Merry DicksMas Greeting Card

Merry DicksMas - The Only Holiday Card That Truly Says “I Care”

Forget chestnuts roasting on an open fire. This Christmas, let’s talk about dicks. Specifically, the Merry DicksMas Greeting Card - the festive, joy-filled way to let someone know you’re thinking about them… and also about genitals.

This isn’t your grandma’s holiday card with snowmen and Bible verses. This is high-quality cardstock printed with “Merry DicksMas” front and center, ready to make any recipient laugh, choke on their eggnog, or question your mental stability. Pair it with glitter, dick confetti, or even a full bag of dicks for the ultimate holiday gag gift.

Click Add to Cart now, because nothing says “season’s greetings” like a tasteful reminder of the male anatomy.

Why You Absolutely Need To Send This

Because holiday cards are boring. Every year it’s the same dull crap - “Wishing you peace and joy,” “Hope your family is blessed,” blah blah blah. Snooze fest. The Merry DicksMas Greeting Card is for people who want to make Christmas fun again.

Instead of another Hallmark snoozer, you’re sending something that will be remembered, photographed, and possibly banned from future family events. That’s a win.

Imagine This Scene

It’s Christmas morning. Your target is sipping coffee in their festive pajamas, surrounded by gifts and fake cheer. They pick up your envelope, smiling, thinking you sent a heartfelt note. They open it. Boom. “Merry DicksMas” in big, bold letters, staring them down like Rudolph after three shots of tequila.

If you added glitter or dick confetti, it’s now raining tiny penis shapes all over their carpet. They’re horrified. They’re laughing. They’re swearing. And you? You’re the mysterious holiday hero who pulled it off without leaving a trace.

What Makes The Merry DicksMas Card So Perfect

• Printed on high-quality cardstock that feels expensive, even though the message is not

• Folded holiday greeting card with “Merry DicksMas” front and center

• Ships 100 percent anonymously so no one knows you’re the festive freak behind it

• Can be paired with glitter, dick confetti, or a bag of dicks for extra chaos

• Blank interior so you can write something sweet, savage, or both

Perfect For

• Christmas pranks that become instant legends

• Holiday gag gifts for your most immature friends

• Stocking stuffers that get actual laughs, not fake smiles

• Revenge wrapped in tinsel

• Spicing up your Secret Santa game with something unforgettable

Real Customer Feedback

“The best card ever. Thank you so much.”
“Fun card!!!!”
“That was the perfect mix of shock and laughter.”

The Secret Sauce

This card isn’t just a piece of paper. It’s a calculated holiday prank weapon. The design is innocent enough from the outside, but the inside hits like a drunk uncle at a family reunion. Add-ons like glitter and confetti take it from “funny” to “I’m going to remember this for the rest of my life” levels of chaos.

Bottom Line

The Merry DicksMas Greeting Card is the quickest, easiest way to turn a standard Christmas into a hilariously inappropriate memory. It’s affordable, it’s fast, and it ships without your name attached. Whether you’re spreading joy, revenge, or pure mischief, this card gets the job done.

Click Add to Cart now and make someone’s holiday… deeply weird.