy now and ruin their diet and dignity in one glorious bundle.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1077\" data-end=\"1080\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1082\" data-end=\"1141\"\u003eWhy This Bundle Slaps Harder Than Their Last Tinder Date\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1143\" data-end=\"1263\"\u003eBecause giving someone regular candy is basic. Giving them a \u003cstrong data-start=\"1204\" data-end=\"1232\"\u003egummy and chocolate gift\u003c\/strong\u003e shaped like dicks? That’s art.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1265\" data-end=\"1582\"\u003eWe’ve combined two heavy hitters in the edible insult game. First, a luscious, 5-inch chocolate penis handcrafted with organic Peruvian cacao. Yeah, that’s right. Organic. Because even your revenge deserves high standards. Then we toss in a sack of gummy dicks so they can chew slowly and question their life choices.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1584\" data-end=\"1710\"\u003eThis \u003cstrong data-start=\"1589\" data-end=\"1611\"\u003efunny candy bundle\u003c\/strong\u003e hits the perfect balance between sweet and savage - like an edible middle finger wrapped in sugar.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1712\" data-end=\"1715\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1717\" data-end=\"1756\"\u003eUnbox the Burn: What They’re Getting\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1758\" data-end=\"1852\"\u003eThis \u003cstrong data-start=\"1763\" data-end=\"1785\"\u003enovelty candy gift\u003c\/strong\u003e ain’t just for laughs. It’s weirdly gourmet. Here’s what’s inside:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1854\" data-end=\"2271\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1854\" data-end=\"1949\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1856\" data-end=\"1949\"\u003eOne thick-ass, 5-inch long, 4-ounce chocolate penis made from high-end organic Peruvian cacao\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1950\" data-end=\"2024\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1952\" data-end=\"2024\"\u003eA generous bag of fruity \u003cstrong data-start=\"1977\" data-end=\"1992\"\u003egummy dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e, colorful and chewy like regret\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2025\" data-end=\"2104\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2027\" data-end=\"2104\"\u003eEntire thing is \u003cstrong data-start=\"2043\" data-end=\"2058\"\u003egluten free\u003c\/strong\u003e and \u003cstrong data-start=\"2063\" data-end=\"2075\"\u003enut free\u003c\/strong\u003e (but still wildly offensive)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2105\" data-end=\"2183\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2107\" data-end=\"2183\"\u003eComes packaged as a \u003cstrong data-start=\"2127\" data-end=\"2154\"\u003ecandy bundle for adults\u003c\/strong\u003e who deserve better… or worse\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2184\" data-end=\"2271\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2186\" data-end=\"2271\"\u003eShips \u003cstrong data-start=\"2192\" data-end=\"2219\"\u003e100 percent anonymously\u003c\/strong\u003e, because you’re not a monster, just chaotic neutral\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2273\" data-end=\"2414\"\u003eYou can’t go wrong with this \u003cstrong data-start=\"2302\" data-end=\"2329\"\u003echocolate and gummy set\u003c\/strong\u003e. Unless your grandma opens it. In that case, you’re gonna have a weird Thanksgiving.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2416\" data-end=\"2419\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2421\" data-end=\"2461\"\u003eWhen to Deploy the Sugar-Cocked Chaos\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2463\" data-end=\"2509\"\u003eHere’s when this \u003cstrong data-start=\"2480\" data-end=\"2501\"\u003eedible prank gift\u003c\/strong\u003e shines:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2511\" data-end=\"2764\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2511\" data-end=\"2555\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2513\" data-end=\"2555\"\u003eBreakup? Boom. Here’s your farewell snack.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2556\" data-end=\"2598\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2558\" data-end=\"2598\"\u003eBirthday? Skip the balloons. Send dicks.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2599\" data-end=\"2660\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2601\" data-end=\"2660\"\u003eBachelor or bachelorette party? You just became the legend.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2661\" data-end=\"2706\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2663\" data-end=\"2706\"\u003eSecret Santa? Not so secret anymore, Karen.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2707\" data-end=\"2764\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2709\" data-end=\"2764\"\u003eJust because you woke up and chose violence? Hell yeah.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2766\" data-end=\"2934\"\u003eThis isn’t just a \u003cstrong data-start=\"2784\" data-end=\"2809\"\u003eunique candy gift box\u003c\/strong\u003e, it’s an entire experience. One that leaves a taste in their mouth they won’t forget. Probably chocolate. Possibly betrayal.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2936\" data-end=\"2939\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2941\" data-end=\"2969\"\u003eYour Move, Candy Assassin\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2971\" data-end=\"3154\"\u003eReady to be the hero no one asked for? Smash that add to cart button. We’ll ship this savage sweetness straight to your victim - I mean recipient - without your name anywhere near it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3156\" data-end=\"3242\"\u003eBecause sometimes the best kind of love... tastes like chocolate cock and gummy balls.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"3244\" data-end=\"3247\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3249\" data-end=\"3339\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3249\" data-end=\"3339\"\u003ePerfect for ruining diets, relationships, and emotional stability. One bite at a time.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3341\" data-end=\"3377\"\u003eNow go be a menace. They deserve it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e Make sure you put the recipient's \u003cspan\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003eand\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003ein the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan size=\"4\"\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Dicks By Mail - Anonymously mail a bag of dicks","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":41661430497364,"sku":"BOD+CHOCOD","price":32.38,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/gummy-chocolate-bundle-9699897.png?v=1755878846"},{"product_id":"all-the-dicks-bundle-gummy-dicks-chocolate-dick-and-dick-glitter-bomb","title":"All The Dicks Bundle (Gummy Dicks, Chocolate Dick, and Dick Glitter Bomb)","description":"\u003ch2 data-start=\"155\" data-end=\"206\"\u003eThe Ultimate Triple Threat of Dick-Based Chaos\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"208\" data-end=\"473\"\u003eWhy settle for one prank when you can hit them with \u003cstrong data-start=\"260\" data-end=\"277\"\u003eall the dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e at once?\u003cbr data-start=\"286\" data-end=\"289\"\u003eThe \u003cstrong data-start=\"293\" data-end=\"317\"\u003eAll The Dicks Bundle\u003c\/strong\u003e isn’t just a gag gift, it’s a full-on edible, explosive, and glittery assault that leaves your target laughing, gagging, and possibly sweeping for hours.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"475\" data-end=\"531\"\u003eInside this glorious package of nonsense, they’ll get:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"532\" data-end=\"764\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"532\" data-end=\"580\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"534\" data-end=\"580\"\u003eA solid chocolate dick they can actually eat\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"581\" data-end=\"673\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"583\" data-end=\"673\"\u003eA bag of chewy gummy dicks they can snack or spit out depending on their emotional state\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"674\" data-end=\"764\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"676\" data-end=\"764\"\u003eA spring-loaded dick confetti bomb that blasts a glittery mess straight into their lap\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"766\" data-end=\"877\"\u003eAll packed up and shipped \u003cstrong data-start=\"792\" data-end=\"819\"\u003e100 percent anonymously\u003c\/strong\u003e so you can watch the chaos unfold from a safe distance.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"879\" data-end=\"1017\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"879\" data-end=\"904\"\u003eClick Add to Cart now\u003c\/strong\u003e and send someone the ultimate edible and glitter combo prank that will be remembered (and vacuumed) for years.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1019\" data-end=\"1022\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"1024\" data-end=\"1070\"\u003eWhy This Bundle Is Pure Prank Perfection\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1071\" data-end=\"1219\"\u003eYou could just send a chocolate dick. You could just send a gummy dick. You could even just send a glitter dick bomb. But where’s the fun in that?\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1221\" data-end=\"1414\"\u003eThe real comedy comes from hitting them with all three. They think they’ve seen the joke? Nope, here’s another. And another. It’s the prank equivalent of a triple punch combo in a video game.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1416\" data-end=\"1513\"\u003ePlus, this bundle saves you money, so you get to be both hilarious and financially responsible.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1515\" data-end=\"1518\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"1520\" data-end=\"1554\"\u003eA Visual You’ll Never Forget\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1555\" data-end=\"1835\"\u003ePicture this: your friend gets a mysterious package. They open it and find a sweet chocolate dick. Funny, right? Then they notice the bag of gummy dicks. Hilarious. Then they open the third item and BAM - a glittery confetti blast of mini paper dicks all over their living room.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1837\" data-end=\"1974\"\u003eAt this point, they’re either laughing so hard they can’t breathe or texting you in all caps with 14 angry emojis. Either way, you win.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1976\" data-end=\"1979\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"1981\" data-end=\"2025\"\u003eWhat’s Inside The All The Dicks Bundle\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2026\" data-end=\"2420\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2026\" data-end=\"2133\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2028\" data-end=\"2133\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2028\" data-end=\"2046\"\u003eChocolate Dick\u003c\/strong\u003e - Solid, handcrafted, and made to be eaten (or not, depending on how petty they are)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2134\" data-end=\"2210\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2136\" data-end=\"2210\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2136\" data-end=\"2151\"\u003eGummy Dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e - Chewy, fruity, and shaped for maximum immature giggles\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2211\" data-end=\"2326\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2213\" data-end=\"2326\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2213\" data-end=\"2248\"\u003eSpring-Loaded Dick Glitter Bomb\u003c\/strong\u003e - Packed with shiny paper dicks and glitter for a messy, hilarious surprise\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2327\" data-end=\"2364\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2329\" data-end=\"2364\"\u003eShips \u003cstrong data-start=\"2335\" data-end=\"2362\"\u003e100 percent anonymously\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2365\" data-end=\"2420\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2367\" data-end=\"2420\"\u003eDiscounted compared to buying each prank separately\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2422\" data-end=\"2425\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"2427\" data-end=\"2466\"\u003eHow to Use This Bundle Like a Pro\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2467\" data-end=\"2775\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2467\" data-end=\"2543\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2469\" data-end=\"2543\"\u003eSend it as a birthday prank to a friend who swears they’ve “seen it all”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2544\" data-end=\"2605\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2546\" data-end=\"2605\"\u003eMake it a bachelor party surprise that no one will forget\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2606\" data-end=\"2683\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2608\" data-end=\"2683\"\u003eUse it for a breakup joke that’s part edible gift, part cleanup nightmare\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2684\" data-end=\"2775\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2686\" data-end=\"2775\"\u003eSend it to a roommate who ate your leftovers (sweet revenge never tasted so chocolatey)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2777\" data-end=\"2780\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"2782\" data-end=\"2817\"\u003eThe Triple Reaction Guarantee\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2818\" data-end=\"2881\"\u003eWith this bundle, you’re guaranteed three distinct reactions:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003col data-start=\"2882\" data-end=\"3040\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2882\" data-end=\"2917\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2885\" data-end=\"2917\"\u003eLaughing at the chocolate dick\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2918\" data-end=\"2966\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2921\" data-end=\"2966\"\u003eEye-rolling and snacking on the gummy dicks\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2967\" data-end=\"3040\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2970\" data-end=\"3040\"\u003eScreaming and swearing while picking glitter dicks out of the carpet\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ol\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3042\" data-end=\"3108\"\u003eIt’s a full emotional arc, and you’re the evil genius behind it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"3110\" data-end=\"3113\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"3115\" data-end=\"3132\"\u003eBottom Line\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3133\" data-end=\"3403\"\u003eThe \u003cstrong data-start=\"3137\" data-end=\"3161\"\u003eAll The Dicks Bundle\u003c\/strong\u003e is for people who believe in going big or going home. One prank is funny. Three pranks in one box? That’s legendary. Whether it’s for a birthday, revenge, or just because you woke up and chose chaos, this bundle delivers every single time.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3405\" data-end=\"3483\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3405\" data-end=\"3430\"\u003eClick Add to Cart now\u003c\/strong\u003e and become the hero (or villain) of someone’s day.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3405\" data-end=\"3483\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e \u003c\/strong\u003eMake sure you put the recipient's \u003cspan\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003eand\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003ei\u003cwbr\u003en the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/wbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan size=\"4\"\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Dicks By Mail - Anonymously mail a bag of dicks","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":41666439020628,"sku":"BOD\u0026DICKBOMB\u0026CHOCOD","price":49.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/all-the-dicks-bundle-gummy-dicks-chocolate-dick-and-dick-glitter-bomb-2355220.png?v=1755878848"},{"product_id":"copy-of-living-with-chronic-hemorrhoids","title":"Prank Product Boxes","description":"\u003ch2 data-start=\"259\" data-end=\"327\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"261\" data-end=\"325\"\u003ePrank Product Boxes – The Ultimate Public Embarrassment Prank\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"328\" data-end=\"444\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cem data-start=\"328\" data-end=\"442\"\u003eBecause nothing says “I love you” quite like a box labeled “Butt Plug of the Month” delivered to their doorstep.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"446\" data-end=\"739\"\u003eNormal gifts are boring. Real products? Predictable. If you want to give someone a story they’ll be telling for years, you send them one of these \u003cstrong data-start=\"592\" data-end=\"614\"\u003eFake Product Boxes\u003c\/strong\u003e – a completely innocent cardboard box that \u003cem data-start=\"658\" data-end=\"665\"\u003elooks\u003c\/em\u003e like it contains something horrifying, awkward, or straight-up illegal.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"741\" data-end=\"995\"\u003eWe’re talking box labels like \u003cstrong data-start=\"771\" data-end=\"797\"\u003eButt Plug of the Month\u003c\/strong\u003e, \u003cstrong data-start=\"799\" data-end=\"820\"\u003ePube Braiding Kit\u003c\/strong\u003e, \u003cstrong data-start=\"822\" data-end=\"837\"\u003eMicro Penis\u003c\/strong\u003e, \u003cstrong data-start=\"839\" data-end=\"854\"\u003eGranny Porn\u003c\/strong\u003e, and even an \u003cstrong data-start=\"868\" data-end=\"887\"\u003eSTD Home Tester\u003c\/strong\u003e. Each one is loud, public, and just embarrassing enough to make your target wish they lived under a rock.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"997\" data-end=\"1258\"\u003eIt ships 100 percent anonymously. You can even add optional chaos – glitter bombs, chocolate dicks, confetti cards – to make it more than just awkward. This isn’t just a prank. It’s public humiliation, wrapped in cardboard and shipped straight to their hands.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1260\" data-end=\"1399\"\u003eClick \u003cstrong data-start=\"1266\" data-end=\"1281\"\u003eAdd to Cart\u003c\/strong\u003e now and make someone question their life choices in front of their neighbors, coworkers, or that cute FedEx driver.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1401\" data-end=\"1404\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1406\" data-end=\"1456\"\u003eWhy Prank Product Boxes Are the King of Pranks\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1458\" data-end=\"1778\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1458\" data-end=\"1547\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1460\" data-end=\"1547\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1460\" data-end=\"1489\"\u003eEmbarrassment on delivery\u003c\/strong\u003e – The joke starts the second the mailman hands it over.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1548\" data-end=\"1624\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1550\" data-end=\"1624\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1550\" data-end=\"1573\"\u003eCompletely harmless\u003c\/strong\u003e – It’s just packaging, no real “product” inside.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1625\" data-end=\"1681\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1627\" data-end=\"1681\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1627\" data-end=\"1652\"\u003e100 percent anonymous\u003c\/strong\u003e – You can deny it forever.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1682\" data-end=\"1778\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1684\" data-end=\"1778\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1684\" data-end=\"1700\"\u003eCustomizable\u003c\/strong\u003e – Choose the label, add a personal message, or throw in a bonus prank item.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1780\" data-end=\"1783\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1785\" data-end=\"1815\"\u003eThe Scene You’re Creating\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1817\" data-end=\"1951\"\u003ePicture this. The delivery guy shows up. They sign for a package. Right there, printed in huge letters, is \u003cem data-start=\"1924\" data-end=\"1948\"\u003eButt Plug of the Month\u003c\/em\u003e.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1953\" data-end=\"2255\"\u003eNow imagine that happening in a hotel lobby. Or in front of their nosy neighbor. Or at their office mailroom. They try to play it cool, but everyone saw it. Everyone is silently judging. They take it inside, heart racing, and finally open it… only to find out it’s fake. And then they start laughing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2257\" data-end=\"2365\"\u003eThe embarrassment fades into relief. Then back into laughter. Then into plotting how they’ll get you back.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2367\" data-end=\"2370\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2372\" data-end=\"2408\"\u003eReal Reviews from Evil Geniuses\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-start=\"2410\" data-end=\"2814\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2412\" data-end=\"2814\"\u003e“Great purchase as always. Dicks by Mail for the win again.”\u003cbr data-start=\"2472\" data-end=\"2475\"\u003e“This was a revenge prank to a co-worker. Delivered this to his full name and room number at a hotel in a different state… they handed the package to him in front of other guests! It was hilarious!!! Wish I could’ve been there personally.”\u003cbr data-start=\"2716\" data-end=\"2719\"\u003e“My buddy opened it and thought it was real, laughed so hard once he realized it was fake.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2816\" data-end=\"2819\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2821\" data-end=\"2845\"\u003eWhat You’re Getting\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2847\" data-end=\"3406\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2847\" data-end=\"3054\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2849\" data-end=\"2927\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2849\" data-end=\"2874\"\u003eOne fake shipping box\u003c\/strong\u003e with an embarrassing product label of your choice:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2930\" data-end=\"3054\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2930\" data-end=\"2956\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2932\" data-end=\"2956\"\u003eButt Plug of the Month\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2959\" data-end=\"2980\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2961\" data-end=\"2980\"\u003ePube Braiding Kit\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2983\" data-end=\"2996\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2985\" data-end=\"2996\"\u003ePink Wink\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2999\" data-end=\"3014\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3001\" data-end=\"3014\"\u003eMicro Penis\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3017\" data-end=\"3032\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3019\" data-end=\"3032\"\u003eGranny Porn\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3035\" data-end=\"3054\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3037\" data-end=\"3054\"\u003eSTD Home Tester\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3055\" data-end=\"3137\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3057\" data-end=\"3137\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3057\" data-end=\"3078\"\u003eOptional add-ons:\u003c\/strong\u003e Glitter bombs, chocolate dicks, or confetti cards inside\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3138\" data-end=\"3202\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3140\" data-end=\"3202\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3140\" data-end=\"3158\"\u003eCustomization:\u003c\/strong\u003e Add a personal message for extra trolling\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3203\" data-end=\"3250\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3205\" data-end=\"3250\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3205\" data-end=\"3218\"\u003eDelivery:\u003c\/strong\u003e Ships 100 percent anonymously\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3251\" data-end=\"3406\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3253\" data-end=\"3406\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3253\" data-end=\"3269\"\u003ePerfect For:\u003c\/strong\u003e Mailman embarrassment prank, hotel delivery revenge, anonymous joke, gag gift packaging, bachelor party prank, ultimate shock delivery\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"3408\" data-end=\"3411\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"3413\" data-end=\"3450\"\u003eWhy This Works Every Single Time\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3452\" data-end=\"3653\"\u003eBecause it’s not just a gift. It’s an experience. The second the package is handed over, the prank begins. You don’t need to be there. You don’t even need to record it. The embarrassment is built in.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3655\" data-end=\"3717\"\u003eFake Product Boxes hit all the sweet spots of a great prank:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"3718\" data-end=\"3920\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3718\" data-end=\"3774\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3720\" data-end=\"3774\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3720\" data-end=\"3739\"\u003eSurprise factor\u003c\/strong\u003e – They have no idea it’s coming.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3775\" data-end=\"3840\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3777\" data-end=\"3840\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3777\" data-end=\"3796\"\u003eSocial pressure\u003c\/strong\u003e – Delivered in public for maximum effect.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3841\" data-end=\"3920\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3843\" data-end=\"3920\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3843\" data-end=\"3862\"\u003eHarmless reveal\u003c\/strong\u003e – Once they open it, they realize it’s all in good fun.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3922\" data-end=\"3965\"\u003eIt’s the prank that delivers (literally).\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"3967\" data-end=\"3970\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"3972\" data-end=\"4000\"\u003eSend It. Laugh Forever.\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"4002\" data-end=\"4150\"\u003eSome pranks fade fast. This one lives on every time they think about the day the mailman handed them a box of “Granny Porn” in front of strangers.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"4152\" data-end=\"4322\"\u003eClick \u003cstrong data-start=\"4158\" data-end=\"4173\"\u003eAdd to Cart\u003c\/strong\u003e. Pick the label. Decide if you want to add glitter, candy dicks, or confetti. Then sit back and let the delivery driver do all the work for you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"4152\" data-end=\"4322\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e Make sure you put the recipient's \u003cspan\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003eand\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003ein the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan size=\"4\"\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Pranks Anonymous","offers":[{"title":"Butt Plug of the Month","offer_id":41681109188692,"sku":"PLUGBOXINSERTKRAFT","price":9.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"STD Home Tester","offer_id":41681109221460,"sku":"STDBOXKRAFTINSERT","price":9.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pube Braiding Kit","offer_id":41681109254228,"sku":"PUBBOXINSERTKRAFT","price":9.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink Wink","offer_id":41681109286996,"sku":"WINKBOXINSERTKRAFT","price":9.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Granny Porn","offer_id":41681109352532,"sku":"GRANBOXKRAFTINSERt","price":9.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Micro Penis","offer_id":41681109319764,"sku":"MCPNBOXKRAFTINSERt","price":9.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/prank-product-boxes-2617362.jpg?v=1755878741"},{"product_id":"let-it-snow-glitter-bomb-christmas-card","title":"The Weather Outside - Glitter bomb Christmas Card","description":"\u003ch2 data-end=\"54\" data-start=\"0\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThe Weather Outside - Glitter Bomb Christmas Card\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"202\" data-start=\"56\"\u003eBecause nothing says \u003cem data-end=\"93\" data-start=\"77\"\u003eholiday spirit\u003c\/em\u003e like sending someone a card that detonates in their face and turns their home into a snow globe from hell.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"461\" data-start=\"204\"\u003eThis isn’t your sweet grandma’s Christmas card. This is a \u003cstrong data-end=\"290\" data-start=\"262\"\u003eweaponized holiday prank\u003c\/strong\u003e disguised in holly, jolly wrapping. The Weather Outside - Glitter Bomb Christmas Card looks all festive and harmless… until they open it. That’s when the blizzard hits.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"704\" data-start=\"463\"\u003eWe’re talking an \u003cstrong data-end=\"514\" data-start=\"480\"\u003eavalanche of fake snow glitter\u003c\/strong\u003e - the clingy kind that doesn’t vacuum up no matter how many times they try. It’s in their carpet. It’s in their hair. It’s in their cat. And it’s going to be there well into the new year.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"876\" data-start=\"706\"\u003eShips \u003cstrong data-end=\"739\" data-start=\"712\"\u003e100 percent anonymously\u003c\/strong\u003e, so you can unleash holiday chaos without ever getting caught. If Santa had a naughty list for pranks, this would be right at the top.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"951\" data-start=\"878\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"899\" data-start=\"878\"\u003eClick Add to Cart\u003c\/strong\u003e now, and let it snow… all over their living room.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"956\" data-start=\"953\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"1016\" data-start=\"958\"\u003eWhy This Christmas Card is the Perfect Holiday Ambush\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1238\" data-start=\"1018\"\u003eRegular Christmas cards? Boring. They get read once, stuck on the fridge, and forgotten. But \u003cstrong data-end=\"1119\" data-start=\"1111\"\u003ethis\u003c\/strong\u003e is the Christmas card they’ll never forget - mostly because they’ll still be finding glitter on their couch in July.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-end=\"1539\" data-start=\"1240\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1311\" data-start=\"1240\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1311\" data-start=\"1242\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1267\" data-start=\"1242\"\u003eHoliday-themed design\u003c\/strong\u003e - looks sweet and innocent until it isn’t\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1386\" data-start=\"1312\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1386\" data-start=\"1314\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1348\" data-start=\"1314\"\u003eExplosion of fake snow glitter\u003c\/strong\u003e - the gift that keeps on irritating\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1444\" data-start=\"1387\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1444\" data-start=\"1389\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1410\" data-start=\"1389\"\u003eShips anonymously\u003c\/strong\u003e - you stay off the naughty list\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"1539\" data-start=\"1445\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1539\" data-start=\"1447\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"1476\" data-start=\"1447\"\u003eOption to activate or not\u003c\/strong\u003e - write your own message or let the glitter speak for itself\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1593\" data-start=\"1541\"\u003eThis is \u003cstrong data-end=\"1590\" data-start=\"1549\"\u003eChristmas petty revenge at its finest\u003c\/strong\u003e.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"1598\" data-start=\"1595\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"1630\" data-start=\"1600\"\u003eThe Scene You’re Creating\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1775\" data-start=\"1632\"\u003ePicture it. They come home after a long day, ready to relax. They see a Christmas card in the mail. “Aw, how nice,” they think. They open it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1784\" data-start=\"1777\"\u003eBOOM.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1939\" data-start=\"1786\"\u003eInstant snowstorm. Glitter in their lap. Glitter on the dog. Glitter on the dinner table. They freeze for a second, confused. Then the swearing starts.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2156\" data-start=\"1941\"\u003eThey’ll spend the next 20 minutes sweeping, vacuuming, and trying to remember every single person who might hate them enough to do this. And you? You’ll be somewhere else, sipping eggnog, grinning like the Grinch.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"2161\" data-start=\"2158\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"2179\" data-start=\"2163\"\u003ePerfect For\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-end=\"2466\" data-start=\"2181\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2248\" data-start=\"2181\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2248\" data-start=\"2183\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2209\" data-start=\"2183\"\u003eSecret Santa surprises\u003c\/strong\u003e that go way beyond “funny mug” level\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2296\" data-start=\"2249\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2296\" data-start=\"2251\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2271\" data-start=\"2251\"\u003eChristmas pranks\u003c\/strong\u003e for friends and family\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2345\" data-start=\"2297\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2345\" data-start=\"2299\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2316\" data-start=\"2299\"\u003eRevenge cards\u003c\/strong\u003e disguised as holiday cheer\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2408\" data-start=\"2346\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2408\" data-start=\"2348\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2369\" data-start=\"2348\"\u003eStocking stuffers\u003c\/strong\u003e for people you low-key want to annoy\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2466\" data-start=\"2409\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2466\" data-start=\"2411\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2442\" data-start=\"2411\"\u003eBachelor or holiday parties\u003c\/strong\u003e where mess equals fun\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"2471\" data-start=\"2468\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"2497\" data-start=\"2473\"\u003eWhat You’re Getting\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-end=\"2831\" data-start=\"2499\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2585\" data-start=\"2499\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2585\" data-start=\"2501\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2527\" data-start=\"2501\"\u003eFestive Christmas card\u003c\/strong\u003e - all holly and jolly on the outside, pure chaos inside\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2645\" data-start=\"2586\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2645\" data-start=\"2588\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2621\" data-start=\"2588\"\u003eEnvelope of fake snow glitter\u003c\/strong\u003e - explodes on opening\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2746\" data-start=\"2646\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2746\" data-start=\"2648\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2669\" data-start=\"2648\"\u003eActivation choice\u003c\/strong\u003e - glitter bomb locked and loaded, or non-activated so you can write a note\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2831\" data-start=\"2747\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2831\" data-start=\"2749\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2771\" data-start=\"2749\"\u003eAnonymous shipping\u003c\/strong\u003e - because it’s way more fun when they don’t know it’s you\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"2836\" data-start=\"2833\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"2885\" data-start=\"2838\"\u003eHow to Pull Off the Perfect Glitter Ambush\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003col data-end=\"3115\" data-start=\"2887\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2943\" data-start=\"2887\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2943\" data-start=\"2890\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2905\" data-start=\"2890\"\u003eAdd to Cart\u003c\/strong\u003e - choose activated or non-activated\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2996\" data-start=\"2944\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2996\" data-start=\"2947\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2970\" data-start=\"2947\"\u003eEnter their address\u003c\/strong\u003e - yours stays a mystery\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"3115\" data-start=\"2997\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3115\" data-start=\"3000\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"3024\" data-start=\"3000\"\u003eWait for the fallout\u003c\/strong\u003e - bonus points if they send you an angry “WTF” text without realizing you’re the culprit\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ol\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"3120\" data-start=\"3117\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"3152\" data-start=\"3122\"\u003eWhy This Works Every Time\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3388\" data-start=\"3154\"\u003eBecause it’s more than a prank - it’s a holiday memory they’ll never shake. It’s petty, it’s festive, and it’s the kind of thing people tell stories about for years. The glitter might be gone someday, but the trauma? That’s forever.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3490\" data-start=\"3390\"\u003eSo don’t just send a Christmas card this year. \u003cstrong data-end=\"3487\" data-start=\"3437\"\u003eSend a holiday glitter bomb and own the season\u003c\/strong\u003e.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"3495\" data-start=\"3492\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3583\" data-start=\"3497\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"3518\" data-start=\"3497\"\u003eClick Add to Cart\u003c\/strong\u003e right now and make it snow… in the most annoying way possible.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3583\" data-start=\"3497\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e \u003c\/strong\u003eMake sure you put the recipient's \u003cspan\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003eand\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003ei\u003cwbr\u003en the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/wbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan size=\"4\"\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"DickAtYourDoor","offers":[{"title":"Activated","offer_id":41694183227476,"sku":"WEATHEROUTSIDE-ACTIVATED","price":9.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Not Activated","offer_id":41694239326292,"sku":"WEATHEROUTSIDE-NOTACTIVATED","price":9.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/the-weather-outside-glitter-bomb-christmas-card-8550739.jpg?v=1755878737"},{"product_id":"spring-loaded-christmas-glitter-bomb","title":"Spring Loaded Christmas Glitter Cannon Prank!","description":"\u003cp\u003eGive a Christmas gift that will have the whole family feeling festive this year. Our brand new Spring Loaded Christmas Confetti Bomb will shoot out Holiday themed confetti (mixed with Dicks or Jizz if you want to add them) for a holiday surprise. \u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eOur Spring Loaded Dick Christmas comes in a standard tube that looks similar to the second picture, not the third and fourth picture - those are just to demo the dick and jizz confetti. \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003eMake sure you put the recipient's \u003cspan style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003eand\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003ein the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the dick bomb, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan size=\"4\"\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Dicks By Mail - Anonymously mail a bag of dicks","offers":[{"title":"Just Christmas","offer_id":41710676377684,"sku":"CHRISTMASBOMB","price":24.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Double The Christmas Confetti","offer_id":41710676410452,"sku":"DOUBLECHRISTMASBOMB","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Combo Dicks \u0026 Christmas Confetti","offer_id":41710676443220,"sku":"CHRISTMASANDDICKBOMB","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Mix Christmas and Jizz Confetti","offer_id":41710676475988,"sku":"CHRISTMASANDJIZZBOMB","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Christmas \u0026 Dicks \u0026 Jizz Confetti","offer_id":41710676508756,"sku":"CHRISTMASANDDICKANDJIZZABOMB","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Christmas Confetti \u0026 Regular Glitter","offer_id":41710676541524,"sku":"CHRISTMASANDDICKANDGLITTERBOMB","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/the-christmas-bundle-5590301.jpg?v=1755878738"},{"product_id":"birthday-bag-of-dicks","title":"Happy Birthday Bag of Dicks","description":"\u003ch2 data-start=\"144\" data-end=\"207\"\u003eHappy Birthday Bag of Dicks – Because Cake is Overrated\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"209\" data-end=\"332\"\u003eYou know what every birthday needs? A cake, some booze, a few questionable life choices… and a bag of fruity gummy dicks.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"334\" data-end=\"630\"\u003eYes, you read that right. The \u003cstrong data-start=\"364\" data-end=\"395\"\u003eHappy Birthday Bag of Dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e is the edible prank that says, “I care about you” and “also, eat a dick” in the same breath. It’s sweet, it’s chewy, it’s anatomically hilarious, and it’s going to be the one gift they remember long after the balloons have deflated.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"632\" data-end=\"889\"\u003eIf you’re tired of giving boring cards or generic candles, this is your move. It’s the ultimate birthday gag gift – funny enough to get a belly laugh, tasty enough to actually eat, and just inappropriate enough to make everyone question how they know you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"891\" data-end=\"958\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"891\" data-end=\"945\"\u003eOrder now, and make their birthday a little more d\u003c\/strong\u003eklicious.**\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"960\" data-end=\"963\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"965\" data-end=\"1011\"\u003eWhy This is the Perfect Birthday Surprise\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1013\" data-end=\"1282\"\u003eMost birthday gifts are forgettable. Nobody talks about the coffee mug you got them three years ago. But a bag of rainbow-colored gummy penises? Oh, they’ll talk. They’ll laugh. They’ll probably send you a text that says “WTF” followed by “also, these are delicious.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1284\" data-end=\"1450\"\u003eThis isn’t just candy – it’s an experience. The Happy Birthday Bag of Dicks brings that perfect mix of shock, laughter, and sugar rush that every celebration needs.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1452\" data-end=\"1455\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1457\" data-end=\"1487\"\u003eThe Scene You’re Creating\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1489\" data-end=\"1678\"\u003ePicture it: they open the birthday-themed bag, expecting chocolates, maybe mints. Nope. Ten perfectly crafted gummy dicks, bright and fruity, just sitting there, staring them in the face.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1680\" data-end=\"1838\"\u003eThen comes the laugh. Then the photos. Then the moment they realize… they actually taste good. Suddenly, your edible prank just became the hit of the party.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1840\" data-end=\"1843\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1845\" data-end=\"1877\"\u003eWhat Real People Are Saying\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-start=\"1879\" data-end=\"2087\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1881\" data-end=\"2087\"\u003e“Good gag birthday gift.”\u003cbr data-start=\"1906\" data-end=\"1909\"\u003e“I anonymously send this birthday gift every year at the end of April… and y’all never disappoint!!! Love it!”\u003cbr data-start=\"2021\" data-end=\"2024\"\u003e“I can’t wait to give these out as gifts! Super hilarious.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2089\" data-end=\"2092\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2094\" data-end=\"2118\"\u003eWhat You’re Getting\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2120\" data-end=\"2366\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2120\" data-end=\"2178\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2122\" data-end=\"2178\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2122\" data-end=\"2150\"\u003eBirthday-themed gift bag\u003c\/strong\u003e that screams celebration.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2179\" data-end=\"2239\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2181\" data-end=\"2239\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2181\" data-end=\"2206\"\u003e10 fruity gummy dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e – sweet, chewy, and hilarious.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2240\" data-end=\"2309\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2242\" data-end=\"2309\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2242\" data-end=\"2273\"\u003eOptional anonymous shipping\u003c\/strong\u003e so they’ll never know it was you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2310\" data-end=\"2366\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2312\" data-end=\"2366\"\u003eThe perfect combo of dirty joke and delicious snack.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2368\" data-end=\"2371\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2373\" data-end=\"2422\"\u003eWhen to Send the Happy Birthday Bag of Dicks\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2424\" data-end=\"2696\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2424\" data-end=\"2496\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2426\" data-end=\"2496\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2426\" data-end=\"2449\"\u003eTo your best friend\u003c\/strong\u003e who can handle a little inappropriate humor.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2497\" data-end=\"2560\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2499\" data-end=\"2560\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2499\" data-end=\"2513\"\u003eAs revenge\u003c\/strong\u003e for that prank they pulled on you last year.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2561\" data-end=\"2616\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2563\" data-end=\"2616\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2563\" data-end=\"2588\"\u003eFor the family member\u003c\/strong\u003e who has no filter anyway.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2617\" data-end=\"2696\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2619\" data-end=\"2696\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2619\" data-end=\"2651\"\u003eAt a white elephant exchange\u003c\/strong\u003e where you want to win by pure shock value.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2698\" data-end=\"2701\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2703\" data-end=\"2720\"\u003eHow It Works\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003col data-start=\"2722\" data-end=\"2983\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2722\" data-end=\"2776\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2725\" data-end=\"2776\"\u003eAdd the Happy Birthday Bag of Dicks to your cart.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2777\" data-end=\"2850\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2780\" data-end=\"2850\"\u003eEnter their address (or yours if you want to hand it over yourself).\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2851\" data-end=\"2893\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2854\" data-end=\"2893\"\u003eDecide if you want to stay anonymous.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2894\" data-end=\"2983\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2897\" data-end=\"2983\"\u003eWait for the inevitable text or phone call that starts with, “You absolute a**hole…”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ol\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2985\" data-end=\"2988\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2990\" data-end=\"3024\"\u003eThe Gift That Lives in Infamy\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3026\" data-end=\"3251\"\u003eSure, they’ll finish the gummies in a night, but the story? That’s forever. This is the kind of present that pops up in group chats, gets retold at the next barbecue, and cements you as the funniest gift-giver in the group.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3253\" data-end=\"3414\"\u003eBecause when you boil it down, birthdays are about creating memories. And nothing says “happy birthday” quite like a mouthful of dicks… candy dicks, of course.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"3416\" data-end=\"3419\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3421\" data-end=\"3601\"\u003e🎁 \u003cstrong data-start=\"3424\" data-end=\"3496\"\u003eClick “Add to Cart” now and send them a Happy Birthday Bag of Dicks.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr data-start=\"3496\" data-end=\"3499\"\u003eGive the gift of laughter, sugar, and mild humiliation – all wrapped up in a festive little package.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e If you are sending to someone else make sure you put the recipient's \u003cspan style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e and \u003cspan style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e in the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan size=\"4\"\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Dicks By Mail","offers":[{"title":"Single","offer_id":41789113892948,"sku":"BIRTHDAYBOD-1","price":15.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Double em!","offer_id":41789113925716,"sku":"BIRTHDAYBOD-2","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Three","offer_id":41789113958484,"sku":"BIRTHDAYBOD-3","price":41.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Four","offer_id":41789113991252,"sku":"BIRTHDAYBOD-4","price":52.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Six - send more dicks!","offer_id":41789114056788,"sku":"BIRTHDAYBOD-6","price":69.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ten - For the whole party!","offer_id":41789114122324,"sku":"BIRTHDAYBOD-10","price":99.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/happy-birthday-bag-of-dicks-9852683.png?v=1770741836"},{"product_id":"heartfelt-love-bag-of-dicks","title":"Bag of Dicks - I Thought You Could Use Some Dick Edition - A Heartfelt Gift","description":"\u003ch2 data-start=\"280\" data-end=\"363\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"282\" data-end=\"361\"\u003eBag of Dicks – I Thought You Could Use Some Dick Edition – A Heartfelt Gift\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"364\" data-end=\"453\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cem data-start=\"364\" data-end=\"451\"\u003eBecause sometimes the sweetest way to say “I care” is with a mouthful of gummy dicks.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"455\" data-end=\"726\"\u003eTired of boring gifts? Flowers wilt. Cards get tossed. Chocolates? Predictable. You know what’s unforgettable? Sending someone a \u003cstrong data-start=\"584\" data-end=\"610\"\u003eheart-covered gift bag\u003c\/strong\u003e filled with \u003cstrong data-start=\"623\" data-end=\"648\"\u003e10 fruity gummy dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e and a bold, loving message that says \u003cem data-start=\"686\" data-end=\"724\"\u003e“I thought you could use some dick.”\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"728\" data-end=\"884\"\u003eIt’s romantic. It’s inappropriate. It’s delicious. And it ships 100 percent anonymously so you can drop this edible love bomb without ever getting caught.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"886\" data-end=\"1102\"\u003eWhether it’s for Valentine’s Day, a birthday gag, a playful romantic gesture, or a “just because I love you and think you need more dick in your life” moment, this is the gift that says exactly what’s on your mind.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1104\" data-end=\"1211\"\u003eSo stop pretending you’re sentimental. Click \u003cstrong data-start=\"1149\" data-end=\"1164\"\u003eAdd to Cart\u003c\/strong\u003e and send them the bag of dicks they deserve.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1213\" data-end=\"1216\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1218\" data-end=\"1268\"\u003eWhy This Bag of Dicks is Pure Heartfelt Chaos\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1270\" data-end=\"1627\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1270\" data-end=\"1322\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1272\" data-end=\"1322\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1272\" data-end=\"1296\"\u003eFunny and thoughtful\u003c\/strong\u003e – Yes, you can be both.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1323\" data-end=\"1435\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1325\" data-end=\"1435\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1325\" data-end=\"1343\"\u003eActually tasty\u003c\/strong\u003e – Cherry, green apple, and blue raspberry gummy penis candy that’s dangerously snackable.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1436\" data-end=\"1520\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1438\" data-end=\"1520\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1438\" data-end=\"1460\"\u003eAnonymous delivery\u003c\/strong\u003e – They’ll never know it was you… unless you want them to.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1521\" data-end=\"1627\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1523\" data-end=\"1627\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1523\" data-end=\"1561\"\u003ePerfect for dirty-minded romantics\u003c\/strong\u003e – Friends, lovers, or that single friend who could use a laugh.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1629\" data-end=\"1632\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1634\" data-end=\"1664\"\u003eThe Scene You’re Creating\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1666\" data-end=\"1857\"\u003ePicture it. They open a cute, heart-covered bag. They expect chocolates. Maybe a scented candle. Instead, they’re greeted by 10 glorious, fruity, \u003cstrong data-start=\"1812\" data-end=\"1835\"\u003edick-shaped gummies\u003c\/strong\u003e smiling up at them.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1859\" data-end=\"2064\"\u003eThey laugh. They blush. They immediately take a photo and send it to their group chat. Someone says “Wait… who sent you that?” and they’ll have no idea. Unless, of course, you can’t keep your mouth shut.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2066\" data-end=\"2321\"\u003eThen they take a bite. And now you’ve gone from hilarious prank to delivering one of the best candy surprises they’ve had all year. Because yes, these \u003cstrong data-start=\"2217\" data-end=\"2245\"\u003egummy penis candy pieces\u003c\/strong\u003e are made for comedy but taste like the real deal when it comes to flavor.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2323\" data-end=\"2326\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2328\" data-end=\"2377\"\u003eReal Reviews from People Who Shared the Love\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-start=\"2379\" data-end=\"2560\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2381\" data-end=\"2560\"\u003e“Sent it to a friend for Valentine’s Day, she loved it!”\u003cbr data-start=\"2437\" data-end=\"2440\"\u003e“Hilarious, reliable, awesome service.”\u003cbr data-start=\"2481\" data-end=\"2484\"\u003e“Perfect mix of funny and thoughtful, recipient couldn’t stop laughing.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2562\" data-end=\"2565\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2567\" data-end=\"2591\"\u003eWhat You’re Getting\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2593\" data-end=\"3189\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2593\" data-end=\"2665\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2595\" data-end=\"2665\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2595\" data-end=\"2625\"\u003eOne heart-covered gift bag\u003c\/strong\u003e filled with 10 fruity \u003cstrong data-start=\"2648\" data-end=\"2663\"\u003egummy dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2666\" data-end=\"2745\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2668\" data-end=\"2745\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2668\" data-end=\"2680\"\u003eFlavors:\u003c\/strong\u003e A mouthwatering mix of cherry, green apple, and blue raspberry\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2746\" data-end=\"2805\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2748\" data-end=\"2805\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2748\" data-end=\"2767\"\u003eMessage on bag:\u003c\/strong\u003e “I thought you could use some dick”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2806\" data-end=\"2966\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2808\" data-end=\"2966\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2808\" data-end=\"2828\"\u003eQuantity:\u003c\/strong\u003e Single, Double em!, Three – Do you really love me?, Four – Yes Please, I’d like more, Six – send more dicks!, Ten – A whole lot of love\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2967\" data-end=\"3043\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2969\" data-end=\"3043\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2969\" data-end=\"2983\"\u003ePackaging:\u003c\/strong\u003e Ships 100 percent anonymously with no branding or receipt\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3044\" data-end=\"3189\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3046\" data-end=\"3189\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3046\" data-end=\"3062\"\u003ePerfect For:\u003c\/strong\u003e Valentine’s Day surprise, birthday gag gift, anonymous prank, gift for single friends, edible joke, playful romantic gesture\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"3191\" data-end=\"3194\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"3196\" data-end=\"3231\"\u003eWhy It Works Every Single Time\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3233\" data-end=\"3506\"\u003eBecause it’s the perfect mix of dirty humor and actual quality candy. People expect a naughty laugh, but they don’t expect the \u003cstrong data-start=\"3360\" data-end=\"3380\"\u003egummy dick candy\u003c\/strong\u003e to be genuinely delicious. That’s what makes this gift legendary – it’s not just a joke, it’s a snack they’ll actually eat.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3508\" data-end=\"3784\"\u003eIt works for couples with a twisted sense of humor, friends who appreciate adult candy, or that ex you’re still on “playfully inappropriate” terms with. And unlike a lame card or flowers, this gift will be remembered, photographed, and probably posted online for all to see.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"3786\" data-end=\"3789\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"3791\" data-end=\"3826\"\u003eSend the Dick. Spread the Joy.\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3828\" data-end=\"4020\"\u003eRight now, someone you know could use a smile, a laugh, and maybe a mouthful of \u003cstrong data-start=\"3908\" data-end=\"3932\"\u003epenis-shaped gummies\u003c\/strong\u003e. You could send them something boring… or you could send them exactly what they need.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"4022\" data-end=\"4176\"\u003eClick \u003cstrong data-start=\"4028\" data-end=\"4043\"\u003eAdd to Cart\u003c\/strong\u003e. Send the \u003cstrong data-start=\"4054\" data-end=\"4114\"\u003eBag of Dicks – I Thought You Could Use Some Dick Edition\u003c\/strong\u003e.\u003cbr data-start=\"4115\" data-end=\"4118\"\u003eMake their day just a little sweeter, and a lot dirtier.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"4022\" data-end=\"4176\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e If you are sending to someone else make sure you put the recipient's \u003cspan style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e and \u003cspan style=\"text-decoration: underline;\"\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e in the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan size=\"4\"\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Dicks By Mail","offers":[{"title":"Single","offer_id":41791317868628,"sku":"LOVEBOD-1","price":15.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Double em!","offer_id":41791317901396,"sku":"LOVEBOD-2","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Three - Do you really love me?","offer_id":41791317934164,"sku":"LOVEBOD-3","price":41.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Four - Yes please, I'd like more","offer_id":41791317966932,"sku":"LOVEBOD-4","price":52.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Six - send more dicks!","offer_id":41791317999700,"sku":"LOVEBOD-6","price":69.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ten - A whole lot of love","offer_id":41791318032468,"sku":"LOVEBOD-10","price":99.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/bag-of-dicks-i-thought-you-could-use-some-dick-edition-a-heartfelt-gift-2691147.jpg?v=1755878736"},{"product_id":"pride-bag-of-gummy-dicks","title":"Pride Rainbow Bag of Gummy Dicks","description":"\u003ch2 data-start=\"136\" data-end=\"218\"\u003ePride Rainbow Bag of Gummy Dicks - Sweet, Sassy, and Deliciously Offensive\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"220\" data-end=\"556\"\u003eLet’s be honest - there’s no polite way to hand someone a bag of gummy dicks. And that’s the beauty of it. The \u003cstrong data-start=\"331\" data-end=\"367\"\u003ePride Rainbow Bag of Gummy Dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e is loud, proud, fruity as hell, and unapologetically inappropriate. It’s the perfect mix of sweet and sassy, guaranteed to make someone laugh so hard they choke on a chewy rainbow shaft.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"558\" data-end=\"652\"\u003eIt’s candy with a cause - to spread love, laughter, and maybe a little bit of petty payback.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"654\" data-end=\"956\"\u003eYou want to know why this is better than sending boring chocolates or flowers? Because anybody can do that. But sending a colorful bag of penis-shaped gummies? That’s not just a gift, that’s a \u003cem data-start=\"847\" data-end=\"858\"\u003estatement\u003c\/em\u003e. It says, “I love you enough to send you a bag of dicks… and I hope you enjoy every last bite.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"958\" data-end=\"1077\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"958\" data-end=\"1075\"\u003eOrder now, send anonymously, and watch as your friends try to figure out who sent them this chewy rainbow of joy.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1079\" data-end=\"1082\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1084\" data-end=\"1153\"\u003eWhy You’ll Love Sending (or Receiving) This Bag of Rainbow Dicks\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1155\" data-end=\"1274\"\u003eBecause it’s fun. Because it’s ridiculous. Because candy tastes better when it’s shaped like something inappropriate.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1276\" data-end=\"1579\"\u003eThe Pride Rainbow Bag of Gummy Dicks isn’t just a gag - it’s actually good candy. Each bag comes with 10 fruity, rainbow-colored gummy penises that are soft, chewy, and bursting with flavor. Whether you send it as a Pride Month gift, a party favor, or a random Tuesday pick-me-up, it lands every time.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1581\" data-end=\"1750\"\u003eAnd yes - it ships \u003cstrong data-start=\"1600\" data-end=\"1627\"\u003e100 percent anonymously\u003c\/strong\u003e. No awkward “return address” giving you away. Just you, cackling from the shadows like the benevolent prankster you are.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1752\" data-end=\"1755\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1757\" data-end=\"1783\"\u003eWhat’s Inside the Bag\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1785\" data-end=\"2119\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1785\" data-end=\"1870\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1787\" data-end=\"1870\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1787\" data-end=\"1829\"\u003e10 fruity, rainbow-colored gummy dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e - delicious and proudly inappropriate.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1871\" data-end=\"1943\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1873\" data-end=\"1943\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1873\" data-end=\"1899\"\u003ePride-themed packaging\u003c\/strong\u003e - bright, bold, and impossible to ignore.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1944\" data-end=\"2027\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1946\" data-end=\"2027\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1946\" data-end=\"1966\"\u003eShips discreetly\u003c\/strong\u003e - so you can send to anyone without spoiling the surprise.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2028\" data-end=\"2119\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2030\" data-end=\"2119\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2030\" data-end=\"2052\"\u003eReal candy quality\u003c\/strong\u003e - these aren’t chalky dollar-store gummies, they’re legit tasty.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2121\" data-end=\"2124\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2126\" data-end=\"2156\"\u003eWhat Customers Are Saying\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-start=\"2158\" data-end=\"2226\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2160\" data-end=\"2226\"\u003e“I sent to my friend as a joke and he thought it was hilarious!”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2228\" data-end=\"2279\"\u003eShort, sweet, and exactly what we were going for.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2281\" data-end=\"2284\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2286\" data-end=\"2303\"\u003ePerfect For…\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2305\" data-end=\"2717\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2305\" data-end=\"2392\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2307\" data-end=\"2392\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2307\" data-end=\"2335\"\u003ePride Month celebrations\u003c\/strong\u003e - because nothing says “love wins” like rainbow dicks.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2393\" data-end=\"2458\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2395\" data-end=\"2458\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2395\" data-end=\"2415\"\u003eLGBTQ+ gag gifts\u003c\/strong\u003e - sweet, silly, and a little scandalous.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2459\" data-end=\"2552\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2461\" data-end=\"2552\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2461\" data-end=\"2483\"\u003eBirthday surprises\u003c\/strong\u003e - imagine opening a gift bag and seeing these staring back at you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2553\" data-end=\"2608\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2555\" data-end=\"2608\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2555\" data-end=\"2582\"\u003eAnonymous edible pranks\u003c\/strong\u003e - leave them wondering.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2609\" data-end=\"2667\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2611\" data-end=\"2667\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2611\" data-end=\"2627\"\u003eParty favors\u003c\/strong\u003e - every guest gets a mouthful of fun.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2668\" data-end=\"2717\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2670\" data-end=\"2717\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2670\" data-end=\"2686\"\u003eJust because\u003c\/strong\u003e - do you even need a reason?\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2719\" data-end=\"2722\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2724\" data-end=\"2762\"\u003eThe Story You’ll Be Dying to Tell\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2764\" data-end=\"2976\"\u003eHere’s how it goes: Your friend gets a package. They’re intrigued. They open it and pull out a Pride-themed bag. They look inside… and instantly realize they’re holding 10 fruity, rainbow-colored gummy penises.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2978\" data-end=\"3161\"\u003eThey laugh. They blush. They maybe even pop one in their mouth right there. And then they \u003cem data-start=\"3068\" data-end=\"3074\"\u003ehave\u003c\/em\u003e to tell someone about it, because this is not the kind of gift you keep to yourself.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"3163\" data-end=\"3166\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"3168\" data-end=\"3204\"\u003eHow to Make This Gift Legendary\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003col data-start=\"3206\" data-end=\"3485\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3206\" data-end=\"3250\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3209\" data-end=\"3250\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3209\" data-end=\"3224\"\u003eAdd to cart\u003c\/strong\u003e - stop overthinking it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3251\" data-end=\"3328\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3254\" data-end=\"3328\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3254\" data-end=\"3277\"\u003ePick your recipient\u003c\/strong\u003e - friend, partner, party host, or random cousin.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3329\" data-end=\"3400\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3332\" data-end=\"3400\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3332\" data-end=\"3352\"\u003eShip anonymously\u003c\/strong\u003e - plausible deniability is a beautiful thing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"3401\" data-end=\"3485\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3404\" data-end=\"3485\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3404\" data-end=\"3427\"\u003eEnjoy the aftermath\u003c\/strong\u003e - because you know this will become a group chat story.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ol\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"3487\" data-end=\"3490\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"3492\" data-end=\"3547\"\u003eFinal Take: This is How You Spread Joy (and Dicks)\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3549\" data-end=\"3744\"\u003eThe \u003cstrong data-start=\"3553\" data-end=\"3589\"\u003ePride Rainbow Bag of Gummy Dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e is the perfect combination of sweet, rude, and ridiculously fun. It’s a candy gift that celebrates Pride, makes people laugh, and actually tastes great.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3746\" data-end=\"3911\"\u003eWhether you’re sending it as a show of love, as a laugh-out-loud party favor, or just to make someone’s day a little more colorful (and awkward), this is the move.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3913\" data-end=\"4006\"\u003e🌈 \u003cstrong data-start=\"3916\" data-end=\"3934\"\u003eGrab a bag now\u003c\/strong\u003e and send someone a chewy, fruity, rainbow shaft they’ll never forget.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3913\" data-end=\"4006\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT\u003c\/strong\u003e:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e If you are sending to someone else make sure you put the recipient's \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e and \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e in the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp dir=\"ltr\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Dicks By Mail","offers":[{"title":"Single","offer_id":41791354273876,"sku":"PRIDEBOD-1","price":15.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Double em!","offer_id":41791354306644,"sku":"PRIDEBOD-2","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Three - Do you really love me?","offer_id":41791354339412,"sku":"PRIDEBOD-3","price":41.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Four - Yes please, I'd like more","offer_id":41791354372180,"sku":"PRIDEBOD-4","price":52.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Six - send more dicks!","offer_id":41791354404948,"sku":"PRIDEBOD-6","price":69.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ten - A whole lot of love","offer_id":41791354437716,"sku":"PRIDEBOD-10","price":99.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/bag-of-gummy-ds-something-i-know-youll-love-8872955.png?v=1779249067"},{"product_id":"valentines-day-bundle-i-heard-you-needed-some-dick","title":"Valentine’s Day Bundle: The Dick Gift Set","description":"\u003cp\u003ehis Valentine’s Day, say goodbye to boring gifts and embrace the laughter with the ultimate \u003cstrong\u003echocolate cock\u003c\/strong\u003e and candy combo. The \u003cstrong\u003e\"I Heard You Needed Some Dick\" Bundle\u003c\/strong\u003e is here to deliver humor, sweetness, and a playful dose of sass to anyone who could use a good laugh (and maybe a little “dick”) this holiday. Whether it’s for your partner, bestie, or that one friend who’s always joking about needing a chocolate penis, this bundle is the perfect mix of sweet and cheeky fun.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhat’s Included in This Hilarious Valentine’s Day Bundle:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e🍫 \u003cstrong\u003eChocolate Dick\u003c\/strong\u003e: A rich, indulgent chocolate penis made with premium Peruvian cacao that’s as delicious as it is daring. Perfect for anyone who loves a good laugh with their dessert.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e🍬 \u003cstrong\u003eHeartfelt Bag of Dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e: Sweet, fruity gummy dicks that are the ultimate Valentine’s candy for someone who needs to “eat a bag of dicks” in the most delicious way possible.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e🍫 \u003cstrong\u003eChocolate Cock – Valentine’s Edition\u003c\/strong\u003e: A second chocolate masterpiece because one \u003cstrong\u003echocolate cock\u003c\/strong\u003e just isn’t enough! This bold treat is perfect for snacking and sharing (or keeping all to yourself).\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e🍆 \u003cstrong\u003eA Dash of Self-Love\u003c\/strong\u003e: The bundle also features a cheeky self-care surprise because Valentine’s Day is all about loving yourself—literally.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhy It’s the Perfect Valentine’s Day Gift:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e❤️ \u003cstrong\u003eFor Your Partner\u003c\/strong\u003e: Remind them how sweet (and funny) love can be with a delicious \u003cstrong\u003echocolate dick\u003c\/strong\u003e and some Valentine’s candy they’ll never forget.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e😂 \u003cstrong\u003eFor Your Single Friends\u003c\/strong\u003e: Joking about needing dick on Valentine’s Day? Problem solved—this bundle’s got chocolate, candy, and laughs to spare.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💔 \u003cstrong\u003eFor Your Ex\u003c\/strong\u003e: Because nothing says “closure” like sending them a bag of dicks or a \u003cstrong\u003echocolate penis\u003c\/strong\u003e with a side of sass.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e🎁 \u003cstrong\u003eFor Anyone Who Needs a Laugh\u003c\/strong\u003e: The perfect mix of humor, sweetness, and inappropriate fun for friends, coworkers, or Galentines.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhy Everyone Loves It:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDelicious Treats\u003c\/strong\u003e: From fruity gummy dicks to rich, velvety \u003cstrong\u003echocolate cock\u003c\/strong\u003e, there’s something for every sweet tooth.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eUnforgettable Humor\u003c\/strong\u003e: The ultimate gag gift that’s bold, funny, and absolutely unforgettable.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003ePerfectly Themed for Valentine’s Day\u003c\/strong\u003e: Whether it’s love, laughter, or sweet revenge, this bundle covers it all.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Dicks By Mail - Anonymously mail a bag of dicks","offers":[{"title":"bundle variant #1","offer_id":41800976498772,"sku":null,"price":80.38,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"bundle variant #2","offer_id":41800976531540,"sku":null,"price":84.17,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"bundle variant #3","offer_id":41800976564308,"sku":null,"price":90.24,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"bundle variant #4","offer_id":41800976597076,"sku":null,"price":94.04,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"bundle variant #5","offer_id":41800976629844,"sku":null,"price":99.73,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"bundle variant #6","offer_id":41800976662612,"sku":null,"price":103.52,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"bundle variant #7","offer_id":41800976695380,"sku":null,"price":108.45,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"bundle variant #8","offer_id":41800976728148,"sku":null,"price":112.24,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"bundle variant #9","offer_id":41800976760916,"sku":null,"price":120.59,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"bundle variant #10","offer_id":41800976793684,"sku":null,"price":124.39,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"bundle variant #11","offer_id":41800976826452,"sku":null,"price":144.1,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"bundle variant #12","offer_id":41800976859220,"sku":null,"price":147.9,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/valentines-day-bundle-the-dick-gift-set-5545704.png?v=1755878734"},{"product_id":"bag-of-ds-i-thought-you-could-use-some-d-a-heartfelt-gift","title":"Bag of Gummy D's - I Thought You Could Use Some D","description":"\u003ch2 data-start=\"168\" data-end=\"225\"\u003eBag of Gummy D’s - I Thought You Could Use Some D\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"227\" data-end=\"582\"\u003eSometimes words just aren’t enough. Sometimes you need to send a message that’s sweet, juicy, and shaped like… well, you know. Enter the \u003cstrong data-start=\"364\" data-end=\"417\"\u003eBag of Gummy D’s - I Thought You Could Use Some D\u003c\/strong\u003e. Ten fruity, brightly colored, delicious little gummy penises in a heart-covered bag that says exactly what you’re thinking without you having to say it out loud.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"584\" data-end=\"906\"\u003eIf flowers are for romance, these are for chaos. Perfect for Valentine’s Day, birthdays, or just those random Tuesday afternoons when your buddy looks like they could use a good laugh (and a mouthful of candy D). Ships 100 percent anonymously, so you can watch the mystery and confusion unfold without ever being caught.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"908\" data-end=\"973\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"908\" data-end=\"971\"\u003eOrder now and send them the D they didn’t know they needed.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"975\" data-end=\"978\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"980\" data-end=\"1026\"\u003eWhy This is the Gift They’ll Never Forget\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1028\" data-end=\"1286\"\u003eMost candy gifts? Forgettable. They unwrap it, eat it, and move on with their life. Not these bad boys. These gummy penises are more than candy - they’re a statement. They say, “I’m thinking about you, but in the most uncomfortably hilarious way possible.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1288\" data-end=\"1553\"\u003eIt’s the perfect edible gag gift. Sweet enough to actually enjoy, but funny enough to leave a lasting impression. And because they ship in a discreet, anonymous package, the recipient will spend way too much time wondering who sent them a bag full of candy cocks.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1555\" data-end=\"1558\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1560\" data-end=\"1590\"\u003eThe Scene You’re Creating\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1592\" data-end=\"1918\"\u003ePicture this. Your friend gets a small, heart-covered bag in the mail. They open it. Their brain says “candy,” but their eyes say “are those… tiny penises?” They laugh, they take a photo, they send it to the group chat. Suddenly, you’ve started a chain reaction of laughter, inappropriate jokes, and maybe even a taste test.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1920\" data-end=\"2044\"\u003eIf you’re lucky, they’ll post it online. If you’re \u003cem data-start=\"1971\" data-end=\"1979\"\u003ereally\u003c\/em\u003e lucky, they’ll keep one as a trophy in a candy jar for months.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2046\" data-end=\"2049\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2051\" data-end=\"2097\"\u003ePerfect for When Someone Could Use Some D\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2099\" data-end=\"2203\"\u003eWhether you’re looking to get a laugh or make a subtle (or not-so-subtle) statement, this is the move.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2205\" data-end=\"2486\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2205\" data-end=\"2262\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2207\" data-end=\"2262\"\u003eValentine’s Day surprise that’s more funny than sappy\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2263\" data-end=\"2321\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2265\" data-end=\"2321\"\u003eBirthday gag gift for that friend who “has everything”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2322\" data-end=\"2368\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2324\" data-end=\"2368\"\u003eA sweet pick-me-up for your single friends\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2369\" data-end=\"2430\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2371\" data-end=\"2430\"\u003eJust because you felt like mailing someone candy genitals\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2431\" data-end=\"2486\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2433\" data-end=\"2486\"\u003eA playful edible joke for someone who loves a laugh\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2488\" data-end=\"2491\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2493\" data-end=\"2519\"\u003eWhat’s Inside the Bag\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2521\" data-end=\"2829\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2521\" data-end=\"2588\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2523\" data-end=\"2588\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2523\" data-end=\"2548\"\u003e10 fruity gummy dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e - soft, chewy, and packed with flavor\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2589\" data-end=\"2680\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2591\" data-end=\"2680\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2591\" data-end=\"2612\"\u003eHeart-covered bag\u003c\/strong\u003e - because nothing says romance like candy cocks in cute packaging\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2681\" data-end=\"2751\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2683\" data-end=\"2751\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2683\" data-end=\"2717\"\u003e100 percent anonymous shipping\u003c\/strong\u003e - they’ll never know it was you\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2752\" data-end=\"2829\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2754\" data-end=\"2829\"\u003eA perfect balance of humor and sugar, making it the ultimate edible prank\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2831\" data-end=\"2834\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2836\" data-end=\"2872\"\u003eHow to Pull This Off Like a Pro\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003col data-start=\"2874\" data-end=\"3084\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2874\" data-end=\"2918\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2877\" data-end=\"2918\"\u003eAdd this bag of gummy D’s to your cart.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2919\" data-end=\"2996\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2922\" data-end=\"2996\"\u003eEnter their address, not yours. (Unless you want to hand-deliver the D.)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2997\" data-end=\"3084\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3000\" data-end=\"3084\"\u003eSit back and wait for the texts, calls, or social media posts to start rolling in.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ol\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"3269\" data-end=\"3272\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"3274\" data-end=\"3290\"\u003eBottom Line\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3292\" data-end=\"3618\"\u003eThe \u003cstrong data-start=\"3296\" data-end=\"3349\"\u003eBag of Gummy D’s - I Thought You Could Use Some D\u003c\/strong\u003e is not just candy. It’s comedy. It’s chaos. It’s a sugar-packed punchline in a bag. It’s for the friend who can take a joke, the ex who needs a laugh, or anyone who could use a sweet, fruity reminder that you’re thinking of them… in the most ridiculous way possible.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3620\" data-end=\"3703\"\u003eStop overthinking your gift. Skip the boring, predictable stuff. Send them the D.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3705\" data-end=\"3824\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3705\" data-end=\"3822\"\u003eClick “Add to Cart” now and give someone the most unforgettable, inappropriate, and tasty surprise of their life.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3705\" data-end=\"3824\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cem\u003e Make sure you put the recipient's \u003cspan\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003eand\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003ei\u003cwbr\u003en the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/wbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan size=\"4\"\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Dicks By Mail","offers":[{"title":"Single","offer_id":41832675770452,"sku":"LOVEBOD-1","price":15.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Double em!","offer_id":41832675803220,"sku":"LOVEBOD-2","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Three - Do you really love me?","offer_id":41832675835988,"sku":"LOVEBOD-3","price":41.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Four - Yes please, I'd like more","offer_id":41832675868756,"sku":"LOVEBOD-4","price":52.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Six - send more dicks!","offer_id":41832675901524,"sku":"LOVEBOD-6","price":69.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ten - A whole lot of love","offer_id":41832675934292,"sku":"LOVEBOD-10","price":99.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/bag-of-gummy-ds-i-thought-you-could-use-some-d-7773576.jpg?v=1770741836"},{"product_id":"the-dark-chocolate-cock-eat-a-dick","title":"The Dark Chocolate Cock - Eat A Dick","description":"\u003chr data-end=\"141\" data-start=\"138\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"223\" data-start=\"143\"\u003eThe Dark Chocolate Cock – The Sweetest Way to Tell Someone to Eat a Dick\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"303\" data-start=\"225\"\u003eSome gifts say “I care.”\u003cbr data-end=\"252\" data-start=\"249\"\u003eThis one says \u003cstrong data-end=\"301\" data-start=\"266\"\u003e“I care… but also, eat a dick.”\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"564\" data-start=\"305\"\u003eMeet the \u003cstrong data-end=\"337\" data-start=\"314\"\u003eDark Chocolate Cock\u003c\/strong\u003e – a solid, 4 to 5.5-inch slab of gluten-free Peruvian cacao shaped exactly like a penis. Yes, it’s edible. Yes, it’s delicious. And yes, it’s going to make whoever gets it laugh, blush, and maybe question their life choices.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"811\" data-start=\"566\"\u003eYou can send flowers, sure. Or… you can send a big, beautiful, edible dick in a discreet box. \u003cstrong data-end=\"718\" data-start=\"660\"\u003eClick Add to Cart now and make their day unforgettable\u003c\/strong\u003e – whether it’s out of love, revenge, or just because you’re a chaotic good kind of person.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"816\" data-start=\"813\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"851\" data-start=\"818\"\u003eWhy This is the Perfect Gift\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1027\" data-start=\"853\"\u003eLife’s too short for boring presents. You’ve got two choices: buy them another scented candle they’ll never use, or send them a dark chocolate penis they’ll \u003cem data-end=\"1024\" data-start=\"1010\"\u003enever forget\u003c\/em\u003e.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1285\" data-start=\"1029\"\u003eThis isn’t some cheap gag candy that tastes like wax. This is rich, smooth, premium Peruvian dark chocolate – but molded into the shape of a cock. It’s the perfect mix of classy and trashy. They’ll get the joke… but they’ll also actually enjoy eating it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1473\" data-start=\"1287\"\u003eWhether you’re saying “Happy Birthday,” “Congrats on the divorce,” or “Thanks for being a dick – here’s one for you,” this chocolate masterpiece gets the message across loud and clear.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"1478\" data-start=\"1475\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"1526\" data-start=\"1480\"\u003eA Story You’ll Want to Tell Over and Over\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1741\" data-start=\"1528\"\u003ePicture this: your friend opens the discreet little box, expecting… who knows what. Jewelry? A heartfelt note? Then they pull back the wrapping and \u003cem data-end=\"1682\" data-start=\"1676\"\u003eboom\u003c\/em\u003e – staring them in the face is a solid chocolate schlong.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"1771\" data-start=\"1743\"\u003eOne customer said it best:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-end=\"2086\" data-start=\"1773\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2086\" data-start=\"1775\"\u003e“Imagine your billion dollar company cans you two months before your five-year anniversary with zero notice. A few months later, you think… wait, I can send the president of the company a chocolate surprise. Made me laugh and feel better. And yes, I hope he sees this too – ahahahahahhaahahah!!!!! It worked.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2111\" data-start=\"2088\"\u003eAnother fan favorite:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-end=\"2272\" data-start=\"2113\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2272\" data-start=\"2115\"\u003e“Even with a Google Pay glitch, customer service made sure it got to the right destination. I’ve used this company twice and I’ve never been disappointed.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2301\" data-start=\"2274\"\u003eAnd my personal favorite:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-end=\"2405\" data-start=\"2303\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2405\" data-start=\"2305\"\u003e“Great experience. Easy purchase. Delivered as promised.”\u003cbr data-end=\"2365\" data-start=\"2362\"\u003eTranslation: Yes, they got their dick.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"2410\" data-start=\"2407\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"2445\" data-start=\"2412\"\u003eWhat You’re Actually Getting\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-end=\"2743\" data-start=\"2447\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2500\" data-start=\"2447\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2500\" data-start=\"2449\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2498\" data-start=\"2449\"\u003e4 to 5.5 inches of solid dark chocolate penis\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2614\" data-start=\"2501\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2614\" data-start=\"2503\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2546\" data-start=\"2503\"\u003e3 to 4 ounces of premium Peruvian cacao\u003c\/strong\u003e – gluten-free, so even the health nuts can suck on it guilt-free.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2695\" data-start=\"2615\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2695\" data-start=\"2617\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2639\" data-start=\"2617\"\u003eDiscreet packaging\u003c\/strong\u003e – no one will know what’s inside until it’s too late.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2743\" data-start=\"2696\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2743\" data-start=\"2698\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-end=\"2722\" data-start=\"2698\"\u003eHilarious and edible\u003c\/strong\u003e – a perfect combo.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"2748\" data-start=\"2745\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"2767\" data-start=\"2750\"\u003ePerfect For…\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-end=\"2935\" data-start=\"2769\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2791\" data-start=\"2769\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2791\" data-start=\"2771\"\u003eBirthday gag gifts\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2812\" data-start=\"2792\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2812\" data-start=\"2794\"\u003eAnonymous pranks\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2832\" data-start=\"2813\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2832\" data-start=\"2815\"\u003eBreakup revenge\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2857\" data-start=\"2833\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2857\" data-start=\"2835\"\u003eBachelorette parties\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2886\" data-start=\"2858\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2886\" data-start=\"2860\"\u003e“Just because” surprises\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"2935\" data-start=\"2887\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"2935\" data-start=\"2889\"\u003eThat friend who says they’ve seen everything\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"2940\" data-start=\"2937\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"2974\" data-start=\"2942\"\u003ePro Tips for Maximum Impact\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003col data-end=\"3158\" data-start=\"2976\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"3017\" data-start=\"2976\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3017\" data-start=\"2979\"\u003eOrder it anonymously for peak chaos.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"3083\" data-start=\"3018\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3083\" data-start=\"3021\"\u003eAdd your own note – sweet, sarcastic, or straight-up savage.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-end=\"3158\" data-start=\"3084\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3158\" data-start=\"3087\"\u003eSit back and wait for the text that says, “WTF did you just send me?”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ol\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"3163\" data-start=\"3160\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-end=\"3207\" data-start=\"3165\"\u003eThe Sweet Taste of Petty Satisfaction\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3365\" data-start=\"3209\"\u003eSure, you could send an edible arrangement. But will they tell \u003cem data-end=\"3278\" data-start=\"3272\"\u003ethat\u003c\/em\u003e story at every party for the next year? Nope. This, though… this is legend material.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3525\" data-start=\"3367\"\u003eThe Dark Chocolate Cock isn’t just a treat – it’s a statement. It’s the edible equivalent of a mic drop. A sweet, cocoa-rich middle finger wrapped in humor.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-end=\"3530\" data-start=\"3527\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3757\" data-start=\"3532\"\u003e🎯 \u003cstrong data-end=\"3560\" data-start=\"3535\"\u003eClick Add to Cart now\u003c\/strong\u003e and send someone the most delicious, most inappropriate gift they’ll ever unwrap. Whether they laugh, blush, or choke on it (hey, it’s possible), one thing’s for sure – they’ll never forget you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-end=\"3757\" data-start=\"3532\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e Make sure you put the recipient's \u003cspan\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003eand\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003ein the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan size=\"4\"\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"DickAtYourDoor","offers":[{"title":"The Chocolate Dick","offer_id":41835942903892,"sku":"DARKCHOCODICK","price":24.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Bach Shit Crazy","offer_id":41835955650644,"sku":"DARKCHOCODICKBACH","price":19.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Nuts About You Box","offer_id":41835943002196,"sku":"NUTSABOUTYOUDARKCHOCOD","price":24.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Santa Christmas Box","offer_id":41835942936660,"sku":"CHRISTMASCHOCODICKDARK","price":21.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"There's Something Fabulous In There Pride Box","offer_id":41835943034964,"sku":"FABULOUSDARKCHOCO","price":21.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/the-dark-chocolate-cock-eat-a-dick-1763557.jpg?v=1755878737"},{"product_id":"valentines-dick-edible-arrangement","title":"The Naughty Valentine’s Edible Arrangement: Chocolate Dicks, Gummy Dicks \u0026 Chocolate Buttholes","description":"\u003ch4\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThe Naughty Valentine’s Edible Arrangement: Chocolate Dicks, Gummy Dicks \u0026amp; Chocolate Buttholes\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eLooking for a \u003cstrong\u003ehilarious, slightly scandalous Valentine’s gift\u003c\/strong\u003e? Skip the cliché heart-shaped box and go straight for an \u003cstrong\u003eNSFW edible arrangement\u003c\/strong\u003e packed with \u003cstrong\u003emilk chocolate dicks, chewy gummy dicks, and rich dark chocolate buttholes.\u003c\/strong\u003e This bundle is \u003cstrong\u003ethe ultimate mix of sweet, sassy, and a little sinful.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💖 \u003cstrong\u003eWhat’s Inside?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003e🍆 \u003cstrong\u003e\"Be Mine\" Solid Milk Chocolate Dick\u003c\/strong\u003e – Because nothing says \"love\" like a thick, handcrafted chocolate surprise.\u003cbr\u003e🍫 \u003cstrong\u003e\"Nuts About You\" Dark Chocolate Dick with Crunchy Nuts\u003c\/strong\u003e – Tell them how crazy you are about them with SECOND chocolate dick\u003cbr\u003e🍑 \u003cstrong\u003e\"Eat Ass\" Dark Chocolate Buttholes\u003c\/strong\u003e – Because sometimes, dessert is all about the backside.\u003cbr\u003e🍬 \u003cstrong\u003e\"I Thought You Could Use Some Dick\" Fruity Gummy Dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e – A chewy, flavorful way to say \"You're on my mind.\"\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e🎯 \u003cstrong\u003eWho’s This For?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003e✔️ \u003cstrong\u003eThe Valentine with a wild sense of humor\u003c\/strong\u003e (\u003cem\u003ebecause regular chocolate is just too basic\u003c\/em\u003e)\u003cbr\u003e✔️ \u003cstrong\u003eThat single friend who keeps saying they “need some dick”\u003c\/strong\u003e (\u003cem\u003ewe’re just here to help\u003c\/em\u003e)\u003cbr\u003e✔️ \u003cstrong\u003eA bachelorette, bachelor, or Galentine’s party\u003c\/strong\u003e (\u003cem\u003ethis candy gets people talking\u003c\/em\u003e)\u003cbr\u003e✔️ \u003cstrong\u003eAnyone who appreciates top-tier chocolate with a side of laughter\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💝 \u003cstrong\u003eSweet, spicy, and guaranteed to get a reaction.\u003c\/strong\u003e This isn’t just a gift—it’s a conversation starter, a memory-maker, and the best way to send a message they won’t forget.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e👉 \u003cem\u003eStock is limited—grab yours before they’re gone!\u003c\/em\u003e Because nothing lasts forever… except our dedication to shipping dicks across the country.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Dicks By Mail - Anonymously mail a bag of dicks","offers":[{"title":"Regular","offer_id":41859034939476,"sku":null,"price":69.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/the-naughty-valentines-edible-arrangement-chocolate-dicks-gummy-dicks-chocolate-buttholes-3757470.png?v=1755878738"},{"product_id":"the-take-the-hint-valentine-s-bundle","title":"The \"Take the Hint\" Valentine’s Bundle - Vibrator and Gummy Dicks ❤️🍆😏","description":"\u003cp\u003eRoses are red, violets are blue, this bag's full of dicks… and so are my thoughts about you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e💘 \u003cstrong\u003eWhat’s Inside?\u003c\/strong\u003e 💘\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eThe “Go F\u003c\/strong\u003e* Yourself” Emojibator** – A cheeky little tool for \u003cem\u003epersonal\u003c\/em\u003e satisfaction… but let’s be real, I’d rather be handling that for you.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eA Heartfelt Bag of Dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e – Sweet, chewy, and slightly suggestive—kind of like me when I think about you.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThis is not \u003cem\u003ejust\u003c\/em\u003e a gag gift—it’s an \u003cstrong\u003einvitation\u003c\/strong\u003e. A \u003cem\u003ewink-wink, nudge-nudge\u003c\/em\u003e, let’s-cut-the-tension-and-do-something-about-it kind of situation. So, what do you say? Keep the toys, or come unwrap the real thing? 😏\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eHappy Valentine’s—hope you take the hint.\u003c\/strong\u003e 💋🔥\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Dicks By Mail - Anonymously mail a bag of dicks","offers":[{"title":"bundle variant #1","offer_id":41861372117076,"sku":null,"price":44.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/the-take-the-hint-valentines-bundle-vibrator-and-gummy-dicks-4691674.png?v=1755878733"},{"product_id":"pride-rainbow-bag-of-gummy-ds","title":"Bag of Gummy D's - Something I Know You'll Love","description":"\u003ch2 data-start=\"235\" data-end=\"290\"\u003eBag of Gummy D’s - Something I Know You’ll Love\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"292\" data-end=\"567\"\u003eEver wanted to give someone a gift that’s sweet, colorful, and just \u003cem data-start=\"360\" data-end=\"370\"\u003eslightly\u003c\/em\u003e offensive? Say hello to the \u003cstrong data-start=\"399\" data-end=\"419\"\u003eBag of Gummy D’s\u003c\/strong\u003e - 10 fruity rainbow-colored gummy penises in a Pride-themed bag, perfect for celebrating love, laughs, and maybe a little bit of awkward chewing.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"569\" data-end=\"662\"\u003eThis is not your grandma’s candy. Unless, of course, your grandma is a savage prank legend.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"664\" data-end=\"755\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"664\" data-end=\"753\"\u003eClick “Add to Cart” now and anonymously send someone a mouthful they’ll never forget.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"757\" data-end=\"760\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"762\" data-end=\"790\"\u003eWhy This Hits Different\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"792\" data-end=\"903\"\u003eSure, you could send flowers. But flowers wilt. Candy hearts are boring. And regular gummy bears? Snoozefest.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"905\" data-end=\"1284\"\u003eThese penis gummies, though? They’re unapologetically funny, deliciously fruity, and rainbow AF. They send a message that says, “I love you, I’m proud of you, and also, here’s a bag of dicks.” Whether it’s Pride Month, a birthday, Galentine’s, or just a Tuesday, these little guys get the reaction you’re really after - jaw-drop, laughter, and maybe even a photo for Instagram.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1286\" data-end=\"1289\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1291\" data-end=\"1320\"\u003eOne Gift, Endless Laughs\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1322\" data-end=\"1612\"\u003eImagine it. Your friend gets a discreet package in the mail. They open it up, see a bag bursting with bright, colorful penis gummies, and immediately spit out their coffee. They either laugh so hard they cry, or immediately eat one and ask what flavor “blue dick” is. Either way, you win.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cblockquote data-start=\"1614\" data-end=\"1657\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1616\" data-end=\"1657\"\u003e“Sent the bag and we had a good laugh.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/blockquote\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1659\" data-end=\"1733\"\u003eThat’s the whole point - laughs that linger long after the bag is empty.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1735\" data-end=\"1738\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1740\" data-end=\"1757\"\u003ePerfect For:\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1759\" data-end=\"2099\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1759\" data-end=\"1819\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1761\" data-end=\"1819\"\u003ePride Month celebrations that need a little extra flair.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1820\" data-end=\"1880\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1822\" data-end=\"1880\"\u003eBirthday gag gifts that beat another boring Amazon card.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1881\" data-end=\"1943\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1883\" data-end=\"1943\"\u003eGalentine’s parties where wine meets inappropriate snacks.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1944\" data-end=\"2018\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1946\" data-end=\"2018\"\u003eAnonymous edible pranks that leave people both confused and delighted.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2019\" data-end=\"2099\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2021\" data-end=\"2099\"\u003e“Just because” surprises when you want to drop candy chaos on someone’s day.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2101\" data-end=\"2104\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2106\" data-end=\"2123\"\u003eWhat You Get\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2125\" data-end=\"2352\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2125\" data-end=\"2204\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2127\" data-end=\"2204\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2127\" data-end=\"2170\"\u003e10 fruity rainbow-colored gummy penises\u003c\/strong\u003e in a colorful Pride-themed bag.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2205\" data-end=\"2245\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2207\" data-end=\"2245\"\u003eA perfect mix of sweetness and sass.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2246\" data-end=\"2302\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2248\" data-end=\"2302\"\u003e100 percent anonymous shipping - your secret’s safe.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2303\" data-end=\"2352\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2305\" data-end=\"2352\"\u003eA guaranteed story they’ll retell to friends.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2354\" data-end=\"2357\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2359\" data-end=\"2384\"\u003eHow to Pull This Off\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003col data-start=\"2386\" data-end=\"2647\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2386\" data-end=\"2484\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2389\" data-end=\"2484\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2389\" data-end=\"2422\"\u003eOrder your bag of gummy dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e - one for them, maybe one for yourself (research purposes).\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2485\" data-end=\"2546\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2488\" data-end=\"2546\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2488\" data-end=\"2511\"\u003eShip it anonymously\u003c\/strong\u003e so they have no idea it was you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2547\" data-end=\"2647\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2550\" data-end=\"2647\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2550\" data-end=\"2602\"\u003eWait for the texts, calls, or social media posts\u003c\/strong\u003e because they \u003cem data-start=\"2616\" data-end=\"2622\"\u003ewill\u003c\/em\u003e want to show this off.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ol\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2649\" data-end=\"2652\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2654\" data-end=\"2674\"\u003eThe Bottom Line\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2676\" data-end=\"2962\"\u003eThe \u003cstrong data-start=\"2680\" data-end=\"2731\"\u003eBag of Gummy D’s - Something I Know You’ll Love\u003c\/strong\u003e isn’t just candy. It’s a pride-filled, rainbow-wrapped edible prank that hits the sweet spot between hilarious and delicious. It works for friends, partners, exes you weirdly still talk to, and anyone with a good sense of humor.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2964\" data-end=\"3129\"\u003eStop overthinking it. \u003cstrong data-start=\"2986\" data-end=\"3031\"\u003eSend a bag of rainbow penis gummies today\u003c\/strong\u003e and give them the gift of laughter (and maybe a little choking hazard, but like, in a fun way).\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2964\" data-end=\"3129\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2029\" data-end=\"2228\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2029\" data-end=\"2043\"\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e If you are sending to someone else, make sure you put the recipient's name and address in the shipping option. Otherwise, it's you that ends up with the bag of Ds, albeit deservedly.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2230\" data-end=\"2293\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2230\" data-end=\"2291\"\u003eRecipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2295\" data-end=\"2415\"\u003e\u003cem data-start=\"2295\" data-end=\"2413\"\u003eBy ordering, you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Dicks By Mail","offers":[{"title":"Single","offer_id":41894107938900,"sku":"PRIDEBOD-1","price":15.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Double em!","offer_id":41894107971668,"sku":"PRIDEBOD-2","price":28.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Three - Do you really love me?","offer_id":41894108004436,"sku":"PRIDEBOD-3","price":41.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Four - Yes please, I'd like more","offer_id":41894108037204,"sku":"PRIDEBOD-4","price":52.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Five!","offer_id":42000522379348,"sku":"PRIDEBOD-5","price":60.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Six - send more dicks!","offer_id":41894108069972,"sku":"PRIDEBOD-6","price":69.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Ten - A whole lot of love","offer_id":41894108102740,"sku":"PRIDEBOD-10","price":99.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/bag-of-gummy-ds-something-i-know-youll-love-8872955.png?v=1779249067"},{"product_id":"spring-loaded-poop-emoji-glitter-cannon-prank","title":"Spring Loaded Poop Emoji Glitter Cannon Prank","description":"\u003ch2 data-start=\"178\" data-end=\"228\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eSpring Loaded Poop Emoji Glitter Cannon Prank\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"230\" data-end=\"333\"\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"230\" data-end=\"331\"\u003eBecause sometimes words just aren’t enough… you have to send someone a face full of sparkly poop.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"335\" data-end=\"682\"\u003eYou know that one person who’s been begging for a little “special attention”? Maybe it’s your ex, your roommate who keeps “borrowing” your stuff, or your friend who still owes you $20 from 2017. Now you can give them the ultimate gift - a \u003cstrong data-start=\"574\" data-end=\"615\"\u003espring loaded poop emoji glitter bomb\u003c\/strong\u003e that explodes in their face like a brown, sparkly middle finger.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"684\" data-end=\"955\"\u003eThis isn’t some sad sprinkle in an envelope. This is a \u003cstrong data-start=\"739\" data-end=\"765\"\u003eweaponized poop cannon\u003c\/strong\u003e in disguise, locked and loaded to fire an avalanche of glittery turds the moment they crack it open. And the best part? It ships 100% anonymously. You’re the ghost of petty revenge, baby.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"957\" data-end=\"1033\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"957\" data-end=\"1031\"\u003eOrder now before you change your mind and settle for something boring.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1035\" data-end=\"1038\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"1040\" data-end=\"1100\"\u003eWhy This Poop Cannon is a Work of Art in Petty Warfare\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1101\" data-end=\"1212\"\u003eThere are pranks, and then there are \u003cem data-start=\"1138\" data-end=\"1146\"\u003epranks\u003c\/em\u003e. This thing is like the Mona Lisa of revenge gifts. Here’s why:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1214\" data-end=\"1549\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1214\" data-end=\"1290\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1216\" data-end=\"1290\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1216\" data-end=\"1240\"\u003eDisguised packaging:\u003c\/strong\u003e Looks like a harmless incense tube until… boom.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1291\" data-end=\"1387\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1293\" data-end=\"1387\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1293\" data-end=\"1316\"\u003eExplosive delivery:\u003c\/strong\u003e The spring mechanism launches poop emoji confetti in all directions.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1388\" data-end=\"1489\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1390\" data-end=\"1489\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1390\" data-end=\"1430\"\u003eMaximum chaos, zero cleanup for you:\u003c\/strong\u003e They deal with the mess. You deal with the satisfaction.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1490\" data-end=\"1549\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1492\" data-end=\"1549\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1492\" data-end=\"1513\"\u003eUniversal appeal:\u003c\/strong\u003e Poop jokes never go out of style.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1551\" data-end=\"1701\"\u003eIf you’re looking for an \u003cstrong data-start=\"1576\" data-end=\"1595\"\u003eanonymous prank\u003c\/strong\u003e that’s equal parts savage and hilarious, this is your golden ticket - or rather, brown glittery ticket.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1703\" data-end=\"1706\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"1708\" data-end=\"1753\"\u003eThe Scene: Instant, Unforgettable Chaos\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1754\" data-end=\"1960\"\u003eImagine this. Your target receives a mysterious tube. Curiosity takes over. They pop it open. Suddenly - \u003cstrong data-start=\"1859\" data-end=\"1869\"\u003eKABOOM\u003c\/strong\u003e - a tidal wave of glittery poop emojis blasts across their floor, couch, hair, and soul.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1962\" data-end=\"2159\"\u003eIt’s too late for them to stop it. They’re sparkling like a fabulous turd, wondering what life choices brought them here. Meanwhile, you’re somewhere else, sipping coffee, grinning like a maniac.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2161\" data-end=\"2164\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"2166\" data-end=\"2187\"\u003eProduct Details\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2188\" data-end=\"2503\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2188\" data-end=\"2245\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2190\" data-end=\"2245\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2190\" data-end=\"2204\"\u003ePackaging:\u003c\/strong\u003e Fake incense tube for stealth delivery\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2246\" data-end=\"2293\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2248\" data-end=\"2293\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2248\" data-end=\"2262\"\u003eMechanism:\u003c\/strong\u003e Spring-loaded glitter cannon\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2294\" data-end=\"2354\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2296\" data-end=\"2354\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2296\" data-end=\"2308\"\u003ePayload:\u003c\/strong\u003e Poop emoji confetti for maximum humiliation\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2355\" data-end=\"2387\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2357\" data-end=\"2387\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2357\" data-end=\"2370\"\u003eShipping:\u003c\/strong\u003e 100% anonymous\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2388\" data-end=\"2503\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2390\" data-end=\"2503\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2390\" data-end=\"2404\"\u003eOccasions:\u003c\/strong\u003e Breakup joke, birthday surprise, revenge glitter bomb, poop-themed prank war, anonymous gag gift\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2505\" data-end=\"2508\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"2510\" data-end=\"2544\"\u003eWays to Take It Over the Top\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2545\" data-end=\"2787\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2545\" data-end=\"2637\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2547\" data-end=\"2637\"\u003ePair it with a card from our \u003cstrong data-start=\"2576\" data-end=\"2606\"\u003eglitter bomb greeting card\u003c\/strong\u003e collection for a double hit.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2638\" data-end=\"2726\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2640\" data-end=\"2726\"\u003eSend it alongside our \u003cstrong data-start=\"2662\" data-end=\"2684\"\u003eEat a Bag of Dicks\u003c\/strong\u003e gummies for the ultimate one-two punch.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2727\" data-end=\"2787\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2729\" data-end=\"2787\"\u003eMail it during a holiday for extra “Why me?!” confusion.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2789\" data-end=\"2792\"\u003e\n\u003ch3 data-start=\"2794\" data-end=\"2810\"\u003eFinal Word\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2811\" data-end=\"2878\"\u003eLife’s too short for boring revenge. Go big. Go sparkly. Go poop.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2880\" data-end=\"3124\"\u003eThe \u003cstrong data-start=\"2884\" data-end=\"2933\"\u003eSpring Loaded Poop Emoji Glitter Cannon Prank\u003c\/strong\u003e is your fast-track to legend status in the prank hall of fame. They’ll be picking glitter out of their carpet for months, and every time they find another poop emoji, they’ll think of you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3126\" data-end=\"3189\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3126\" data-end=\"3187\"\u003eClick Add to Cart and let the shitty glitter storm begin.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3126\" data-end=\"3189\"\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e \u003c\/strong\u003eMake sure you put the recipient's \u003cspan\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003eand\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003ei\u003cwbr\u003en the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/wbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan size=\"4\"\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Dicks By Mail - Anonymously mail a bag of dicks","offers":[{"title":"Poop Emojis","offer_id":41913576816724,"sku":"POOPBOMB","price":24.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Double Poop Emojis","offer_id":41913576849492,"sku":"DOUBLEPOOPBOMB","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Combo Poop \u0026 Trouser Snake Confetti","offer_id":41913576882260,"sku":"POOPANDDICKBOMB","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Combo Poop \u0026 Baby Batter Confetti","offer_id":41913576915028,"sku":"POOPANDJIZZBOMB","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Combo Poop Confetti \u0026 Glitter","offer_id":41913576947796,"sku":"POOPANDGLITTERBOMB","price":27.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Combo Poop \u0026 Trouser Snake \u0026 Baby Batter","offer_id":41913576980564,"sku":"POOPANDDICKANDJIZZBOMB","price":29.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/the-poop-prank-bundle-5117254.jpg?v=1755878741"},{"product_id":"happy-fin-surprise-glitter-card","title":"Happy F'in Surprise Glitter Card","description":"\u003ch2 data-start=\"151\" data-end=\"187\"\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eHappy F’in Surprise Glitter Card\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"189\" data-end=\"309\"\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"189\" data-end=\"307\"\u003eIt’s the birthday card that says “I care” and then immediately says “Screw you” in a sparkling explosion of chaos.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"311\" data-end=\"701\"\u003eIf you want to make someone laugh, gasp, swear, and regret opening their mail all in one glorious moment, this is it. The \u003cem data-start=\"433\" data-end=\"467\"\u003eHappy F’in Surprise Glitter Card\u003c\/em\u003e is not your grandma’s Hallmark. This bad boy hides a glitter payload that goes off the second they open it, covering their clothes, hair, and possibly their cat in enough sparkles to make them look like a low-budget Vegas showgirl.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"703\" data-end=\"869\"\u003eYou’re not just sending a card. You’re sending a memory. And by “memory,” I mean a glittery mess they’ll be vacuuming for the next six months while thinking of you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"871\" data-end=\"957\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"871\" data-end=\"955\"\u003eOrder now. Make them laugh. Make them cry. Make them sparkle against their will.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"959\" data-end=\"962\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"964\" data-end=\"998\"\u003eWhy This Card Wins Every Time\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1000\" data-end=\"1312\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1000\" data-end=\"1071\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1002\" data-end=\"1071\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1002\" data-end=\"1020\"\u003eIt’s anonymous\u003c\/strong\u003e so they’ll have no idea which “friend” did this.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1072\" data-end=\"1142\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1074\" data-end=\"1142\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1074\" data-end=\"1096\"\u003eIt’s instant chaos\u003c\/strong\u003e - they open it, boom, it’s raining glitter.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1143\" data-end=\"1235\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1145\" data-end=\"1235\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1145\" data-end=\"1172\"\u003eIt works for everything\u003c\/strong\u003e - birthdays, revenge, or just because you’re a lovable jerk.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1236\" data-end=\"1312\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1238\" data-end=\"1312\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1238\" data-end=\"1277\"\u003eIt’s impossible to clean completely\u003c\/strong\u003e - the gift that keeps on giving.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1314\" data-end=\"1458\"\u003eThis isn’t just a glitter card prank. This is the \u003cem data-start=\"1364\" data-end=\"1389\"\u003eprank card with glitter\u003c\/em\u003e that turns your “Happy Birthday” into “Ha, clean that up, sucker.”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1460\" data-end=\"1463\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1465\" data-end=\"1498\"\u003eHow The Glitter Ambush Works\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003col data-start=\"1500\" data-end=\"1745\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1500\" data-end=\"1553\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1503\" data-end=\"1553\"\u003eYou order it like the sneaky mastermind you are.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1554\" data-end=\"1622\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1557\" data-end=\"1622\"\u003eWe prep the card with enough glitter to make a unicorn jealous.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1623\" data-end=\"1676\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1626\" data-end=\"1676\"\u003eWe mail it directly to your unsuspecting target.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1677\" data-end=\"1745\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1680\" data-end=\"1745\"\u003eThey open it thinking, “Aw, how sweet…” and then it’s too late.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ol\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1747\" data-end=\"1829\"\u003eGlitter’s in their hair, on their couch, and somehow inside their shoe. You win.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1831\" data-end=\"1834\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1836\" data-end=\"1866\"\u003eReal-Life Glitter Carnage\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1868\" data-end=\"2102\"\u003eWe’ve had customers say it’s the funniest and most evil thing they’ve ever sent. Some relationships have grown stronger from the laughter. Others… not so much. But all of them have one thing in common - \u003cstrong data-start=\"2071\" data-end=\"2099\"\u003enobody forgets this card\u003c\/strong\u003e.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2104\" data-end=\"2107\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2109\" data-end=\"2129\"\u003eProduct Details\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2131\" data-end=\"2446\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2131\" data-end=\"2202\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2133\" data-end=\"2202\"\u003eStandard-size folded greeting card made from high-quality cardstock\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2203\" data-end=\"2277\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2205\" data-end=\"2277\"\u003ePacked with non-toxic, easy-to-clean glitter (but honestly, good luck)\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2278\" data-end=\"2304\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2280\" data-end=\"2304\"\u003eShips 100% anonymously\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2305\" data-end=\"2367\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2307\" data-end=\"2367\"\u003eBlank interior for your own message - sweet, mean, or both\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2368\" data-end=\"2446\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2370\" data-end=\"2446\"\u003ePerfect for birthdays, office gags, petty revenge, or random acts of chaos\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2448\" data-end=\"2451\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2453\" data-end=\"2467\"\u003eYour Move\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2469\" data-end=\"2632\"\u003eYou can send a boring “Congrats” card that ends up in the trash… or you can send a \u003cem data-start=\"2552\" data-end=\"2586\"\u003eHappy F’in Surprise Glitter Card\u003c\/em\u003e that ends up everywhere else in their life.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2634\" data-end=\"2747\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2634\" data-end=\"2745\"\u003eClick “Add to Cart” now and give someone the sparkling disaster they never asked for but will never forget.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cem\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e \u003c\/strong\u003eMake sure you put the recipient's \u003cspan\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003eand\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003ei\u003cwbr\u003en the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/wbr\u003e\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan size=\"4\"\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Dicks By Mail","offers":[{"title":"Activated","offer_id":41925166530644,"sku":"gbcFING2-8","price":9.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Not Activated","offer_id":41925166563412,"sku":"gbcFING2","price":9.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/happy-fin-surprise-glitter-card-2326635.jpg?v=1755878733"},{"product_id":"eat-my-a-chocolate-treats","title":"Eat My --- Chocolate Treats","description":"\u003ch2 data-start=\"209\" data-end=\"293\"\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eEat My --- Chocolate Treats\u003c\/strong\u003e - The Sweetest Kick in the Pants You’ll Ever Give\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"295\" data-end=\"428\"\u003eIf you’ve ever wanted to say “kiss my ass” but in a way that’s edible, delicious, and absolutely unforgettable, here’s your moment.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"430\" data-end=\"650\"\u003eMeet \u003cstrong data-start=\"435\" data-end=\"469\"\u003eEat My --- Chocolate Treats\u003c\/strong\u003e - handcrafted milk chocolate molded into realistic buttholes, packaged in a cheeky gift box, and ready to be the most scandalous snack your recipient has ever put in their mouth.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"652\" data-end=\"772\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"652\" data-end=\"677\"\u003eClick Add to Cart now\u003c\/strong\u003e and send a gift that’s equal parts sweet and “oh my god, did they really just send me this?”\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"774\" data-end=\"777\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"779\" data-end=\"825\"\u003eWhy This Naughty Chocolate is Pure Genius\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"827\" data-end=\"1014\"\u003eMost chocolates are boring. Heart-shaped, wrapped in gold foil, and forgotten by Tuesday. But these? These are chocolates that people remember. These are chocolates people \u003cem data-start=\"999\" data-end=\"1011\"\u003etalk about\u003c\/em\u003e.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1016\" data-end=\"1168\"\u003eThey’re the perfect blend of quality and comedy - rich, creamy milk chocolate crafted by people who clearly have no shame and a wicked sense of humor.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1170\" data-end=\"1336\"\u003eWhen you send these, you’re not just gifting candy. You’re gifting an \u003cstrong data-start=\"1240\" data-end=\"1254\"\u003eexperience\u003c\/strong\u003e. An awkward, hilarious, melt-in-your-mouth moment that no one will ever forget.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1338\" data-end=\"1341\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1343\" data-end=\"1365\"\u003eWhat’s in the Box\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1367\" data-end=\"1446\"\u003eThe name says it all, but here’s the breakdown of your \u003cstrong data-start=\"1422\" data-end=\"1443\"\u003echocolates\u003c\/strong\u003e:\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"1448\" data-end=\"1793\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1448\" data-end=\"1527\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1450\" data-end=\"1527\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1450\" data-end=\"1479\"\u003eRealistic wrinkly shapes\u003c\/strong\u003e (yes, really) molded in smooth milk chocolate\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1528\" data-end=\"1583\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1530\" data-end=\"1583\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1530\" data-end=\"1549\"\u003eCheeky gift box\u003c\/strong\u003e for maximum presentation impact\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1584\" data-end=\"1652\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1586\" data-end=\"1652\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1586\" data-end=\"1609\"\u003eHandcrafted quality\u003c\/strong\u003e so they’re as tasty as they are shocking\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1653\" data-end=\"1728\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1655\" data-end=\"1728\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1655\" data-end=\"1677\"\u003eAnonymous shipping\u003c\/strong\u003e for that “oh god, who sent this?” mystery factor\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"1729\" data-end=\"1793\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1731\" data-end=\"1793\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"1731\" data-end=\"1747\"\u003ePerfect size\u003c\/strong\u003e for pranks, parties, or pranks \u003cem data-start=\"1779\" data-end=\"1783\"\u003eat\u003c\/em\u003e parties\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"1795\" data-end=\"1798\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"1800\" data-end=\"1814\"\u003eThe Scene\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"1816\" data-end=\"2029\"\u003ePicture this: it’s Valentine’s Day. Your partner is expecting flowers, maybe some boring store-bought chocolates. Instead, they open the box and are greeted by a lineup of perfectly detailed chocolate holes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2031\" data-end=\"2092\"\u003eThey laugh. They blush. They take a bite. They laugh again.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2094\" data-end=\"2280\"\u003eOr maybe you’re sending them to a friend for their birthday. They rip into the package expecting a generic sweet. What they get is a lesson in why you’re the funniest person they know.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2282\" data-end=\"2331\"\u003eThis is the chocolate equivalent of a mic drop.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2333\" data-end=\"2336\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2338\" data-end=\"2354\"\u003ePerfect For\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cul data-start=\"2356\" data-end=\"2725\"\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2356\" data-end=\"2424\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2358\" data-end=\"2424\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2358\" data-end=\"2384\"\u003eValentine’s Day pranks\u003c\/strong\u003e that keep the romance but add a twist\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2425\" data-end=\"2492\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2427\" data-end=\"2492\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2427\" data-end=\"2449\"\u003eRomantic gag gifts\u003c\/strong\u003e for couples who laugh at the weird stuff\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2493\" data-end=\"2545\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2495\" data-end=\"2545\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2495\" data-end=\"2518\"\u003eAnonymous surprises\u003c\/strong\u003e that leave them guessing\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2546\" data-end=\"2599\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2548\" data-end=\"2599\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2548\" data-end=\"2566\"\u003eBirthday jokes\u003c\/strong\u003e that beat any boring gift card\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2600\" data-end=\"2664\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2602\" data-end=\"2664\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2602\" data-end=\"2631\"\u003eBachelorette party favors\u003c\/strong\u003e that actually make people howl\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli data-start=\"2665\" data-end=\"2725\"\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2667\" data-end=\"2725\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"2667\" data-end=\"2691\"\u003eEdible novelty gifts\u003c\/strong\u003e that taste as good as they look\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003chr data-start=\"2727\" data-end=\"2730\"\u003e\n\u003ch2 data-start=\"2732\" data-end=\"2753\"\u003eHow People React\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2755\" data-end=\"2949\"\u003eWhile no one’s left a review yet for these exact treats, we know the vibe. It’s a mix of shock, laughter, and that little smirk people get when they know they’re about to do something naughty.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"2951\" data-end=\"3102\"\u003eThey’ll tell their friends. They’ll post it on Instagram. And you’ll sit back knowing you’ve pulled off a prank that’s both ridiculous and delicious.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp data-start=\"3786\" data-end=\"3850\"\u003e\u003cstrong data-start=\"3786\" data-end=\"3811\"\u003eClick Add to Cart now\u003c\/strong\u003e and put a little cheek in their day.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e Make sure you put the recipient's \u003cspan\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e and \u003cspan\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e in the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan size=\"4\"\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"DicksByMail","offers":[{"title":"One \/ No Sleeve","offer_id":42731833032788,"sku":"EMA","price":17.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"One \/ Live Fast","offer_id":43763551010900,"sku":"EMA,LIVEFASTSLEEVE","price":17.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Double (10% Off Single Price per Box) \/ No Sleeve","offer_id":42731833065556,"sku":"EMA-2","price":31.48,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Double (10% Off Single Price per Box) \/ Live Fast","offer_id":43763551043668,"sku":"EMA-2,LIVEFASTSLEEVE-2","price":32.38,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Triple (20% Off Single Price per Box) \/ No Sleeve","offer_id":42731833098324,"sku":"EMA-3","price":41.98,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Triple (20% Off Single Price per Box) \/ Live Fast","offer_id":43763551076436,"sku":"EMA-3,LIVEFASTSLEEVE-3","price":43.18,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Five (25% Off Single Price per Box) \/ No Sleeve","offer_id":43763551109204,"sku":"EMA-5","price":65.59,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Five (25% Off Single Price per Box) \/ Live Fast","offer_id":43763551141972,"sku":"EMA-5,LIVEFASTSLEEVE-5","price":67.46,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ten (30% Off Single Price per Box) \/ No Sleeve","offer_id":43764194312276,"sku":"EMA-10","price":122.43,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Ten (30% Off Single Price per Box) \/ Live Fast","offer_id":43764194345044,"sku":"EMA-10,LIVEFASTSLEEVE-10","price":125.93,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/eat-my-cheeky-chocolate-treats-3104685.jpg?v=1773200470"},{"product_id":"eat-a-dick-the-chocolate-dick-copy","title":"Trick Or Treat - Halloween Themed Chocolate Dick","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eDick-or-Treat! \u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eLimited Edition Halloween Chocolate Dick\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eThis candy isn't one you had out to the kids on the block, this 5.5 inch chocolate dick is the perfect trick (and treat), to bring to your adult costume party or to play a prank and send to your friend anonymously.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eWrapped in our Trick-or-Treat sleeve with “Happy Halloween” screaming across it, this sweet and slightly scandalous treat is the ultimate prank-gift crossover. It’s equal parts trick, treat, and WTF did you just send me?\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003ePerfect for:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003e Your friend who loves Halloween a little too much\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\u003cspan\u003eThat ex who ghosted you last October\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cspan\u003eAnyone who deserves a good laugh (or a good scare)\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003eEach chocolate masterpiece is hand-poured, solid milk chocolate, and 100% ready to haunt someone’s sweet tooth. \u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eWarning: Side effects may include uncontrollable laughter, blushing, and proudly yelling “Dick-or-Treat, bitches!”\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eLimited Halloween drop, once they’re gone, they’re six feet under.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e Make sure you put the recipient's \u003cspan\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003eand\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003ein the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cspan size=\"4\"\u003e*By ordering you are agreeing to the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy found at the checkout page and page footer*\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"DickAtYourDoor","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":42613165293652,"sku":"HALLOWEENCHOCHOCOLATED","price":24.49,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/trick-or-treat-halloween-themed-chocolate-dick-5297338.jpg?v=1761334315"},{"product_id":"surprise-gourmet-chocolate-gag-gift-poop-shaped-chocolate","title":"The Dollop - Poop-Shaped Chocolate Surprise Gourmet Chocolate Gag Gift","description":"\u003cp\u003eGive someone the ultimate prank gift that actually tastes amazing. Inside this plain, anonymous box is a premium milk-chocolate piece molded into a cheeky poop shaped rich, creamy, and completely edible. It’s perfect for birthdays, breakups, coworker roasts, or any time you want to send a hilarious (and tasty!) message.\u003cbr\u003eWhat’s included:\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eOne realistic poop-shaped premium milk chocolate.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDiscreet plain box- no branding, no receipt, no clue who sent it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eDelivered anonymously for maximum prank impact.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWhy you’ll love it:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eWay funnier than a card.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eTaste beats the joke every time.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eWorks for anyone with a sense of humor.\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003eEasy, memorable, and guaranteed to get a reaction.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eHow to use it:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cbr\u003eAdd recipient name \u0026amp; shipping address at checkout.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSit back while they open the box… confusion. laughter. then delicious chocolate.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eEnjoy your moment of comedic revenge (or gift-giving glory).\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cspan\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eIMPORTANT:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/span\u003e\u003cem\u003e Make sure you put the recipient's \u003cspan\u003ename\u003c\/span\u003e and \u003cspan\u003eaddress\u003c\/span\u003e in the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the poop. \u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"DickAtYourDoor","offers":[{"title":"Single","offer_id":42731846107220,"sku":"ES-1","price":15.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Double Shits (Save 10%)","offer_id":42731846139988,"sku":"ES-2","price":28.78,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false},{"title":"Triple Shits (Save 20%)","offer_id":42731846172756,"sku":"ES-3","price":38.38,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/products\/the-poop-prank-bundle-5734396.jpg?v=1762196781"},{"product_id":"get-the-dickle","title":"Get The Dickle","description":"\u003cp\u003eGet the Dickle is the chaotic adult party game guaranteed to turn any night into absolute mayhem. Perfect for parties, white elephant exchanges, bachelor parties, game nights, and hilarious gag gifts, this fast-paced game keeps everyone laughing from start to finish. Easy to learn, wildly inappropriate, and unforgettable after a few drinks, Get the Dickle is the perfect funny gift for adults with immature humor and no self-control\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePerfect for Parties - Great for groups of 3–10.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e2+ Players - An adult spin on the classic game.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eEndless laughs - Just wait for the reactions\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003ePerfect Gift - Prepare for laughter!\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Dicks By Mail - Anonymously mail a bag of dicks","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":46864777085012,"sku":"DICKLEGAME","price":25.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/files\/get-the-dickle-2714653.jpg?v=1778751924"}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0790\/0465\/collections\/all-our-best-sellers-3970672.jpg?v=1755878674","url":"https:\/\/dicksbymail.com\/collections\/all-our-best-sellers\/anonymous-pranks.oembed","provider":"Dicks By Mail - Anonymously mail a bag of dicks","version":"1.0","type":"link"}