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Tired of boring-ass Father’s Day cards with fishing poles and ties and dumb sentimental bullsh*t? Good. We’ve got something way better. It’s called the Happy Farter’s Day Card, and it’s basically a hand-delivered slap in the face made entirely of air biscuits.
This thing isn’t just a card - it’s a gas-powered reminder of who you are and where you came from... straight outta Dad’s fart hole. It’s a fart bomb card that detonates a full-blown ass cloud the second it's opened.
Send it to your dad. Send it to your weird uncle. Hell, send it to yourself and own the chaos.
Look, you could buy him another “#1 Dad” mug. Or you could go full psycho and send a fart bomb in a card that says Happy Farter’s Day in big proud letters.
He opens it. POP. The card farts. Your dad dry-heaves. You laugh your actual ass off.
And just like that, you’re the favorite child.
We don’t have a Pulitzer-winning fart review (yet), but the vibes are strong. Past senders have reported laughter, disgust, and one recipient allegedly left the room and “didn’t come back for 20 minutes.”
If that’s not love, we don’t know what is.
4.25 x 5.5 inch greeting card printed with “Happy Farter’s Day!”
14 pt double-sided cardstock that looks like a normal card... until it rips a one-cheek sneak
Activated fart bomb hidden inside - press it, seal it, and the countdown begins
Cellophane wrapped for clean delivery and classy chaos
White envelope included - so your target never sees it coming
Ships 100% anonymously - because you’re a fart ninja
That dad who says “pull my finger” like it’s his full-time job
Your brother who weaponizes Taco Bell
Your cousin who hasn’t matured since 7th grade (you know the one)
A gas-powered white elephant party move
Anyone who deserves to open something absolutely foul
Let’s be real - fart jokes never stopped being funny. If you’re still a functional adult and don’t lose it at a surprise butt blast, you’re probably dead inside. The Happy Farter’s Day card is a glorious blend of juvenile humor, adult execution, and just the right amount of "oh god, what is that smell?"
It’s like a perfume ad for swamp ass.
And thanks to our legendary anonymous shipping, you get to play God with someone’s nostrils - risk free.
Click that “Add to Cart” button and unleash the cloud of justice.
It’s fart-powered love in an envelope. It’s silent but deadly (well, not silent). It’s the Happy Farter’s Day card - and it’s the best way to tell someone they’re full of sh*t... with science.
Buy now. Gas later.
IMPORTANT: Make sure you put the recipient's name and address in the shipping option. Otherwise it's you that ends up with the bag of dicks, albeit deservedly.
**Recipient and purchaser must be 18 years of age or older**
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