$19.99 USD
Because sometimes the best way to say “I love you” is with a box of edible asses.
Move over heart-shaped chocolates, there’s a new Valentine’s Day MVP in town –Eat Ass Chocolate Buttholes. These handcrafted milk chocolate masterpieces are molded into the most realistic little starfish you’ve ever seen. They’re sweet, cheeky, and guaranteed to get the kind of reaction no boring candy box could ever pull off.
You don’t just give these as a gift. You make a statement. That statement? “Here’s some sweet ass, literally.” And the best part – it ships in a discreet box, 100 percent anonymous, so your friend, lover, or mortal enemy won’t know whether to laugh, blush, or eat them immediately.
So quit being predictable. Forget roses, forget cards. ClickAdd to Cart and send someone the gift of chocolate buttholes today.
It’s the funniest edible gift ever – The shock factor alone is worth the price.
It’s actually delicious – Rich, creamy milk chocolate that melts in your mouth like… well, you get the idea.
It’s perfect for every dirty-minded occasion – Valentine’s Day, birthdays, bachelorette parties, or “just because.”
It ships anonymously – You can send a box of sweet assholes and take the secret to your grave.
Picture it: Valentine’s Day morning. They open a discreet little box. Inside? Not truffles. Not caramel clusters. Nope – a dozen perfect littlechocolate buttholes staring up at them like a naughty surprise from Cupid himself.
They laugh. They gasp. They grab their phone to send a pic to their friends. And then, after the laughter dies down, they take a bite… and realize these are actuallyamazing. Rich, velvety chocolate that melts over their tongue in the most sinful way possible.
And just like that, you’ve taken gift-giving from “meh” to “memorable” in 0.5 seconds.
“Absolute Valentines Day hit! Boyfriend got a good laugh and ate some good chocolate starfish 🤣”
“These were great! It was a gift to a friend of mine – who has received some of your other items as well! – and she loved it. Also said the chocolate was excellent. Thanks for being awesome!”
“Eat my ass chocolate buttholes, where do I even start? Is a sweet treat indeed. These decadent chocolate buttholes effortlessly melt all over your mouth and tongue in the creamiest of ways as you devour them. Very little in life will satisfy you as much as these butt holes can. Do yourself a favor and gift that special man in your life some of these!”
Handcrafted milk chocolate buttholes made with creamy, high-quality ingredients
Realistic detail that makes them hilariously lifelike
Flavor: Sweet, rich, melt-in-your-mouth goodness
Packaging: Discreet box with no branding or receipts
Delivery: Ships 100 percent anonymously
Perfect For: Valentine’s Day gift, birthday gag, anonymous prank, bachelor or bachelorette party, edible joke, funny surprise for friends or partners
Because nobody forgets the moment they’re handed a box of edible assholes. It’s the perfect mix of dirty humor and actual gourmet candy. It’s a conversation starter, a photo-worthy moment, and a delicious snack all rolled into one.
Even the people who act fake-offended will try one. And when they do, they’ll find out these aren’t just a gag – they’re seriously good chocolate.
Right now, there’s someone in your life who could use a laugh, a shock, and maybe a mouthful of milk chocolate butthole. You know exactly who they are.
Click Add to Cart. SendEat Ass Chocolate Buttholes.
Make them smile, make them blush, and give them the sweetest ass they’ve ever had.
IMPORTANT: Make sure you put the recipient's name and address in the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly.
**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**
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