We make it easy—and weirdly delightful—to anonymously send someone a bag of dicks.

Yes, really.

Whether it’s a friend’s birthday, your ex’s Father’s Day, a coworker’s last day, or your neighbor being a little too neighborly, nothing says “thinking of you” quite like a floral pouch filled with 2.5 inches of chewy, fruity, lovingly-crafted gummy dicks.
And it doesn’t stop there. We’ve upgraded from your standard satchel of Richards to a full-on buffet of hilariously inappropriate gift options: themed Christmas dicks, romantic Valentine’s dicks, rainbow-packed Pride dicks, and even chocolate dicks for those with more refined palates. Want to raise the stakes? Just add penis-shaped glitter. You’re welcome.

Here's what we’re really good at:

Delivering laughs disguised as candy

Making your friends panic-text "WHO SENT THIS"

Sending sugar-coated chaos without leaving your house

Keeping secrets—we don’t snitch

Making sure the dicks are, in fact, very tasty

The Experience (Straight From the Source)
We could tell you it’s fun. Or… we could let our customers do it for us:

“The service is amazing. Only very, very special people in my life receive a bag of dicks.”
“I sent it to the auto shop where my husband works. The guys were eating dicks by the handful, yelling ‘I LOVE DICKS!’”
“My husband and I are in our 60s and prank each other constantly. When the penis glitter hit his lap, I almost fell over laughing. Five stars.”
“My coworker thoroughly enjoyed all the anonymous dicks he received.”
“Perfect white elephant gift. Also, oddly tasty.”
“I sent it to my douchebag neighbor. He had no clue. Beautiful.”
“I’m running for Trustee in Fowler, Colorado. Someone sent me a bag of dicks. They were delicious. Though, honestly, I could’ve eaten more. Bigger dicks, please.”

The Use Cases Are Endless (Seriously)
We’ve seen our dicks land in:

Bachelorette party gift bags

Breakup rebounds

Birthday surprises (the kind that get screenshotted)

Office desks, unopened for hours until someone finally gets curious

The mailroom at law firms (shout out to whoever sent one to a sitting judge)

Family reunions, oddly enough

Glove compartments, because someone wanted a “road trip snack”

Some customers send a bag of dicks anonymously every year like clockwork. Others send one once and spend the rest of their lives denying it.
It’s become an annual tradition for some. A revenge strategy for others. And a weird bonding moment for far too many.

The Options: More Than Just aBag of Dicks

If you think it’s just gummy dicks and that’s it, you're adorable.

Themed Gummy Dicks
Birthday? Valentine’s? Christmas? Pride? Yes. We’ve got a dick for that.


Chocolate Dicks
Milk chocolate. Premium. Looks rude. Melts hearts.


Glitter Bomb Dicks
Our most chaotic option. It’s like a gender reveal party but with zero purpose and maximum joy. Also: glitter everywhere.

Penis Confetti (Surprise!)
Tucked inside the packaging like an evil, shiny bonus round.


And the Reactions?
Let’s just say, we specialize in:
“Caught him off guard and gave him a good laugh.”
“He said they were the tastiest gummy dicks he ever had.”
“The glitter was disgusting—incredible job. I’ll be sending more.”
“Looked like a normal package. Then boom—penis confetti all over the coffee table.”
“We laughed the whole night. Whole bag got eaten.”
“My daughter got so mad when she opened her box of dicks. LOL.”
“He said, ‘I would HATE to get these,’ so two months later I sent them. With glitter.”

Why This Works
It’s unexpected, funny, a just raunchy enough to be a little shocking, but wholesome and delicious enough to be funny. It’s a prank gift that people remember—and sometimes even thank you for.
It’s candy that sparks group chats, Instagram stories, and lifelong suspicion.
It’s a glorious bag of dicks, and it’s perfect for almost any occasion.

What We’re NOT about

This site was created to put a smile on people's faces.

It's not meant to be a threat or in any way to bully. If you are sending this with the intent to ruin someone's day, then maybe it's you who needs to eat a bag of dicks.

Final Thought from Richard Cranium
We don’t do mission statements. We send dicks.
So if you’re looking to prank your best friend, confuse your boss, or start a holiday tradition you’ll never be able to explain to HR… you’re in the right place.
Send a bag of dicks. Or two. Or ten.
Just don’t be surprised when one shows up in your mailbox next year.