$9.99 USD
Normal greeting cards are boring. You open them, maybe there’s some half-assed joke inside, maybe twenty bucks if you’re lucky, and then you toss them in the trash.
Not this bad boy.
The EXPLODING Glitter Bomb Card is not here to say “Happy Birthday” or “Get Well Soon.” It’s here to say, I love you enough to ruin your day with microscopic shiny chaos that will haunt you for months. You know what’s better than sending a boring thank-you card? Sending one that detonates into a glitter apocalypse the moment it’s opened.
If you’ve ever wanted to combine thoughtful with evil, this is your chance. Pick a theme, ship it anonymously, and watch your target get absolutely annihilated by a blizzard of sparkly hell.
Send it now. Laugh forever.
Instant mess, zero damage – It’s petty, not destructive. The perfect level of evil.
Endless reminder – Glitter sticks to everything, so they’ll be finding it in their socks, hair, and bathroom for months.
Full anonymity – No fingerprints, no trail. You are a ghost.
Imagine this: your ex, your friend, your brother, whoever – they check the mail and see a cute little greeting card. Their guard is down. They’re expecting heartfelt words or maybe a joke.
Then… BOOM.
A payload of glitter or dick confetti bursts into the air like a Vegas showgirl exploded. It’s in their car vents. It’s in their phone case. The dog’s now wearing it. Weeks later, they’re still discovering tiny reminders of the day you won.
“I sent the anonymous package to my sister, she laughed so hard!!”
“I didn’t see it go down but I did see the glitter on my coworker’s boots. 10/10. ❤”
“Sent the exploding card to an ex, he opened it in his car and said he vacuumed multiple times and it was still there. Job well done.”
Folded greeting card rigged with a glitter or dick confetti bomb.
Multiple hilarious themes to choose from.
Ships completely anonymously – no one will know it’s you.
A perfectly balanced prank that’s funny, infuriating, and unforgettable.
Breakup laugh – Because closure is overrated.
Birthday surprise – Outshine the cake, literally.
Petty revenge – The safe, legal way to get even.
Just because – No reason needed for glitter-based terrorism.
Pick your card theme.
Decide between glitter or dick confetti (or go wild and mix).
Enter their address, keep yours out of it.
Ship it. Wait. Enjoy the chaos.
The fun part is they can never truly clean it up. Six months later they’ll still be muttering your name when they find glitter in their underwear drawer.
You’re not buying a piece of cardstock. You’re buying a moment – a glitter-coated memory that will be retold at parties, group chats, and therapy sessions for years to come.
Click Add to Cart now and ship an EXPLODING Glitter Bomb Card. Because if you’re going to say it, say it with sparkle-fueled destruction.
IMPORTANT: Make sure you put the recipient's name and address in the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly.
**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**
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