Eat a Dick - The Chocolate Dick

Eat a Dick – The Chocolate Dick

Solid chocolate. Solid insult. Solid gold prank.

You know what’s better than sending someone flowers? Sending them agiant chocolate dick they have to unwrap, stare at, and decide if they’re gonna bite the tip first or go straight for the base.

TheEat a Dick – Chocolate Dick is not subtle. It’s not romantic (unless your romance involves filthy jokes). It’s a big, solid, 4-to-5.5 inchchocolate penis made from gluten-free Peruvian cacao, and it shows up in a sleek black box like some luxury jewelry… if the “jewel” was a perfectly molded cocoa cock.

And the best part? It ships100% anonymously. No sender info. No return address. Just pure, edible confusion delivered right to their door.

So yeah, if you’ve got a friend, ex, sibling, or Valentine who deserves a big chocolate middle finger, this is it. Smash thatAdd to Cart button and let the cocoa chaos begin.

Why You Need to Send a Chocolate Penis

TheChocolate Dick is the perfect edible “F you” for any occasion:

• It’s edible art – Made from high-quality gluten-free Peruvian cacao, it actually tastes amazing.
  

• It’s a visual gut punch – They open the box and immediately regret their life choices.
  

• It’s versatile – Works for birthdays, bachelorette parties, Valentine’s Day, revenge gifts, or “just because.”
  

• It’s anonymous – They’ll never know it was you… unless you’re giggling too hard to keep the secret.
  

The Scene You’re Creating

Imagine this:

They get a package. Looks fancy. They open it expecting fine chocolates or maybe a nice watch. Nope. It’s agiant chocolate cock staring them in the face like,“Hey there, champ. Eat me.”

They laugh. They take a picture. They send it to three friends. Then they either eat it (because chocolate is chocolate) or put it on display like a weird edible trophy. Either way, you win.

Real Reviews from People Who Went There

“Great way to prank your best friend or not-so-best friend, anonymous and hilarious.”
“Bought it for a friend as a gag gift and it arrived on Valentine’s Day, she opened it in front of her 10-year-old son who won’t stop asking questions.”
 “Sent it to my sister and she absolutely died laughing, she loved it.”

The Delicious Details

• Size: 4 to 5.5 inches, 3 to 4 oz of solid chocolate goodness
  

• Material: Gluten-free Peruvian cacao – because even insults should taste gourmet
  

• Packaging: Sleek black box that screams “classy” until you open it
  

• Extras: Optional upgraded gift box for maximum surprise factor
  

• Delivery: 100% anonymous – the mystery is half the fun
  

• Use Cases: Anonymous prank, birthday/gag gift, bachelorette party, Valentine’s Day joke, breakup revenge, just because you can
  

Why It Works Every. Single. Time.

Because even if they hate you, they can’t hate chocolate.
Because nothing breaks tension like opening a box to find abig chocolate penis staring back at you.
Because this is a prank that’s edible, harmless, and yet deeply personal.

Seriously, your “eat a dick chocolate” moment will live rent-free in their head for years. It’s a conversation starter, a photo op, and a power move all in one shiny cocoa package.

Send It. Bite It. Love It.

Here’s the play:

• ClickAdd to Cart.
  

• Enter their address.
  

• Sit back and wait for the confused text, the awkward photo, or the phone call that starts with “What the hell, man?”
  

It’s that simple. You can send abig chocolate dick for less than the price of a boring bouquet, and it’ll get way more laughs.

So do it. Make someone’s day. Make them eat a dick.
Achocolate dick.

IMPORTANT: Make sure you put the recipient's name and address in the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly. 

**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**

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