Spring Loaded Dick Bomb!

Spring Loaded Dick Bomb!

Because life’s too short not to blast your friends in the face with exploding dicks.

Ever wished you could perfectly capture the magic of a “WTF just happened?!” moment? Something so unexpected, so wildly inappropriate, that your target is left gasping, laughing, and sweeping up tiny penis confetti for weeks? Enter theSpring Loaded Dick Bomb, the glitter-dick-packed, prank-masterpiece disguised as a totally innocent incense tube… untilBOOM.

In one glorious split-second, their world goes from “Hmm, what’s this?” toexploding dicks everywhere. Not metaphorical dicks. Not a polite “eat a bag of dicks” greeting card. No, we’re talkingreal, tangible, shinydick confetti flying through the air like a glittery tsunami of shame.

So yeah, if you’ve ever wanted to send the ultimate “I love you but I also hate you” message,this is your weapon of choice. Scroll down, smash theAdd to Cart button, and get ready to become the undisputed champion of petty revenge.

Why You Need a Dick Glitter Bomb in Your Life

TheSpring Loaded Dick Bomb isn’t just a prank. It’s performance art. Here’s why it’s so damn satisfying:

• It’s 100% unexpected – Nobody thinks, “Oh, this innocent-looking incense tube is gonna shoot a dick explosion in my face.”
  

• It’s petty perfection – Revenge without the drama. Laughter without the cops.
  

• It’s customizable – Addjizz confetti, more glitter, or go full chaos with both.
  

• It’s not just for enemies – Works just as well for bachelorette parties, birthdays, or the friend who “accidentally” ruined your favorite shirt.
  

The Art of the Exploding Dick

Picture this:

They pick up the package. “Hmm… what’s this?”
They open it slowly.
You’re somewhere across town, phone in hand, waiting like a deranged Bond villain.
Sprrrrrang! Aspring loaded dick bomb erupts in a blinding storm ofpenis confetti.

And just like that, they’re in the middle of aglitter dick apocalypse. It’s in their hair. It’s in their shoes. It’s on their dog. Weeks later, they’ll still be finding little sparkly dicks in the couch cushions.

Real Reviews From People Just As Twisted As You

“He loved the dicks, he had to dump out his shoes after it blew all over him……”
“Definitely loved to prank my bestie! Let’s just say I won!”
 “One of my best friends and her daughter both wore glittery outfits to my Halloween party. I am still finding glitter. And after several weeks of them laughing about it, I had to seek my revenge quietly and carefully. The only obvious solution was a dick glitter bomb. I waited eagerly in anticipation for my phone to ring. And when it did the names I was called and the giggles I had made it all worth it. The follow up texts from the glitter dick finding over the next several days not only made me feel like it was revenge well served but also made me realize that therapy isn’t necessary. The only thing I need is dick glitter bombs. I’m a lot happier now. Thanks dick glitter bombs!”

The Specs (AKA What You’re Really Paying For)

• Disguise: Looks like a realistic incense tube
  

• Mechanism: Spring loaded container that firesconfetti dicks with shocking force
  

• Extras: Add jizz confetti, glitter, or both for maximum chaos
  

• Delivery: 100% anonymous, no return address, no snitching
  

• Uses: Anonymous prank, hilarious gag gift, bachelorette party chaos, petty revenge against friends
  

• From: The masters of prank warfare,DicksByMail
  

Why It Works Better Than Any Lame Prank You’ve Tried

Anyone can send a dumb meme or say “eat a bag of dicks” in a group chat. That’s amateur hour. But aspring loaded penis bomb? That’s a statement. It’s personal. It’s physical comedy. It’s something they’ll be talking about for years. Hell, you might even earn legendary status in your friend group asthat person, the one who pulled off the perfectglitter dick bomb strike.

Do It. You Know You Want To.

Your future victim is out there right now, living their life, blissfully unaware that their carpet, clothes, and cat are about to getcovered in exploding dicks. Don’t deny yourself this joy.

Hit thatAdd to Cart button. Send theSpring Loaded Dick Bomb. And bask in the glow of knowing you just unleashed a wave of glittery chaos that’ll haunt them for weeks.

IMPORTANT: Make sure you put the recipient's name and address in the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the dick bomb, albeit deservedly. 

**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**

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