Keep Calm and Eat a Bag of Dicks Magnet

Keep Calm and Eat a Bag of Dicks Magnet - The Rude Gift That Sticks Around

Let’s be real, sometimes a text or meme just isn’t enough. You need something physical. Something that stays. Something that smacks them in the face with your love… and by love, I mean an obnoxious, passive-aggressive middle finger disguised as “home décor.”

That’s where the Keep Calm and Eat a Bag of Dicks Magnet comes in.

This little rectangle of joy isn’t just a magnet. It’s a permanent reminder that you’re both funny and a little bit evil. Every time they grab a beer, get the milk, or reach for their leftover pizza, they’ll be greeted with your not-so-subtle message. It’s petty. It’s perfect. And it sticks. Literally.

Click Add to Cart now and cement your status as the funniest, most savage gift-giver they know.

Why This Is the Perfect Gift

Because flowers die. Chocolates get eaten. A magnet stays put until the end of time. It’s the gift that keeps on trolling, from fridges to lockers to toolboxes.

It works for stocking stuffers, white elephant exchanges, bachelor party favors, or just because you woke up today and decided to stir the pot. Best part? It ships discreetly so no one will know it’s coming until they rip open the package and see your sarcastic masterpiece.

What You’re Really Sending

You’re not just mailing them a magnet. You’re sending:

• A statement piece that screams personality

• High-quality printing so the message pops every time

• Stick-anywhere versatility for fridges, lockers, toolboxes, metal doors, filing cabinets

• Stealthy shipping so they never see it coming

• A built-in conversation starter or argument starter depending on your target

The Scenario

Picture this.
You order the Keep Calm and Eat a Bag of Dicks Magnet. It ships quietly, like a little assassin of humor.

They open it. Confusion. Then realization. Then either uncontrollable laughter or complete outrage. Either way, you win.

The magnet goes on the fridge. Days turn into weeks. Weeks turn into months. By the time they finally take it down, that phrase is burned into their memory. You’ll still be laughing.

Perfect For

• Stocking stuffers that leave a bigger impression than candy

• Fridge or locker pranks for friends, family, or that one buddy who still owes you $50

• Bachelor or bachelorette parties where nothing is sacred

• White elephant gifts when you want to dominate the gift exchange

• Add-ons for bigger prank packages like a bag of gummy dicks or dick confetti

Customer Reviews

"Those magnets are all over this city. 😀"

"Sent this to my friend and his brother as a joke, we always love to mess with each other and this was the best way to do it."

"I am convinced though that this silly package helped them more than anyone could have imagined. I plan on sending multiple dicks in the future! I would suggest that you buy the dicks and a fridge magnet, this way you can commemorate the occasion and remember it forever!"

Why It Works So Well

This magnet is low effort, high impact. You’re not spending a fortune, you’re not overthinking it, and you’re still making a huge impression. It’s cheap, small, easy to mail, and yet it packs a punch every single time they open the fridge.

It’s not just a gag gift. It’s long-term comedy real estate.

Final Call

You could send another boring card or gift card. Or you could send this. The Keep Calm and Eat a Bag of Dicks Magnet is the small gift they’ll never forget or forgive. And isn’t that the whole point?

Click Add to Cart now and put your message where they can’t ignore it.

IMPORTANT: Make sure you put the recipient's name and address in the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. 

**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**

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